That Typical VIP: A Big Bang Fanfic
by VIPfanfic
Summary: Mindy, a 20-year old college student at Stanford University, had always dreamed of meeting the five lovely members of a band called Big Bang. Her opportunity arrives when the members reply to her letter requesting a short visit while her Korean trip for language development. Little did she know that her visit wasn't going to be the last.
1. Chapter 1

"Sweetheart, there's mail on the table for you," my mother called from the dining room.

I trudged over to the polished hardwood dining table while rubbing my sleepy eyes.

"Who is it from?" I asked her while yawning.

"I don't know. It's in Korean," she replied from the kitchen.

I sat down and opened the envelope, disregarding the strange fact that someone from Korea would be writing to me. As I opened up the ink-stained piece of paper, confusion coursed through my veins. The letter was written in Hangul, the Korean language.

"What is this...?" I muttered.

Using my mediocre Hangul-reading skills, I was able to make out what most of the letter said. It went something like this:

_Annyongseo, Mindy! Sorry it took so long to reply. We were in Japan for a month or so and didn't receive this letter until returning to Korea. I know you're Korean isn't perfect and I hope you can read this._ (This next part was in a messy handwriting) _That idiot didn't even introduce himself. That was G-Dragon. It's TOP, now. It's great to hear from you. I bet it took a great deal of money for you to send your letter all the way from California! And we thought your letter was really touching and would like to reply to your request._ (Seungri adds his name) _Hello!_ (In English) _It's Panda Seungri. :) We just wanted to tell you that we would love for you to visit us in our recording studio when you go to Korea for your language training vacation this summer. 3_ (Taeyang) _Wassuuup! Please contact us through email to let us know the information so we can plan out the schedule. :)_ (Daesung) _^_^ we hope to hear from you soon!_ (All) _Saranghae! -Love, Big Bang_.

My heart pumped vehemently against my chest. Around two months ago...I remembered now. I had sent a letter to the members of Big Bang two months ago...requesting...I looked down at the letter.

"MOOOOOOMM."

Flying from California to Korea took 17 hours and a bad case of jet lag, yet I still felt the trepidation as I watched the tops of houses and buildings as my plane flew over them. I bit my lip as the plane's wheels hit the pavement.

"Are you okay?" a man asked beside me.

What?" I asked. Then I realized I was rapidly tapping my feet against the plane's floor. "Oh, yes. I'm alright."

The man rolled his eyes and returned back to his iPad.

Soon enough, the plane landed and I raced off the place, got my luggage, and entered the main area in Incheon Airport. I, then, spotted a couple holding a sign with my name on it. My brain instinctively switched from English to Korean as I walked up the them.

"Annyongseo!" I greeted.

"Annyongseo...is it...Min...dy?" the woman asked.

"Yes, it is." I smiled.

"It's nice to meet you. I'm Lee Eun Mi and this is my husband, Lee Sang Ki." She pointed to the man next to her. I bowed and shook his hand.

Then Eun Mi pointed to the little girl standing in between the two. "And this is little So Young."

As I reached out my hand to shake, she hid behind her mother's leg. "Is this your daughter?" I asked laughing.

"Yes, it is," Sang Ki chuckled. "Don't be rude, So Young. Come and say hello to your unni." So Young stared up at me with frightened eyes. "She's unnatural with strangers but I'm sure she'll get used with you soon."

On the car ride to Seoul, I called my parents to tell them I landed safely and I ran over my plans with the Lee's. By the time we reached the apartment, it was late into the night. So Young had fallen asleep and I yawned continuously.

"Looks like the girls are sleep," Sang Ki said. "I'll help you with your items and then you should rest."

As we got to the apartment door, there was a gift basket with my name on it. Sang Ki and Eun Mi looked at each other in confusion but told me to take it anyway.

Inside, I discovered snacks and a card that said: Here's a welcome basket and the card to access the YG building! We hope to see you soon!-Love, Big Bang.

I laughed and shared the snacks with the family and went to bed. I laid there, staring at the ceiling of the apartment for hours. I was in Korea and I was going to meet Big Bang.

I woke up the next morning at 12 in the afternoon to the smell of meat cooking in the kitchen. Out in the kitchen, Eun Mi was stir-frying pork with onions on the pan for lunch.

When she noticed me, she smiled and said, "Come sit and eat. Then I'll give you a tour of Seoul."

Not being able to resist the mouthwatering taste of the pork, I obediently sat down in the seat at the table in the kitchen next to So Young. She stared at me with frightened eyes in her seat and scooted a bit further away from me. I waved and smiled at her but she still stared at me, scared. Eun Mi laughed.

After breakfast, Eun Mi, So Young, and I walked around the streets of the busy downtown Seoul, rode the train, visited little shops, and ate ice cream and fish cake. At 4, Eun Mi and So Young left me at the YG building so they could go visit Sang Ki at his workplace.

My hand shook as I scanned the card to access the building. When the scanner flashed green, I pulled open the door nervously and walked into the modern, main lobby of the building.

Suddenly, a loud voice called out in a harsh dialect of Korean, "Who are you and what are you doing here?!"


	2. Chapter 2

My heart pumped against my chest as I turned around to see a tall, gorgeous lady wearing a tight black dress under a red coat with thin tights and stilettos. I instinctively looked down at my plain outfit of a floral dress and sunshine yellow pumps. Even standing 30 feet from her, I still felt inferior.

"I-I...well," I stammered.

"Hmm? Quickly. Tell me," she said.

My shyness overcame me and was ready to back away and walk out of the building when another voice behind me called out, "Oh, you're here?"

I quickly turned around, recognizing the narrow voice from hundreds of interviews and variety shows I've watched. My eyes fell upon the one and only Kwon "G-Dragon" Ji Yong. His goofy, bright grin shone underneath a rainbow beanie. As the usual fashionista, he wore a wacky outfit that...somehow worked.

He rushed up to me. "I'm G-Dragon. And call me oppa. It's nice to meet you." I stared up at him and his adorable smile.

"O-of course, you're G-Dragon..." I realized my mistake. "Oh-oh I'm sorry. I mean...Hi, I'm Mindy."

He laughed. "Relax. Just follow me, Mindy." He gestured to the elevator. Then he noticed the lady behind me. "See you later, Jae Min."

"So, Mindy. You've been learning Korean for...?" Jiyong asked.

"For f-four years..." I answered him nervously as we entered the elevator. He glanced over at me and smiled again then pushed the button to the fifth floor.

I want to."

Daesung rolled his eyes as the maknae left the room. "He's such a flirt."

"So Mindy. You actually grew up in America, huh?" Taeyang asked me.

I spun around in my chair to face him sporting a faux hawk and a hoodie and jeans. "Yes. I started learning Korean when I was 16."

"Impressive. Was it hard?" Daesung asked.

"In the beginning, yes. I spent a long time translating your guys' songs to romanization to Hangul then reading it out loud."

"Was there a specific reason for your learning?" Taeyang asked. In the background, Jiyong and TOP were arguing about how to voice his rap. I kept getting distracted by TOP's deep sexy voice.

"I-I always wanted to go to Korea and my school sponsored those who've learned for at least 3 years to go to Korea." I answered them.

I think Appa YG would want you to finish your work before you eat ice cream, oppa," I told TOP.

"Did you just say Appa YG?" Taeyang asked, chuckling as he reached for an ice cream bar from Seungri.

I blushed. It was the name VIPs used for the president of YG. I chose an awesome time to let it slip. The four laughed at me.

"Wait until the president hears about this," Seungri said handing me an ice cream bar.

In the background, TOP finished his part with motivation and rushed out of the booth to snatch a bar of ice cream.

"Chill, TOP hyung," Jiyong exclaimed. TOP ignored him and opened his ice cream.

After his first bite, he turned to me and bowed. "Sorry. I was being rude and didn't greet you formally," he told me.

Shivers trembled through my body as his brown eyes lay in contact with mine. It was hard not to just faint on the spot. I played it cool.

"Aish, I come from America. Nothing's formal there," I answered him. He grinned at me.

Seungri, who took the spot next to Taeyang, nodded at me and asked, "So Mindy, what do you like to do?" TOP took a seat on Daesung's lap as he groaned.

"Ah, hyung," he complained.

"Shh, dongseng. Mindy is talking," TOP told Daesung.

I giggled into my ice cream and said, "You know some VIPs ship ToDae, right?"

"They might not be wrong about that," TOP said as he stared intently into Daesung's eyes.

"What is this?!" Daesung cried. The rest of the members laughed.

I said to Seungri, "To answer your question, oppa, I...I guess I like to sing..."

Jiyong raised his eyebrows at me. "Is that so?" he asked. "Why don't you sing for us?"

Blush crawled onto my cheeks once again. "I don't know about that..." I answered.

"Oh come on, Mindy! Go a head into the booth!" Seungri encouraged. Jiyong took the ice cream from my hands and led me into the booth. I grew warmer under his touch.

"Just sing," he said smiling.

Then he exited the booth and sat down into the chair I front of the mixing station and asked me, "What song?"

I pondered for a bit and answered as I put on the headphones.

"Do you know Super Bass?" He nodded. "Just give me a beat for that."

Jiyong punched in some keys and a beat started playing. And I started rapping and singing. I tried to keep my eyes on a corner in the room instead of the listening members. It wasn't until a pitchy voice called out my name that I looked up. My eyes widened.

In the recording studio, holding the mic button, Appa YG said, "That's quite a voice you have there, Mindy."


	3. Chapter 3

I stared at the middle aged man in a black hat, dumbfounded. Hold on, I thought to myself. That can't be Appa YG...can it?! I tried sounding out words but nothing came out. What did he say? I had quite a voice? How did he know me? What the hell? Did Jiyong just eat my ice cream?! A swirl of questions and confusion infested my mind.

"Mindy..." Jiyong said.

"I-I can't..." I realized I had switched to English. "Sorry," I said in Korean. "It's just...I can't...Hold on...I..."

Taeyang hopped onto the tables and tapped the mic button. "Okay, take a deep breath and try again," he told me.

Seungri and TOP flashed me thumbs up in the background. I took and Taeyang's advice and tried again.

"Annyongseo, president. And thank you," I told Appa YG.

He replied, "Why don't you try another song?"

If I wasn't so freaked out, I would have laughed and ran out of the building screaming into the streets of Seoul. Instead, I froze. TOP turned to Appa YG and said something to him. Probably something along the lines of "She's going to pass out. I don't think you should push it." and "I want more ice cream."

A sudden thought entered my mind. This was a once in a lifetime chance; to sing in front of the president of YG Entertainments. THIS could lead to so many opportunities. I could even...preform with the members of Big Bang. And if I hesitated another moment, the opportunity would shatter into a million of pieces. I cleared my throat.

"I'll sing Haru Haru, if that's okay," I told him, confidently. Appa YG smiled at me and the members cheered politely for me. He gestured for that unknown dude at the mixing station to start the track for Haru Haru.

As I listen to Jiyong's voice in my ears, I took a deep breath and concentrated on the lyrics on the screen. And I sung with all my might and effort.

After the song ended, I reluctantly lifted my head to see their reactions. The members had reclined in the couch. Jiyong shook his head with his silly grin in disbelief. Seungri looked as if he was crying. The other members looked at each other without any words.

Appa YG tapped on the mic button and said, "Mindy, why don't you come out?"

With my trembling hands, I took off the headphones and exited the recording booth. When I entered the outside of the recording studio, my heart pounded unhealthily against my chest. Although the members stayed silent, they looked as if they couldn't hold in their excitement.

Appa YG gestured to the chair opposite of him at the table in the center. I sat down.

"I just have to say," Appa YG said, "that was one of the best performances I've ever witnessed in a long time for an amateur."

Beads of sweat from relief rolled down my neck. I looked over to the members and they all smiled at me. "Thank you," I shakily answered Appa YG.

He stood up from the chair and said, "I'm expecting to see you in Dancing Studio A tomorrow morning at 7."

He started for the door. Wait...WHAT?!

"Excuse me?" I asked to his back.

He turned around. "Don't you need your training?" Appa YG smirked. "Welcome to YG."

I turned to the smiling members in disbelief. I didn't hear right. I know it. Welcome to YG...?! What did that mean? What just happened? I lowered my head into my hands.

"What is this?!" I muttered.

At that very moment, I didn't care for the impression I made on the members. All that ran through my head was Appa YG's pitch voice.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up. "Are you okay?" Jiyong asked me. He couldn't keep in the grin.

"No!" I exclaimed. "How could this just happen?" He took the seat next to me as Daesung took the seat in front of me to escape from TOP. "Shouldn't there be a contract or something?" I asked the members.

"Usually," Daesung told me. I gestured to the bare table in front of me.

"Nothing here," I said.

"I think in this case, he's testing your ability to be an idol," TOP commented.

"Yeah, after a bit of training, I'm guessing he'll see if you're fit for YG," Taeyang answered.

"Reminds me of the time we debuted..." Daesung smiled at the ceiling, reminiscing.

"Okay, so if I am fit for YG, what do I do? I'm only staying in Korea for 2 weeks. And I have school!" I exclaimed, frustrated.

Jiyong laid a hand on mine. "Relax, I'm sure the president has a plan," Jiyong said.

I breathed. "Ottoke...I have that tour tomorrow too. I guess I have to cancel," I said.

"A tour?" Seungri asked.

"Of Seoul. I booked a tour and all to visit all the big places but since I have training I won't have time to go to any tours," I told them.

"Idea!" TOP yelled loudly, startling the members and me. "Why don't we-the members- give you an exclusive tour of Seoul ourselves?" he smiled brightly.

Daesung clapped excitedly. "Great idea, hyung! Great idea! We can be wearing disguises and everything."

Jiyong announced, "Why don't we start tonight? We should celebrate Mindy's entrance into YG training!"

"Would it disturb your work...?" I asked. "

Aish, Mindy, you worry too much," Seungri told me.

"We always have free time after dinner," Taeyang said. "And we'll make time for you."

I glanced at the five members around the room. A few minutes ago, they were a fantasy, only idols. Now, they were taking me on a tour of Seoul...I smiled at the members. "I think I'm the luckiest VIP of all time."

After we had planned out our meeting time and place, I bid them a farewell and rode the bus back the the Lee's apartment.

As I stepped into the hostel, Eun Mi looked up from her designer sketchbooks and smiled at me. "How did it go?" she asked.

So Young stopped playing with her dolls at the foot of her mother and stared at me. I waved to her then sat down on the couch.

"Aigoo, so much happened," I sighed. I told her all about my singing and Appa YG offering me training in YG.

When I finished, she stared at me awestruck. "That..." she trailed off. "Yes?" "That just happened?" she asked.

"Yeah, and I don't know how to work out everything. I'll have to cancel my tour and I don't know...I don't know what Appa YG has in store for me," I answered.

"You'll have to talk to your parents about this," she informed.

"Yeah, sure. I'll do it later. The Big Bang members are taking me out for dinner and a tour of Seoul tonight at 6:30," I told her.

She looked at the clock. "Well, you better get ready now."

I went to my room and pulled on normal street clothes, which were black skinny jeans, a white tank top, a navy cardigan, and high tops. I also split my hair into two ponytails. With my messenger bag, I told Eun Mi I would be back before 11 and left to the bus station.

When I reached the restaurant, the members were not present. I waited a few minutes then felt a tap on my shoulder and turned around to face five grown men with fake mustaches pasted on their upper lips. Going along with the disguise were hoodies, jeans, and high tops. Because TOP and Jiyong couldn't stand the normalcy of the outfit, they both wore beanies. TOP added fake glasses though.

"You...call these disguises?" I laughed into my palm.

Daesung began stroking his fake-stache and said," I am not Kang Daesung anymore! I am...KIM TAE JANG!"

Seungri scratched his head under his hoodie's hood. "We had to detour a whole bunch because we kept stumbling upon VIPs who looked at us like they...knew," he said.

"You guys did all of this...for me?" I felt so grateful for such down to earth men.

"No, we did it for the food and to ditch work," Jiyong said.

TOP groaned, "Can we eat now?"

We stepped into the restaurant and chose a secluded booth. I ordered for the members while they hid behind their menus. We feasted on spicy tofu soup with kimchi and bulgogi. They even made me try the super spicy version of the soup that made me cry. Taeyang felt guilty so he let me have the rest of the spicy fish cake...which made it worse.

After finishing, we walked the streets of downtown Seoul to see to shops. When we passed an ice cream store, TOP wrapped his arm around my shoulders and told me, "Would you like some ice cream, Mindy? On me."

"Ah hyung," Jiyong said, "you're only doing this for yourself."

TOP scoffed sassily. "Mindy, here, is our special guest. I want to treat her like royalty, like a true VIP." The other members let out a sigh of frustration. I laughed.

"What is up with you and ice cream, oppa?" I asked TOP as I pulled the door open for the members to step in the bright store.

TOP and I stepped up to the counter to order while the members waited a table. As we ordered, the counter girl kept staring TOP suspiciously. Cautious to not get caught, he kept his head low as he pulled out his wallet.

Suddenly, she asked," Has anyone told you that you look a lot like TOP from Big Bang?"

I felt TOP tense up beside me.

He answered smoothly," Oh, I look up to him so I try to...resemble him."

The counter girl rolled her eyes and went to get our cones. TOP let out a breath of relief. "That was close," he whispered.

"Hey, it's your fault you wanted ice cream," I whispered back. TOP smirked at me.

After taking the ice cream, we went back to walking the streets of Seoul.

Suddenly, Seungri piped up, "I have an idea of where we should go!" An understanding passed between him and Taeyang.

"Ohh," Taeyang whispered.

"Let's go!" he exclaimed.

Seungri led us to a dimly lighted park with a bridge over an artificial, decorative river.

"Oh, out of all places, you would choose this," Daesung said. The rest of the members nodded, knowing something I didn't. They continue to walk and ended up under the bridge. We sat before the river lit with lights under the rapids on the concrete.

Something clicked in my mind. "Hey, this is where you guys hung out before debuting!" I exclaimed.

"Mhmm. With HyunSeung," TOP said, biting into his ice cream.

"You realize his last words came true?" I mentioned. The members looked at me, confused. I stared back at them. "In the Big Bang documentary, before showing Appa YG his preform and for a second chance he said, 'If I don't make it, I hope I'll meet them at the top.' He's in BEAST now right?" I told them.

"Ahh...That's pleasant to hear," Daesung said, glazing at the underside of the bridge.

"Seungri also got dropped at first," Taeyang said. Seungri, who sat next to me, nodded, staring at the running water. Taeyang laid a hand on his shoulder. "

Sitting here reminds me of those days...they were so long ago," Jiyong sighed.

I said, "Imagine Big Bang without Seungri oppa. I don't think it would be the same." I heard sniffling beside me and realized Seungri was tearing up.

TOP, also noticing this, piped up, "Seungri, ah. What's up?"

"Did I say something?" I asked him, guilty that I made him cry.

He shook his head slightly and took a breath. "I just realized that I wouldn't be the same if I've never been in Big Bang, if I've never taken that second chance. All of you hyungs have changed me, and I never realized it. And I am so thankful," he said.

I've never seen Seungri so sincere and emotional. It was like an entirely different image of him. The members rushed to his side.

"Honestly, maknae," Jiyong began, "We would have never been the same without each other."

"That's why VIPs were so scared you five will split when you all did solo activities," I told them.

TOP said as he finished his ice cream, "Big Bang is infinite. When we are thirty or even forty, we will always go back to these moments."

That was when I realized that Big Bang was more than an idol group. For the past few years, I stood motionless as a VIP, not being able to see the reality behind Big Bang. Other idol groups might be closer, might even have better looking men or more popular music, but Big Bang has something more of the definition of an idol group.

Looking upon the five members, all embracing Seungri who was complaining and struggling under their weight, my pride to be a VIP soared because truly, Big Bang is infinite.


	4. Chapter 4

By 10 PM, the members decided to take the bus and walk me home. Unfortunately, a girl on the bus accidentally ran into Jiyong and knocked off his fake mustache, revealing his famous face. She freaked out and started screaming to everyone on the bus. We had to run off the bus and walk the rest of the way home.

When we finally reached the Lee's apartment, they bid me a goodbye and said they would like to see me again tomorrow morning while I begin my training. I stepped into the apartment and found Sang Ki and Eun Mi at the dining table having a cup of tea.

"Oh, Mindy," Sang Ki greeted. "Did you have fun?"

I smiled at them. "Of course! I have training early in the morning tomorrow, so I'll be going to bed now."

Sang Ki stopped me. "Be sure to tell your parents about YG."

"Alright," I told him and went into my room before he could make any further conversation about my parents.

I took a quick shower and got ready for bed. So much had happened in one day, I thought to myself. Where would this lead? Soon enough, my heavy eyelids led me into deep sleep.

The next morning, I got up early and pulled on a black V-neck and sweats and a beanie. I engulfed myself into music as I rode the bus to the YG building. Using the same card from yesterday, I accessed the building and found my way to Dance Studio A where Big Bang usually had their dance practices. I found a man in his mid 30's stretching his legs on the light wood floors. When he saw me, he quickly stood up and stretched out a hand for a handshake.

"Hi, you must be Mindy. I'm Joon Tae, your dance instructor and scheduler," he said.

I shook his hand and replied politely, "It's nice to meet."

"Why don't you take a seat next me on the floor and we'll go over your week," he said.

When we were both seated, he showed me a sheet of paper and explained to me about my schedule. I was to always report to Dance Studio A in the morning.

After lunch, my vocal instructor will come and help me with my vocals in the dance studio. At 6:30, I would be done with training. I could either go home or practice on my own.

"The President would like for you to showcase what you are working on so I think we should learn your full performance by Saturday and showcase it to the President on Sunday. How is that?" Joon Tae told me.

"I don't...Well, what if I know I won't do well by then?" I asked.

"Well, you're staying here for what...? Two weeks? The last day available for showcasing would be Wednesday but to make things faster, we should aim for Sunday," he said.

After that, we went to the computer near the seats opposing the main mirror to choose my number. "I think you should do a piece by one of the YG artists," Joon Tae advised.

"Jibe kajima..." I sang cheerfully. He raised his eyebrows at me.

"You...want to do GD&TOP?"

"Anniyeo...It's just stuck in my head. I want to do Somebody to Love," I told him.

"YES! That's perfect," he praised.

We instantly got down to work. First, Joon Tae showed me these agonizing stretches that helped me with my endurance and flexibility while dancing. Then he showed me the choreography for the first verse. We went slow at first and then at a faster pace when I got the hang of it. When it was time for the first verse evaluation, I tried my best but faltered at a few steps.

Joon Tae stopped the music as I tripped over my feet and fell down into the wooden floors.

"What are you doing?!" he scolded.

"I'm exhausted," I groaned. He stared at me firmly.

"If you want to be in YG, you have to try harder than that."

"Yah!" Jiyong, TOP, and Daesung stepped into the studio. "Don't be so harsh on Mindy," Jiyong said to Joon Tae.

TOP and Daesung came over to me and sat down. "Are you hurt anywhere?" TOP asked. "

Anniyeo." I shook my head. "Just tired."

Joon Tae sighed in frustration. "If she keeps this up, she won't be able to show the President her audition." I stared up at my dance instructor and Jiyong as I panted. This wasn't going in the direction I wanted.

I quickly got up on my feet and told Joon Tae, "I could do it. I just need some more time."

Jiyong looked at me in concern. "Don't push it, Mindy. Know your limits."

"I know my limits. And this is not it," I told him.

I went up to the computer to start the music over again. The three members and Joon Tae sat on the seats against the mirror to watch me. I tried my hardest this time, making sure to know which step came next before I did it. This time, I finished the first verse with fewer flaws.

Joon Tae nodded his head. "Hmm...It's much better than last time."

The members stood up and began to leave to go back to work. Daesung told me, "Come to the studio at lunch. We're ordering kimbap."

I smiled and nodded at them. "I'll be there!"

After they left, Joon Tae continued teaching me the choreography to the chorus. He told me it would be better if I learned the whole dance for the song then perfect it. I found that it was easier and less frustrating.

By lunchtime, I perfected the first verse and a bit of the chorus. I felt accomplished. On my way up to the recording studios, I felt how surreal all of this felt.

And it happened so quickly. I became a trainee for YG in a blink of an eye and I knew Big Bang and Big Bang knew me. I walked into the room to find the five members sitting at the table in the middle and having their lunch. Jiyong and TOP were in the middle of a discussion of which version of lyrics to use. Taeyang pointed to the empty seat next to him and I took the spot.

How was the first day of training?" he asked.

I took a few pieces of kimbap into my plate as I said, "I'm having dancing and body building lessons first then vocal lessons. I had trouble in the beginning because I didn't loosen up but I got the hang of it."

"You'll improve a lot," Seungri told me.

I laughed a little. "I actually learned another dance too." I finished the roll I had in my mouth and stood up the five pairs of eyes staring at me. "La la la la...Everybody get them high..." I sang, effortlessly.

I danced in an obnoxious, imitating way to Big Bang's debut song. Jiyong hopped up and joined me. The other members laughed and complained about how stupid the dance looked. After finishing the dance, we sat down and continued our lunch.

"It was one of the few times VIPs actually got to see TOP's belly," I told them.

TOP laid his head in hands. "Oh dear..."

I rolled my hair over to the Mac on the table and went on YouTube. "There's so many videos of the dance and on most of them is SOME comment of TOP's no skin policy."

"If you want no skin TOP, you should listen to this story," Daesung told me.

"Oh no Daesung," TOP warned. "Please don't."

"Just do it!" Jiyong yelled.

Before TOP could complain, Taeyang stuffed a kimbap into his mouth. "Go for it Daesung," Taeyang said.

Daesung laughed but started, "Once upon a time..."

"It wasn't a while ago actually..." Daesung corrected himself. TOP reclined on the couch while he chewed the kimbap and hid his face in the embarrassment soon to be present.

"Oh, just get on with it," Taeyang groaned.

"TOP hyung had just come home from working out. After he had taken a shower, he walked out into the kitchen where the four of us were eating and pulled up his shirt and said, 'Ah, don't I look so much muscular now?'" Daesung couldn't keep in his laughter while he told the story.

TOP groaned as the rest of laughed at him.

"It would make it into Big Bang history if one of you just rip off his shirt during a concert," I told them.

"He would hit us afterwards..." Seungri pouted.

Jiyong laughed at the thought of it. "That sounds like a good idea actually..." he said.

TOP sent him a glare. "Don't even dare," he warned.

Jiyong raised his arms in defense. "I'm just saying that it would be a good idea. Imagine how many fans will buy the next concert's tickets to get a chance to see that. The Internet will explode!"

"TOP GOES TOPLESS!" Daesung exclaimed.

A woman about a year or two older than me stepped into the room as TOP threw a pen at Daesung's head. I instantly recognized her as the lady that called me out yesterday, just before meeting Jiyong.

She smiled flirtatiously at the boys. "Annyongseo, oppa!" she said.

"Ah, hello, Jae Min," they all greeted.

"That's Mindy," Seungri said pointing to me as I stood up to shake her hand.

"Oh, Mindy. I'm sorry we didn't get to be properly introduced to each other," she said. "I thought you were a crazy fan who got in somehow..."

"I'm a fan...though not crazy," I told him smiling.

"Mindy is training to be in YG actually," Jiyong told Jae Min.

Jae Min raised her perfectly plucked eyebrows in an interested but fishy way. "Oh, is that it?" she said.

"Which reminds me..." I stammered under her gaze. "I have to go back for my vocal lessons. I'll see you guys later. Good bye, Jae Min-sshi."

As I rode the elevator to Dance Studio A, I couldn't help but get a feeling that Jae Min didn't like me that much. She kept looking at me as if I was something under her, like I was a peasant.

When I entered the studio, I was introduced to a short, plump woman in her 40's named Hye Ri. She was nice and liked to talk a lot about how lucky I was to just be admitted in as a trainee. As she listened to me sing a ballad in English, she told me my voice was strong and mostly in tune but we still had work to do.

Hye Ri and I worked for hours practicing a difficult ballad in Korean. She told me my weak points were on the low notes and the high notes and I had to have both on Somebody to Love.

Over and over again, I sang the first verse of Somebody to Love and the Korean ballad. By 6:15, my voice was hoarse and I could barely talk. "I don't understand why we put so much more work on my voice than my physical dancing strength," I croaked out.

She patted my shoulder. "Your voice is the only reason you would be onstage. Look at TOP-sshi. He can barely dance but he stays on stage because of his voice. If you don't strengthen your voice, then why go on stage?"

I only let out a cough because I couldn't say anymore. I felt Hye Ri's pitiful look on me.

She sighed, "Alright. We'll end today early. Make sure to drink lots of water." We both stood up and I told her goodbye in a weak voice.

After I had cleaned up, I went down the building to the cafeteria to find the five members sitting at a table, eating dinner. I felt proud of them, working from early in the morning to late at night to finish the new album they were working on.

I sat down next to Seungri and waved to them.

"Oh, Mindy," Taeyang greeted.

"How was vocal lessons?" Jiyong asked.

"Don't make me talk," I told him in an octave lower than my normal voice. He leaned back in surprise of my voice. TOP stood up and handed me a water bottle. I whispered thank you to him.

"The first vocal lessons are always brutal," Daesung told me.

"When you get home, make yourself some warm milk with honey and sugar. It'll help," Seungri told me. "I had the most trouble with singing, so I should know."

I nodded at their advice as I took a sip from the water bottle.

"Would you like some dinner, Mindy?" Taeyang asked me. I smiled at him and gestured him to stay in his seat instead of escorting me to get food. Instead of getting a whole tray of food, I took a bowl of rice with kimchi, spicy sweet fish cake, and kalbi. I sat down next to Seungri and started on my dinner.

"Ay, Mindy. If you keep eating that little, you won't have enough energy to endure the week," Jiyong told me.

I shrugged. If I ate anymore, I'd fall into a food coma. After all of us had finished dinner, we went up to the recording studio where I sat on the couch and watched. It was back-breaking work for each song, yet all five members worked on it, persistent.

At 8, Daesung and Taeyang left due to errands they had to run. I talked to Seungri about the challenges of training as TOP and Jiyong decided the music and lyrics. I finally found my voice again after drinking at least two bottles of water. At 10, Seungri began recording and TOP took a seat next to me.

"How's your voice?" he asked.

"It sounds normal again," I told him.

He smiled at me. "You'll get used to it."

My phone started ringing. We both looked down at the caller ID to find "Mother" in English. I quickly pressed the lock button to silence my phone and I turned it over so I wouldn't have to see it.

TOP stared at me. He said, "That was your mother. You know I can read English..."

I looked at his concerned expression and soft and gently but powerful stare into my eyes. "I know that..." I told him.

"Why didn't you pick up?" he asked. I stared him, afraid if I said anything, I would be wrong. "Mindy..." He was determined to know why. "Why didn't you pick up?"

I turned back to Seungri recording so I wouldn't have to look him the eye. "I don't want to."

TOP said, "That's not a real reason and that's not a good response." "Oppa, you wouldn't understand," I replied to him.

"Yes, I do," he said. "You believe that your parents are so in control of you that once you're out of their hands, you try your hardest not to distance yourself from them. You think that once you're on your own and you're doing well, you don't need them anymore but you're wrong."

I looked at him and saw the sincerity and ferocity in his almond eyes. "You don't know..." I stammered. "Yes, I do, Mindy." TOP stared down at his hands. "I've been a guilty son to my mother and father."

"I lied to my parents all the time, especially to my mom. I would tell her lies after lies so that I could get out of the house. Noona always told me to stop it because it was bad. And I ignored her," TOP told me. He scratched his head and fidgeted with his hands. "While training and during the first years of debuting, I rarely went home and to keep my mind off of the thought, I worked extra hard in Big Bang. It wasn't until a visit noona made that I realized I hurt my oma a lot."

I sighed. "Is that why you are scolding me about picking up her phone calls?"

"No...I'm not scolding you...I'm merely giving you advice. You may not know it now, but your parents are the place you call home," he told me.

"So, do you want me to call her back?" I asked him.

TOP shrugged. "I'm not going to force you. But really think about how much you're hurting her."

I had to give it to TOP. He knew exactly what I felt. My parents always kept me behind bars but once I was out...I wouldn't eever look back. I picked up my phone and called my mom back.

After the second ring, she picked up. "Mindy! You didn't pick up the first time, I got worried you got caught up with something," she greeted.

"Sorry, mom," I told her. I looked over to TOP who gave me a smile and then returned to Jiyong's side to help Seungri out with his part. "I did get caught up with a lot of stuff." I told her about what had happened yesterday and today. After listening to what I had to say, she stayed quiet.

"Mom...?" I asked.

"Okay, sweetheart. The first thing I want you to do is to talk to you're president or whatever. Then think over about this decision. Think about the major you're studying at Stanford right now. Think hard about this."

"I skipped the president part but I did think about it. I want this, mom," I told her.

"Okay..." There was silence. "Talk to the president right now and then call me back afterwards.

"Okay..." I stammered. "Talk to you later, mom."

After hanging up with her, I told Jiyong and TOP I was going to go meet Appa YG.

"He's on the top floor. Just walk in. I think he'll be there," Jiyong said.

TOP told me as I made my way to the door, "Good luck."

I stuck my tongue out at him as I walked out of the room. On the way up, I rehearsed what I was to say to Appa YG. Even so, I felt nervousness trembling through my body as the levels increased on the elevator screen. When I reached the top floor, I stepped out and took a deep breath. Then I walked confidently up to the door to his office and opened it.

Once I stepped into the room, my gaze instantly landed on the large variety of toys and trinkets of the expensive shelves. As my eyes swept the room, they finally landed on a figure sitting behind computer screens wearing a hat. With that, I lost all of my confidence and trembled in the place I stood. The figure finally looked up to me.

"Oh, Mindy. What brings you here?" Appa YG asked me with his intimidating stare.


	5. Chapter 5

I swallowed my nervousness and approached Appa YG whilst saying, "I came here to talk about my training with YG."

He somewhat smirked at me and pointed to a chair in front of his desk. "Go on. Even if it looks like I'm totally absorbed in the screen, I'm still listening. So just talk."

I cleared my throat and kept my focus on Appa YG's hat. "Well, I just got off the phone with my mom about my training in YG and she wanted me to ask you about how it's going to work out."

"So what are you concerned about?" he asked, his eyes still glued on the screen.

"Well, I'm leaving in less than two weeks. I don't know if I'm staying longer. I don't know where to stay if I'm staying longer. I don't know about the contract. I don't know anything..."

Appa YG looked from the computer screen to look me in the eye. "Mindy-sshi, take a deep breath right now and prioritize." I followed his command. "The question right now is if you want to do this or not."

I trembled in my seat. Even if it was my first day training, I started to really question if this was what I wanted. "I don't know..."

Appa YG switched his computer to sleep and focused on me. "What is holding you back? You obviously show talent in my being an idol."

"I just...It just occurred to me that I never had entertainment as a future in my mind. I'm studying to be a journalist back in America. For awhile, I thought that was my ambition. But now..."

"Okay." Appa YG spun a ballpoint pen in his hand. "Let's think simple. Do you like singing, dancing, and dressing up in ridiculous clothes to host a concert? Does the vision of doing that satisfy your dreams or future?"

I imagined myself upon a stage with thousands of screaming fans. I imagined using just my voice to satisfy others. It seemed like a fine deal. I liked singing. In fact, I loved singing. I could even pull off dancing.

"I believe it can..." I told Appa YG.

"Good! That means you can do it. I believe you can. I can see an idol in you," he said.

I stammered, "Y-you...you can?" "I know an idol when I see one. Just like Jiyong, CL, or Seven, I see that in you," he told me.

"How about the contract and..."

"Why don't we wait until Wednesday when I make my decision? Then, we can figure out your contract and hostel."

I let out a breath of relief. Somehow, having it all straightened out with the president lifted a load of stress off of my shoulders.

Appa YG looked at the time. "Woah, Mindy-sshi! It's late! I recommend you go home and get some sleep for tomorrow. "

"Yes, sir," I told him. As I stood up, I politely bowed to him.

When I was about to leave, he called me back. "We're going to have a press conference on Wednesday for Big Bang. I want you to go," he said.

"Yes, sir," I replied.

I went back to the recording studio and filled Seungri, Jiyong, and TOP in about what Appa YG said.

"Woow, the president is being really nice to Mindy," Jiyong said.

"He was so mean to me," Seungri pouted.

I yawned into my hand and looked at the clock. "It's 11. I think I'm going to go home and knock out for the night."

As I took my bag, Jiyong called me back. "Mindy, I don't think it's safe for you to go alone," he told me. He looked to TOP and Seungri. "You guys work for a bit. I'll be back soon. She doesn't live to far."

"Oppa..." I said. "I'm not a kid."

As he took my bag, he whispered to me, "Shh...I need a break."

I laughed and shook my head in disbelief. As we rode down the elevator and stepped into the late night air, Jiyong exclaimed, "Ahh...Let's go on an adventure!"

Jiyong took my hand to make sure I didn't get lost in the dark like a little kid. Although it sent sparks through my entire body, I still felt embarrassed he had to take care of me like a little kid. We boarded the almost empty bus and took a seat.

"You really are treating me like a little kid, oppa," I complained to him.

He bit his lip and smiled, sending butterflies into my stomach. "YG siblings looked after each other."

"I'm not even in YG yet, smart one," I argued.

"You're a shoo-in, Mindy." He switched to English, "No doubt."

"I got to work my butt off though," I told him.

"Just like the rest of the world," he said, punching me lightly on the head.

"It's different for me. I've never sung and danced to that extent before," I replied.

He asked me, "What did you do before coming here?"

I sighed. "I studied journalism at Stanford University. Looking back now, I'm not sure why I'm studying that."

"You doubt a lot of things before you have full faith in anything," Jiyong said. "In the beginning years of Big Bang, I doubted that being a leader of this band would be the right decision. 'Why am I doing this?' I usually asked myself. It wasn't a while until I figured out wanted-not forced-to do this. I love music. I love making music and entertaining others."

"I'm still discovering who I am and who I want to be," I told him.

"And so am I." He lifted a finger. "But we change so much, we won't know who we really are. So that's why the decisions and choices we make are who we are." I stared intently into his bright eyes.

"That was the most amazing thing I've ever heard." He laughed at me. "Not all idols are Bingu. That's just TOP."

I gaped at him. "Woah there, oppa."

He cracked up and tried to cover up the insult. "I'm kidding. I love TOP."

"We all know you love TOP," I told him, grinning and raising my eyebrows.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, suddenly serious.

"Well, GTOP is quite the shipping," I said. He laughed.

"Ahh...I've seen the pictures you VIPs have edited for me and TOP."

"We just have this tendency to pair a member with a member even if they're the same gender," I replied. "GTOP is the most popular one."

"I would hope it would be." Jiyong winked at me. After dropping me off at the Lee's apartment, he told me to see him tomorrow and left. I quickly took a shower and got ready for bed. I fell asleep in an instant.

The next morning, I woke up sore and more tired than I started out to be. I got up and got ready, determined. As I rode the bus, my eyes drooped as Daesung's sweet, angelic voice sang into my ear. I almost missed my stop but woke up to the beginning of Hands Up.

As I scanned my card to access the building, I tried to keep myself awake by softly singing along. When I reached Dance Studio A, I was awake enough to begin dancing. I was sloppy, exhausted, and sore. Joon Tae sighed in frustration as I lied on the floor, panting.

"You are worse than yesterday," he complained.

"I'm sorry. I don't think I got enough sleep..." I told him.

He sat down next to me. "What time did you go to sleep?"

"11:30, last night," I replied.

He stood up. "No wonder. Okay, sit up. I've got just the thing for you."

I had to experience the most excruciating stretch ever to wake me up. After 15 sets of the stretch and 2 cups of coffee, I was wide-awake, dancing almost perfectly to every beat. By lunchtime, I learned most of the song already. Joon Tae left, satisfied at my progress.

Since I had 30 minutes of lunch, I went up to Big Bang's recording studio to visit them. I let myself into the room and took the seat on the couch, suddenly feeling fatigue. All the members were there except TOP. They greeted me.

"Hey, Mindy," Jiyong called to me. "How do you like this?" "What song is this?" I asked as I stood up to see the lyric document and as the track played.

"Bad Boy. It's for our new album," Seungri told me.

"Let me guess," I said, covering my eyes. "Jiyong oppa will start out with the first verse and then Seungri oppa will join in with the pre-chorus. Taeyang oppa will take the chorus. Jiyong oppa goes again for part of the second verse. Then Daesung oppa comes in and sings an awesome high note before the chorus where Taeyang oppa sings again. TOP oppa finally comes in with a rap and the song ends with Taeyang oppa."

The four members stared at me with bewildered eyes and silence. I looked at the lyric document and found a carbon copy of what I stated.

"How...did you know?" Jiyong asked.

"It's too predictable," I told him. I sat back down on the couch. "Have you ever thought of having TOP oppa sing or rap the chorus and Taeyang oppa singing the bridge?"

The four members instantly started working again. "Hyung," Taeyang told Jiyong, "I think that would be a really good twist."

Daesung bowed in my direction. "Thank you, Mindy," he said.

I smiled at them. I showed my courtesy by bringing up lunch for them from the cafeteria. We ate and discussed even more ideas for "Bad Boy".

Afterwards, I attended my vocal lessons. Hye Ri found out about the 2 full cups of coffee. She told me the coffee I drank with that much cream was going to affect my singing and she had ways to challenge that if it were ever to happen before a concert.

Midway through the lesson, a medium-height man stepped into the room and sat down on the couch pushed against the wall. I only realized it was Appa YG when he started moving his head to the beat. I stopped in nervousness.

"Oh, president. Annyongseo," I greeted, bowing. Hye Ri followed suit.

"Oh hello," he replied. "Just continue."

I felt my palms clam up and the microphone slightly slip from my grip. I looked to Hye Ri and she smiled in encouragement.

I cleared my throat and began the English ballad for Appa YG. I already felt failure. In some parts of the song, I forgot the lyrics. In some other parts, I sang the wrong notes and out of all days, I had a scratchy throat, still raw from dancing and singing yesterday.

After finishing, I looked to the floor in shame as I awaited Appa YG's criticism. He made the famous sound of his with his tongue and began lecturing me.

"I understand it's your second day training and it's always the worse but I know you can do better. Be sure to pick up the speed on learning so you can perfect it by Sunday or Wednesday. I know you can do it, Mindy-sshi but this is a bit pathetic." He sighed. I continued to stare at the floor. "Continue your work ."

With that, he left the room. I collapsed onto the floor, frustrated and heartbroken. It's obvious the second day would be the worse. Why did the president have to be so harsh on me?

Hye Ri knelt down next to me. "Are you okay, Mindy-sshi?"

I wiped the lone tear at the corner of my eye and stood up. "Let's go again," I said, determined.

Again, I worked until 6:30 and went down to the recording studio where Big Bang was. This time, TOP was the only one in the studio.

"Annyongseo, oppa," I greeted him. He turned around in his chair to face me.

"Mindy-sshi, I heard about your suggestion," he said. He clicked something on the computer screen. "It puts a huge twist in the song but I think it's going to be one of the best in the album."

"Thank you," I smiled. The rest of the members stepped with a tray of food for TOP. They had gone down to eat while TOP finished up a few edits.

"So where should we go with Mindy today?" Daesung asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I'm fine with going anywhere."

Seungri asked me, "Did you have dinner yet?"

"I'll get dinner at one of the vendors," I replied.

Taeyang suggested, "Why don't we go to the Namsan Tower at 7?"

"Sounds like an adventure!" Jiyong exclaimed.

As TOP ate his dinner, he piped up, "Let's get ice cream before going." We all rolled our eyes at him.

The six of us went to the Namsan Tower at 8 and rode the lift across the city to another tower. Once again, the members wore their ridiculous disguises. The whole time, Daesung announced historical facts here and there like a tour guide. Taeyang got so annoyed he bought fish cake from the vendors to shut Daesung up. It didn't work because TOP, Jiyong, and Seungri stole them and ran off, shouting nonsense into the night. Nonetheless, I had fun and learned more about Seoul and the Korean culture.

By 10, my eyes became droopy and it was hard for me to follow the members back to the bus station for my ride home.

"Mindy...you look like the walking dead," Jiyong chuckled.

A loud yawn escaped my lips. "I'm just sleepy," I answered, my words stumbling over each other.

TOP stopped in front of me and bent his knees. "I'll give you a piggyback to the bus station," he offered.

"HOLD UP," Taeyang protested. "Why do you get to do it, hyung? What if I want to do it?"

"Because I'm the tallest and oldest," TOP replied simply.

"I have abs," Taeyang argued.

Seungri jumped in. "I have abs too."

"So do I," Daesung said.

"Oh, guys..." Jiyong laughed.

By the time they finished arguing, we already reached the bus station. TOP was threatening to smack Seungri and Taeyang and Daesung were arguing on the best ways to keep abs. Jiyong and I boarded the bus and sat on the seat we sat on last time. The other loud members sat in the seats behind us.

"Ugh, these idiots. If they keep yelling at each other, we'll be caught," Jiyong whispered to me. "Lucky enough, there's no teenage girls on this bus."

I nodded my head, sleepily. Not being able to resist the urge to close my eyes, I leaned my head against the window and slowly lowered my eyelids.

Seeing this, Jiyong chuckled and gently moved my head to rest on his shoulder. I instantly opened my eyes to look into his bright brown ones. "Jiyong oppa..." I said.

He grinned and turned slightly to address the still arguing members behind us. "Ey, idiots. Look who won."

TOP was about to start yelling at Jiyong but was stopped by Jiyong who put his finger to his lips. "Let Mindy close her eyes for a bit," he said.

I smiled and comfortably relaxed on Jiyong's shoulder. I closed my eyes and when we reached the stop near the apartment, Jiyong woke me up.

TOP, frustrated, insisted to carry me on his back the rest of the way home. I didn't even have the energy to tell him not to. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he lifted me up onto his warm back.

"This isn't fair," Taeyang muttered.

"Taeyang oppa," I said. "You can hold my hand."

He smiled and gripped my hand.

I muttered into TOP's shoulder, "You guys all fighting over to make me happy...you make me feel so special. I can't ask for more than all of you. I'm so glad...I met all of you."

They smiled at each other. I fell asleep by the time we reached the Lee's apartment. I had to ask Eun Mi how I got into bed the next morning. She told me all five members appeared at the door.

"TOP carried you to bed and put you in like a father. Then the other four members sang you a traditional Korean lullaby, hoping you would still be slightly awake to hear." She laughed as she braided So Young's hair. "I don't know if all idols are like this but it's either they really are this caring or you've changed them."


	6. Chapter 6

Since I was invited to go to Big Bang's press conference, my training had to be cut short and go into lunch. I didn't get to see any of the members until 5. I wore a sleeveless blouse and a blazer and a floral skirt with wedges; my attempt to look casual but presentable. They all wore formal but stylish suits.

We all climbed into the usual van where I sat in front. They all talked to each other and to me as if they were on their way to the park. To myself, I trembled nervously in my seat even if I wasn't the one in the conference.

When we reached the building, a crowd of fans was at the entrance. There was a complication with the security guards to lead the members to the building. Somehow, there was a shortage. To solve the problem, the members held onto each other's hands to move through the crowd.

Seungri, who was at the end of the line, saw I was standing alone, not knowing what to do and quickly grabbed my hand to walking into the building. As I passed the fans pressing closer to the members, I heard them shout comments about me. _"It's her! What is she doing? Why is she holding Seungri oppa's hand!? What is going on? Who is she?"_

It's...her? What did that mean? Do the VIPs know who I am? How is that possible?

As we entered the building, the members were directed to stylists who touched up their makeup. I saw Jae Min and quickly waved to her. She was too busy touching up Daesung's make up to take notice of me. Taeyang finished first and sat on the couch, drinking a bottle of water and talking to a staff member.

"Ah, Mindy-sshi!" a voice called me from behind. I turned around to find Hye Ri snapping the cap on the hairspray bottle.

"Oh, Annyongseo, Hye Ri sunbae," I greeted, bowing politely. "I didn't know you were one of the stylists too."

"Come sit," Hye Ri offered. "I'll touch up your makeup too."

I blushed. "Oh, I don't wear makeup."

"Oh!" Hye Ri laughed. "Come!"

I sat down obediently and Hye Ri started patting foundation on my skin. The whole time, Hye Ri talked to me about how nice my skin was and how this tool worked and that.

Jiyong noticed me at the dressed table as he and the members began to leave. "Oh, Mindy," he said. "We'll be going now. Just meet us at the conference room."

I nodded happily at him. Hye Ri finished my makeup and smiled at me.

"I barely had to do anything!" she announced.

I looked in the mirror. With the eyeliner, my eyes looked wider and brighter. My lips shone and my skin looked so much healthier.

"Oh...thank you, Hye Ri sunbae," I told her.

She started packing up her supplies. "Me and the other stylists will be leaving first so I'll see you tomorrow." I bid them a goodbye as they left the room. There was no one else left in the room.

Just as I was about to go to the conference room, someone sent me a text. I looked down to my phone to find a text from Jiyong: "Please bring me my rings on my dressing table. I forgot them."

Knowing the fashionista Jiyong, I found the gold and silver rings with large fake jewels on his dressing table. I slipped them into the pocket in my blazer and made my way to the conference.

Just as I stepped into the back room of the conference room, I was almost run into a rushing man in a suit. The back room was in chaos. Everyone was running and I knew right away something didn't turn out right.

Jae Min ran up to me with a frustrated expression on her equally pretty face. "Mindy!" she exclaimed. "Perfect. I need you to go to the coffee shop a few blocks from here and buy 10 mocha lattes." She pushed a wad of money into my hands.

"Wait," I said as I reached into my blazer's pocket to touch the rings. "Why? What's going on?"

She sighed obnoxiously. "There's this huge complication with the mangers of this place. Something about the members being so popular, fans are swarming the building. The coffee is an apology." Jae Min was about to walk away but quickly turned back. "Oh, actually, go find a donut shop near there and buy two dozens, too." She hurried off.

"Hold up! What kind..." She was out of earshot. "...do you want...?"

I looked down at the wad of money and began my mission. Instead of taking the front entrance, I took the exit in the back and walked to the coffee shop. It took me 10 minutes to reach the place and 15 to order the coffee. Along with that, I didn't find a donut shop until 3 blocks away, where I became so frustrated, I accidentally tripped over myself and spilled a box of donuts. Lucky enough, only a few fell onto the dirty floor and the shop owner was nice enough to exchange them for me.

By the time I reached the conference building, the coffee was lukewarm and my hair was a mess. What was even better was that the back door didn't open so I had to fight through the crowd of fans, show the guards by card, and carry 10 cups of coffee and two dozens of donuts. I returned to the back room and didn't find Jae Min so I tried the dressing room.

The moment I stepped in, all eyes turned to me and two security guards took me by the arms.

"HOLD UP," I exclaimed. "I have donuts and coffee about to fall out of my hold. Please, take them before proceeding onto whatever you are doing."

Another guard took the food from me and delivered them to the directors. Still, the other guards kept me on hold. I took a quick glance around the room and I knew something worse happened.

There were police officers and the members sat on the couch as if they found out Big Bang was about to be disbanded. The room was also a mess. Cushions from the couch were on the floor. Jae Min's makeup box was open and her cosmetics were scattered. The coffee table was turned over.

Jae Min rushed over to me. "Do you have it?" she demanded.

Jiyong stared up at the ceiling and groaned. "Why would she have it, Jae Min-sshi?"

"She was the last person to leave the dressing room," Jae Min said harshly. "Who else would have it?"

I trembled under the guards force, confused. "May I ask...what is going on...?" I asked.

"Guards, please check her pockets," Jae Min said.

Instantly, the guards reached into the pockets of my blazer. One of them brought out the silver and gold rings Jiyong had asked me to get. The members suddenly stood up, their glares at me intense.

"There's the evidence. I saw her reach into her pocket while talking to her!" Jae Min said.

Jiyong approached me. "Did you really steal these rings, Mindy?"

"Wait..." The puzzle pieces connected in my mind. Fear passed through my eyes. "No! No! I would never steal anything!"

A tall police officer stepped up to me. "Then why do you have Jiyong's rings?"

"Jiyong asked me to get them for him!" I exclaimed, frightened. What was going on!? Disbelief dawned on Jiyong's face but was quickly replaced by disappointment and disgust.

"I didn't ask you to get me anything," he whispered harshly at me.

"The evidence is clear," the police officer stated. "Mindy is accused of stealing the Tiffany and Co. rings Kwon Jiyong borrowed. You will be taken to the police station for questioning."

Did he just say I stole something!? I didn't steal anything! As I was escorted by the guards to the entrance, I watched behind me as Jiyong's disbelieving face blur out with tears.

The guards escorted me out of the building. Fortunately, they made sure to to cover most of my face so that the fans wouldn't see. In the back of the police car, I kept in my tears so that I wouldn't seem weak on front of the interrogator.

When we reached the police station, I was led into a normal looking office with a handsome man sitting behind a cluttered desk.

Wanting to be polite, I bowed and greeted," Annyongseo, ahjusshi."

He stood up and bowed to me too. "Annyongseo. Please, sit." He gestured to the seat in front of the desk. I took a seat and slipped my hands underneath my thigh to stop them from shaking. He got straight down into business. "I don't think there is a legitimate reason for introductions so let's get started. You are Mindy-sshi, correct?"

"Yes, I am," I answered, feeling sweat at my hairline.

"You've been accused of stealing two real Tiffany and Co. rings that Kwon Jiyong borrowed. Are you aware of this?" the man asked, scanning a sheet of paper.

"Yes..."

"Can you give me a description of these rings?" he asked, putting down the paper and staring into my eyes.

I stammered, "O-one was..." I began stumbling over my words. "One was gold...I-well, it has..."

I was stopped by the door knob to the room noisily turning. In stepped Jiyong and the rest of the members. He has a stone hard face, expressionless. TOP and Daesung both looked in my direction with sad but hopeful eyes.

The interrogator and I stood up as Jiyong pulled out the rings and stated, "The rings are right here. There's no need to interrogate her."

I stared at Jiyong. He was already ready to bail me out even before my jailing.

"I'm sorry to say," the interrogator said, "she was accused of a crime. It's my job to interrogate her."

"There's nothing to interrogate her about. She was simply taking the rings to me when she was interrupted due to important errands," Jiyong argued.

The man looked down at his piece of paper. "It says that-"

Jiyong interrupted him, "The police officer heard wrong. I'm sorry for wasting your time."

He began to walk out of the room and the members followed me. Taeyang laid a hand on my shoulder and guided me out to the car parked in front of the building. Jiyong sat in the passenger's seat this time and stayed silent the whole time from the station to the YG building. In fact, barely a word was said during the car ride. A few times, Seungri asked me if I was hungry or if I was okay in which I answered with a nod or a shake of my head.

When we reached the YG building and stepped into the main lobby, Jiyong stopped and turned to me for the first time since the incident. "Mindy, I think you should go home now," he said. "I'm going to talk to the president."

He was about to walk away but I said," Jiyong oppa, you don't believe me."

He stopped walking and turned around. Tears started to fall from my eyes.

"I'm so sorry, oppa. But I didn't steal the rings. I really didn't," I cried.

"There are other things to worry about right now," he simply said and walked off the elevators.

I really began to cry after he had disappeared into the elevators. I knew I had just screwed everything and Jiyong had to fix it. It was my entire fault. How did I let this happen?

TOP stepped in front of me and wrapped his arms around me. "It's going to be alright, Mindy. We can take care of it," he said.

I took a step back from him. I shook at me head the four members looking at me with sympathy. "I don't want any of you to fix what I caused," I told them. I wiped my eyes on my sleeve. "I think being here right now is going to make things worse."

Seungri shook his head as his eyes filled with tears. I took a deep breath. "I'll be going now," I told them and walked out of the building quickly.

When I got home, there was no one on the apartment. I found a note from the Lee's saying they were visiting some family and won't be back until tomorrow. Since I was alone, I took that opportunity to collapse onto my bed and begin crying again.

What had I just done? Not only will the fans know that something is up, but Appa YG will probably terminate my spot of training. Just because of being stupid and not giving Jiyong those rings right away.

Now...Jiyong...I couldn't get Jiyong's strained, disappointed face out of my mind. I eventually stopped feeling sorry for myself and changed into pajamas. Tomorrow morning, I will go up to Appa YG and fix this myself.

At 8:30, there was a knock on the door and I opened it to find Taeyang, Seungri, Daesung, and TOP standing there smiling as if nothing happened. Their eyes traveled over to my red eyes but they kept smiling.

"Are you alone?" Daesung asked. I stared at them without saying anything.

TOP elbowed Seungri to say something. "Oh, we wanted to invite you to come over to our house to watch a movie," he offered.

I still didn't say anything.

"Oh come on, Mindy," TOP urged. "It'll be solved. Just not today."

"Tomorrow, you can think about it. But tonight, you need to let things go," Taeyang told me. I stared at them blankly.

"Please," Daesung pleaded.

As if on cue, all four members pouted. It only brought out the fact that Jiyong was still at the YG building talking to Appa YG. But I couldn't resist their adorable puppy faces especially TOP's and Seungri's. I sighed and took a jacket and my phone. They cheered. I locked the door and the five of us walked out into the night to Taeyang's car. A

s I sat in the car, listening to their stories, a series of pings went off on my phone there were 10 paragraphs from Jiyong. I skipped the first three because they were basically a greeting. The actually message he sent was that I was to talk to Appa YG tomorrow morning to not worry too much about what would happen and that he wasn't mad at me.

At the end, he added: "No matter what happens, I'll always stand by with you. As for the members too. We've all been through this and this will help shape you into a perfect idol. I'll see you soon. Saranghae."

We reached the Big Bang hostel after twenty minutes of Taeyang's driving. I officially stepped into the living quarters of the Big Bang members. On normal circumstances, I would have overly fangirled and pass out on the floor. But since I've been accused of stealing rings and Big Bang's Kwon Jiyong was out to fix it, these circumstances were not normal.

The hostel was moderately medium-sized. In the sitting room was a flat screen TV with a black incredibly comfortable looking couch. In the adjoining room was the kitchen and the dining room. The other doors led to the members' rooms and Jiyong's closet.

"Have a seat on the couch," Daesung offered, taking my jacket for me.

"I'll get the ice cream," TOP volunteered.

Seungri and Taeyang went to their rooms to change into their sweats. After getting the ice cream and setting it on the couch, TOP also changed to sweatpants. I was left alone in the sitting room.

Taking the opportunity, I sat down in front of the shelf underneath the TV to pick out movies. Most of them I've heard of since the members liked to watch American movies. My eyes landed on 71-Into the Fire where TOP was the main character. The members stepped out of the room and found me on the floor looking at the back of Into the Fire DVD case. Seungri and Daesung took a seat on the couch.

"You're up for some gun action?" Taeyang asked sitting in the bean bag next to me.

"Hmm, I already watched it," I answered.

Seungri replied, "Up for TOP hyung dying?"

TOP made his way over to Seungri and threatened to beat him.

"I love this movie," I told Seungri.

"Then let's watch it!" Taeyang exclaimed. He took the DVD from my hands and inserted it into the player.

The movie began. I took a seat between Daesung and TOP and Seungri reached for the light switch. During the movie, we passed along the tub of green tea ice cream to eat from it. About every five minutes, a member would comment on TOP's acting or how TOP looked or how cool TOP was pointing a gun. TOP stayed silent. I watched obediently, concentrating on the plot so that my mind wouldn't wander off on what had happened earlier.

An hour later, the movie reached its ending. As I watched TOP load the bullet that started it all into his rifle, tears formed in my eyes. Even if I had already watched it, the scene was still so moving. I really lost it when TOP lied in his comrade's arm, with his beautiful eyes knowing death. It wasn't until the movie that all of the members were staring at me with tears racing down my cheeks.

"You okay, Mindy?" Taeyang asked.

I quickly wiped my eyes. "Of course," I answered.

TOP laid his hand on mine. "Was that a believable death?" he asked.

"Meh," I answered, my crying ending.

"What do you mean by 'meh'?" he asked, startled.

I shrugged. "I could have cried harder."

The members burst out in laughter as TOP stared at me in disbelief. The door knob turned to reveal Jiyong stepping in. He looked over at the members on the couch and then me.

I quickly stood up. "Jiyong oppa," I greeted.

The other members turned to doing other things. He had a tired, stone hard expression. I was afraid he only texted me those things to make me feel better.

Suddenly, he opened his arms wide open and said, "Come here, Mindy."

I immediately knew it was going to be alright. I ran into his outstretched arms to he enveloped in the warm, strong arms of Kwon Jiyong. He placed his chin upon my head in a caring way.

Suddenly, Daesung ran over to us and wrapped his arms around Jiyong and me. "GROUP HUG!" he shouted.

The other members shouted cheered and joined in the group hug. Being grown men who work out all the time, it didn't take a long time before I felt like I was suffocating.

"Oppa..." I wheezed.

"Yah..." Jiyong complained, laughing.

They finally let me go. After changing, Jiyong joined us on the couch to watch another movie. Feeling better than I felt before, I mass texted all of them a message. In an instant, five phones rung off to a different text tone. They all read at the same time as a smile spread on my lips, "Fighting!"

After the second movie and another tub of ice cream(TOP's stash of ice cream is unbelievable), Taeyang drove me home where I took a shower and knocked out.

The next morning, I pulled on a pair of navy blue shorts, a white lace tank top with a red cardigan, and heeled sandals, ready to face Appa YG. When I reached the building, I walked in to see Jae Min coming from the elevators. She glanced my direction and didn't say anything as she walked out the front doors. What was this girl's deal?

I rode the elevator up to the top floor and stepped into the large room with many toys and ornaments. Appa YG sat on a couch laid in front of the glass coffee table.

When I walked in, he looked up from some papers and greeted me, "Oh, Mindy-sshi. Good morning. Have a seat."

I quickly bowed to him and took the couch in front of him. He quickly finished looking through the papers and then turned his attention to me. Appa YG wore a different hat today, navy blue with a tiny symbol I didn't see. Seriously, this man and hats.

"Your story is out. Well-sort of," he said.

My brain wasn't able to put it together. "W-what?" I stammered.

Appa YG stood up and took a laptop from his desk and sat back down. "Have you been checking the Internet?" he asked.

I shook my head. "I haven't had the time for it," I answered.

Appa YG pulled up a page on the laptop and turned it towards me to see. "You're almost everywhere on VIP pages. They are all wondering what you have to do with Big Bang," he said.

Then he pointed to a picture of me sitting next to Jiyong on the bus taken from the outside. "Is she Jiyong's girlfriend?" He scrolled down to a picture of Seungri holding my hand and pulling me through the crowd at the conference building. "Or Seungri's?" he questioned. "What is she doing at the recording studio with Big Bang?"

There was a picture of Taeyang he instagrammed with me in the background with Seungri. The last picture showed me getting in the police car with my face half covered by a police officer but my eyes were clear. "What is she doing getting in a police car?" Appa YG asked no one in particular. "VIPs are coming up with theories after theories. One says you're one of the members' girlfriend. Another says you're a new stylist. This one says you're their personal prostitute."

"What the hell?" I exclaimed.

"I know. VIPs are a little insane," Appa YG replied in a knowing way. "But on one VIP's blog-which is the most popular-, they got it right."

Appa YG read off of the website: "_Who is this mysterious girl Big Bang is hanging around? Anonymous says she is a new project Appa YG plans to release soon in association with Big Bang. In each picture, we can see that the Big Bang members really care for her. Why? What makes her so special? Nothing. In fact, she might be the opposite of special. In the photo shown below, we can see this demon being escorted into the police car after attending the press conference of the Big Bang members. What could have this hag done? Anonymous says that Mysterious Girl stole expensive jewelry from Big Bang in which she got caught. Let's hope she gets terminated before she plagues us with her stupidity. Get away from our oppas!_"

I couldn't hold in the tears. Did their fans really think that about me? I never tried to be someone more special than all the other VIPs out there. I was just a typical VIP who got lucky. Demon...hag...All those words hurt so much. Appa YG looked at me as I tried to suppress my tears.

"This doesn't mean that I agree with what the article says about you. I just agree with the circumstances." He sighed. My eyes quickly scanned the comment section. I saw: "_Bitch...whore...slut...hideous..._"

"In the other articles," Appa YG said, "it mentions how Big Bang is getting tangled into a web of disaster."

Tears rolled down my cheek. "Well what am I supposed to do?" I cried, frustrated. "I didn't steal anything! And I'm just like every other VIP out there!"

"Except you work for YG," he said. He closed the the laptop. "Look, Jiyong and I and the other members believe you 100%. We just need the evidence to prove that to the media."

I wiped my eyes on my sleeve. "What? Evidence? Jiyong oppa already told me he never sent me a text saying he wanted me to bring the rings. What can we do?"

Appa YG froze. "Did you say Jiyong sent you a text telling you to get the rings?"

"Apparently, no. I don't know where I got the idea of giving him the rings! That day was so crazy," I answered.

Appa YG held out his hand. "Let me see your phone, Mindy-sshi."

"What is it..?" I asked, slipping my phone out of my pocket and handing it to Appa YG. He ignored me and went into my messages to Jiyong then scrolled up.

"Damn Jiyong. Why does he have to send so much texts." Suddenly, he stopped.

"What is it?" I asked again, nervous.

"I think we found the evidence to your innocence," Appa YG exclaimed. He turned the phone to face me. On the phone shone the text Jiyong had sent me on that day. It was real. I hadn't imagined it.

"_Please bring me my rings on the dressing table. I forgot them._"


	7. Chapter 7

"Call Jiyong," Appa YG said, handing me his phone.

My hand shook as I tapped on Jiyong's contact number and placed the phone to my ear. Could this really prove my innocence? Jiyong answered after the third ring.

"Jiyong oppa!" I exclaimed when he picked up.

"Oh, Mindy," he answered, surprised. "Why...are you calling on the president's phone?"

"It's urgent. Are you in the YG building right now?" I asked.

"No...I'm picking up a new scarf from Hermés. What's the matter," he replied.

I rolled my eyes. Of course, he would be shopping. "Well, I think we found evidence to my innocence!" I said.

I heard yelling in the background. Jiyong's voice returned to my ear. "I'll be right there."

Ten minutes later, Jiyong burst into Appa YG's room, holding three shopping bags and a Starbucks cup. "

Let me see it," he instantly said, depositing the bags onto my lap and the cup onto the table. Appa YG handed him my phone. "I never sent this," Jiyong said, bewildered.

Appa YG replied, "Let me see your phone."

Jiyong slipped his phone out of his pocket and handed it to Appa YG. After 30 seconds of scrolling through Jiyong and my messages, Appa YG's eyebrows scrunched up in frustration. "It should be here..." he muttered.

Jiyong took the phone from Appa YG's fingers. "I told you, didn't I?"

"Well..." I said, "you can delete messages."

Jiyong and Appa YG looked at me as if I was mad. Jiyong shook his head in disbelief. "Are you saying I framed you? Oh my goodness, Mindy. Why would I ever do that?"

My eyes widened and I held up my hands in defense. "No! Oh my God, no. I'm not saying you framed me. I'm saying...someone else might have framed me," I protested.

Jiyong sat down next to me. "Well, I didn't have my phone when I supposedly sent that text."

"Who had it?" Appa YG asked.

"One of the staff members," Jiyong said. He picked up his coffee cup. "All of the other members left their phone with the staff too. It wouldn't be good if it went off during the press conference."

"Then...would it be one of the staffs...?" Appa YG stammered.

"That's absolutely absurd! We're all family."

"I know. It doesn't add up," Jiyong answered.

I sighed. "It doesn't matter. We'll just with the media saying it's a scratched out case."

"It doesn't solve anything," Jiyong told me.

I shrugged. "What can we do? The rings are where they belong. Who's hurt?"

Appa YG shook his head. "You are."

We stayed silent for a while. Appa YG was smart. He knew that because of the story that had gotten out, if I was to debut, it would be harder for me to achieve the attention and media I wanted.

Appa YG stretched out his arms. "I could simply hold a press conference to protect Mindy-sshi's name. It wouldn't clear up everything but it should do well enough."

"What are you going to say?" Jiyong asked.

"It's all a misunderstanding. Mindy-sshi was asked to give you to the rings and was accused wrongly," he answered.

"What if they ask who I am?" I questioned.

"Classified," Appa YG said. He stood up and so did we. "Alright, you two. Get back to work," he ordered.

We both politely bowed to him and walked out to the elevators. As we rode down to the dancing studios, Jiyong kept shaking his head in disbelief.

"Aish, I can't think any of the staff would this!" he exclaimed.

"Me neither," I sighed. "It doesn't matter, oppa. I'm fine. We're all fine."

"I guess..." Jiyong answered, softly. He dropped me off at Dance Studio A and I greeted Joon Tae to begin my dance training.

"You had a tough day yesterday, huh?" Joon Tae asked as he stretched with me.

I groaned as I felt my muscles tense up. "Oh God, don't get me started."

I finally finished my training with Joon Tae by lunch. Since I was so close to finishing, I skipped lunch to practice a little bit more. I ended up having to eat a granola bar because I started to feel faint.

Hye Ri came to give me my vocal lessons when I was midway through my tenth run of the dance. She sat down at couches on the side of the room to watch me finish it. When I finished, she stood up and turned off the music.

"You're so determined," she stated.

I reached for my towel and water bottle. "Yeah, well...with what happened yesterday, I need to get this number down and cover up that huge mess."

She had the instrumental version of the song ready for me but didn't play it. Instead, Hye Ri looked over at me and said, "I don't believe what they say about you."

I smiled. "I was hoping you wouldn't."

She took a deep breath. "Okay. Why don't you sing and add your dance routine to see how you'll hold out dancing and singing."

"Challenge accepted," I winked at her.

I guess I did alright but Hye Ri taught me handy ways to keep my breath while dancing and dancing since that has always been the problem. I finished training by 6:30 and had dinner really quickly so I could join the members in the recording studio. They all greeted me warmly when I stepped in. I took a seat in front of the Mac.

"How's 'Bad Boy' going?" I asked Jiyong.

He looked over at me and smirked. "Way better than I expected. Want to hear what we have so far?"

I nodded, excited. I would be the first VIP to hear what could be one of their new singles.

"Shut up, Seungri," Jiyong told Seungri who was making weird noises in the recording booth instead of practicing how to sing his part in the song.

TOP pushed the spacebar to start the song. As I listened to the minute of it, I felt shivers run through my body. It was so good it sent goosebumps to my skin. When the incomplete track finished playing, I clapped enthusiastically.

"Oh my gosh. This is beyond awesome," I commented.

"Courtesy to TOP and Jiyong for the lyrics," Taeyang complimented.

I turned to TOP. "Oppa, I didn't know you write the lyrics for your songs too. I thought it was only Jiyong oppa."

He shrugged. "I started writing on GD&TOP and Tonight."

"Geniuses." I turned to Daesung. "Oppa, you did really well with your solo."

He lifted his hand and started flapping his wrist like a penguin. I was met with his angelic smile. "Oh, Mindy~" he answered.

As Seungri continued recording, I scrolled through the sites and responses of VIPs for the press conference yesterday. Reading some of the comments made me madder and madder until I couldn't keep it in.

"Oh my God!" I exclaimed.

Taeyang who sat next to me rolled his chair over to me and Daesung came to the computer screen. "What is it?" Taeyang asked.

"These comments! One says Daesung oppa looks like he doesn't have eyes. One says TOP oppa is a stiff robot that looks like a girl most of the time. And another says you're a complete loser. There's more about the other members too!"

Daesung patted my shoulder. "Chill, Mindy. We get them all of the time."

"Unacceptable," I muttered shaking my head.

"So what?" Taeyang shrugged. "It's just some. It's not going to affect us at all."

I sighed. "I don't like it when someone talks bad about any of you."

The members looked at each other and smiled secretively. After Seungri finished his part, the members left the room to me so they could have a quick dinner.

"You can listen to it again with Seungri's part," Jiyong told me. "Just try not to move or fix anything."

"YES SIR!" I said in English.

With that, they left for dinner. I watched a few videos on YouTube about cats before I remembered Jiyong's offer. Rolling over to the mixing station, I tapped on the spacebar like TOP did and sat there listening to the incomplete but almost perfect track. After the song was over, I left for the bathroom for a few minutes.

When I returned, I continued watching videos of cats. A few minutes later, the members returned and sat at their usual stations.

Jiyong asked me as he sat at the mixing station, "So how is it now?"

"It's even better now! Especially with that transition from TOP to..." I realized everyone fell silent and froze in their spot. They all stared at a screen in the mixing station.

"W-what is going on?" I asked, already knowing something terrible was about to happen.

Jiyong tapped the spacebar and began the song. Instantly, I knew the difference. The beat was off. The singing was not moving with the music. And worse of all, Seungri's part was missing. After it stopped playing, the members stared at me. What did I do?!

"Oh my God, Mindy," Jiyong whispered in disbelief. "What did you do to Bad Boy?"

Whatever I had done, I messed up at least three weeks of work on Bad Boy. I stared at all the stares from the members suddenly feeling like I didn't belong and that I created the biggest mess in humanity.

Great. Just great. Less than a day after I had supposedly stolen the rings, I screwed up Big Bang's work. This was going great. And it's been barely a week since I set foot onto Korea!

Jiyong couldn't suppress his disbelief and disappointment. "W-what did you do?" he asked me. I

felt tears well up at the corner of my eyes. "I-I don't know! I just pressed spacebar to listen to it like TOP oppa did and then I went to the bathroom afterwards. And then I came back. I didn't realize there was something wrong with the track until now!" I explained to him.

"What were you doing during the majority of the time we were gone?" Taeyang asked me. I looked down at the Mac, embarrassed.

"I-I was watching videos of cats..."

Daesung slumped onto the couch and put his head in his hands. Seeing the members discouraged, frustrated expressions made me blame myself even more.

Suddenly, Seungri spoke up, "It's not like it matters. I can record my part again in 15 seconds."

Jiyong shook his head. "It's not that, it's-"

"I mean that's pretty much how long my part is total," Seungri interrupted him.

Jiyong stared at the maknae. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Seungri shrugged and stared at his shoes. "I'm just saying my part in this song is so insignificant, it doesn't even matter if it's deleted."

TOP, frustrated, exclaimed, "You can't just say that!"

"Stay out of this," Jiyong blandly stated to TOP.

TOP was shocked. "Excuse me? I'm part of this band too. It's not always the 'G-Dragon crew'."

"Oh stop it, hyung," Seungri told TOP rolling his eyes. "You don't have any idea to what it's like swaying in the background behind you three!"

"You three?!" Taeyang exclaimed. "What relevance does this have with the song?" "

You always get the main singing part. Jiyong and TOP always gets the main rap," Seungri protested. "What are we left with?"

"We?" Jiyong narrowed his eyes.

"Daesung and I. I'm sick and tired of being one of the two less loved by VIPs. Even Mindy likes you three more!" Seungri uncrossed his arms and clenched his fists.

I couldn't believe this was happening. "No!" I protested. "I'm an unbiased VIP. I love all of you equally."

"Oh please," Seungri said sarcastically. "I see how you look at Jiyong or TOP." Seungri looked to Daesung. "Hyung, you have to admit you never liked being in the background."

Daesung looked as if he had been shot in the heart. "I-well...It's true we never get that much attention from fans as much as you hyungs."

Seungri started for the door. "I'm done here," he said. Then he turned to Daesung. "Are you coming with me, hyung?" as Daesung sat up to follow Seungri out, he sent me a guilty look.

When they had left, Jiyong groaned in frustration. "Those two! Speaking as if!" he exclaimed.

"You shouldn't have been so harsh on them," TOP told Jiyong.

Jiyong turned to look at him with a glare. "You shouldn't be the one talking! Seungri was talking about you too," Jiyong yelled at TOP.

"That's it!" TOP also shouted. "At least I never intended to make this band into 'G-Dragon and friends'! Being the leader doesn't mean you have to be the center of the spotlight."

"S-spotlight?" Jiyong stammered, unpleasantly surprised.

TOP grabbed his jacket. "I'm leaving." As quickly as everything had happened, he was gone. I couldn't keep the tears from breaking from their cage.

"Jiyong oppa..." I cried.

Taeyang took my shoulder. He looked into my eyes and sighed. "I think you should leave now," he told me.

I knew that I didn't belong in the recording studio at that time. I took my phone and wiped my eyes on my sleeve.

"I'm sorry, oppas," I told them as I walked out the door.

As I rode the elevator down to the Dance Studios for more practicing, I let out the tears. Not only did I mess up their work, I tore the band apart. What kind of monster was I?

My guilt pulled me down so much; I only practiced until 7:30 in which I went back to the Lee's apartment. They sat at the dining table to eat their dinner. When they say me, they were surprised.

Sang Ki said, "Oh, Mindy-sshi! We weren't expecting you to be home so early. We rarely ever see you now."

"Would you like some dinner?" Eun Mi offered standing up to get me a bowl of rice. I quickly told her not to and say down at the table with them.

"Training takes up most of the day and I hang out with the members afterwards," I told them halfheartedly. Eun Mi and Sang Ki looked at me with concerned expressions. "

Is there something wrong?" Eun Mi asked.

I threw up my hands in frustration. "You've seen the news and the Internet articles! I've been accused of committing a crime. Not only that, I caused an argument among the members today."

Sang Ki looked down at his rice. "You can't take all of those comments on the articles to heart. Most of them are just jealous of you to be close to the members."

"I don't want them to be jealous!" I replied. "I just want to be a VIP like them."

"Well, if you work for YG, you're never going to be a real VIP anymore," Sang Ki told me.

The thought of that sent tears to my eyes but I swallowed it back and stood up.

"Thank you for everything but I'll go in my room and prepare for bed early."

As I changed to comfortable black sweats and the GD&TOP sweater I ordered a whole ago, I couldn't help but feel guilty walking out of that room so rudely. This whole day was filled with guilt; from supposedly messing up the track to causing chaos among the members.

I laid on my bed and stared at the plain ceiling. What had I done? All I've done to Big Bang was creating chaos. I probably wouldn't be able to face any of them for a while.

A few minutes later, Eun Mi knocked and peeked into my room. "Mindy-sshi, there is someone calling you," she told me.

I followed out into the living room where I found TOP sitting in the couch and playing some toys with So Young. The scene was so adorable and touching, I felt myself clutch my wrist and bite back a smile.

When TOP noticed me, he looked up and smiled faintly. "Mindy!" he greeted. He stood up from the couch.

"Annyongseo, oppa. What are you doing here?" I asked suddenly feeling self-cautious in my sweats. He looked over to the Lee's cleaning up after dinner.

"Can we talk outside?" He slightly bowed to them and led the way out of the apartment onto an empty balcony. We both stared out into the night air for a while before TOP spoke again. "I'm sorry that happened, Mindy," he said.

"I should be the one apologizing. I created it." I shook my head and suddenly stopped focusing on the Seoul night air.

"Either way," he said, turning to me, "I still want to keep the promise we had on the first day we met you. Even if the members want to stab each other in the back, I still want to take you out to see Seoul."

I suddenly began to tear up. TOP, busy with all his idol work, thought of me and his idea on the first day. Now he was here to take me out.

"Oppa...I..." I stammered.

He hopped onto one leg. "Come on, Mindy. I want some time to let my mind breathe too."

I stared up at his brown, bright eyes that could give girls unexpected pregnancies. They shown such sadness I couldn't say no. I smiled up at him.

"Let me change first," I told him.

After I changed into my jeans and said goodbye to the Lee's, we embarked on our journey. While walking down the road of the neighborhood, TOP snatched my hand and interwove our fingers together.

He said smiling, "I hope I can take care of you well."

We rode the bus to downtown Seoul where a festival was taking place. Along a wide street were vendors selling goods from dried fish to Big Bang posters to jewelry. TOP remembered to where his thick and wide rimmed glasses and beanie today with the simple outfit of a Fubu hoodie and jeans. We both looked like two normal teenagers walking along with the crowd.

TOP made sure to grip my hand tight so I wouldn't drift away. I couldn't shake the feeling of nervousness of holding his hand. It just felt so surreal yet there he was pressed close to me because of the crowd. I didn't say much as we walked the first few feet lingering on a few stands.

TOP looked over at me, concerned. "What's on your mind?"

I glanced up at his bright brown eyes after laying down a chic handbag. Even if it was only a glance, I gave away what I really had on my mind. His face became solemn. "Please don't worry about that," he told me. "We've been working together for 6 years. Arguments are bound to happen."

A rushing boy slammed against me as he ran forward. TOP gripped my hand harder to steady me and sent a glare in the boy's direction. "Oppa...I started it. I ruined your work..."I muttered as we passed a vendor selling adorable earrings.

I didn't even find any interest in it due to the guilt that came back.

"No you didn't," he simply stated.

"What?"

"I'm sure as I was when you were accused of stealing the rings that you are innocent and did no harm to the song," TOP reassured. "The few minutes you were away? Someone could have gone in and messed up the song."

"Are you saying it could be one of the staff members again?" I asked shocked.

"We'll find out, won't we?" He pulled me over to a booth with clothing. "Let's just forget everything bad that had happened this week and enjoy the night."

TOP secretively took off his glasses to try on a cheap rip-off of sunglasses from Dior and posed in a sassy way. "Don't I look..." he switched to English. "...fabulous?"

I took a tiger shaped hat off the rack along with another pair of sunglasses to try on. "Your pronunciation of the 'f' in fabulous is admirable. But either way, you can not be as fabulous as me."

I could tell he rolled his eyes under the sunglasses. After putting the items back, we moved into other booths. In one stand, we found Big Bang related merchandise. TOP kept cracking up about how ridiculous Jiyong looked in a sticker set so of course, he bought it. We also found these plastic crowns for VIPs and bought it to show our Big Bang spirit. TOP wore it over his beanie, which made him absolutely adorable.

"We have to take a picture of you like that," I laughed. I pulled over to a photo booth station and we slipped into the booth.

"Oh dear," TOP complained.

"Just smile, oppa," I told him.

In the first photo, he obeyed and smiled with his arm around me. In the next, we both framed our faces with the V created by our hands. In the third photo, he pretended to choke me with his arm around my neck. On the last photo, TOP surprised me by brushing his lips against my cheek as the camera flashed. I took a step back in surprise.

"Woah, oppa," I stammered.

He winked. "I love all VIPs."

I shook my head in disbelief. "Not intimately, right?"

"You're just not the typical VIP," he stated.

We took the photos from the girl working on the photo booth. She mentioned how much TOP looked like TOP. We thanked her and quickly walked away before she could say or see anything else.

When we reached a jewelry booth, something caught my eye.

"Look oppa. There's only two left," I told him, holding up a thin blue bracelet with silver beads intertwined in the strings.

The lady selling it smiled at me, "There was only two originally. Unfortunately, it was handcrafted so the price is a bit high. No one is interested."

I bit lip and tried my luck. "How much?"

"10,000 won*," she answered. I put the bracelet back down, disappointed. It was expensive.

"Ah...it's so pretty," I muttered disappointed me.

Suddenly, TOP reached out the bracelet and handed the woman a 10,000 won note. "We'll take it," he said.

I stared up at him as he reached for my wrist so he could fasten it.

"Oppa!" I exclaimed.

He lightly punched my head and told me, "It's just 10,000 won. I'm loaded, Mindy." I sighed. "Idols..."

I still smiled at him. "Thank you so much, oppa."

We continued on for a few more vendors before a thought crossed my mind. We stopped before a vendor selling tiny toy robots in which TOP became totally absorbed in.

"Hey, Seunghyun oppa," I called him.

"Wow..." He acted being surprise. "You usually never call me Seunghyun."

He kept his eyes locked on a specific toy though.

I laughed. "I think I saw something back there I want to check again. It'll be quick."

"Alright," he agreed. "I'll be right here. Don't get lost."

I hurried back to the vendor where TOP bought the expensive bracelet. I cheered to myself to find the second one was still there. The lady was surprised to see me again.

"Aigoo, did something happen with the bracelet?" she asked me.

"Anniyeo," I smiled, showing it on my wrist. "I just want to take the second one."

I pulled 5,000 won out of my pocket and then 3,000 won. That was it. I didn't have enough money for the bracelet. My face fell.

"Sorry but I don't have enough money," I told her. I was about to walk away when she stopped me and held out the bracelet.

"I'll take it for 8,000 won. It's cute that you want to match with your boyfriend," she said.

I was about to object to her prediction but decided to leave it. "Thank you so much!" I told her and hurried back to TOP while slipping the bracelet into my pocket.

When I reached TOP, he was taking a wrapped box from the seller. When he saw me, he pointed to the box and smiled. I returned his smile.

"So where did you go?" he asked as we continue along.

"Oh nothing," I replied innocently. He looked at me suspiciously but didn't say anything back.

When we reached the food vendors, he made me try so many desserts I was about to burst. At 11, he walked me to the bus stop to escort me home.

"Do you think Jiyong is still at the YG building?" I asked as I looked up at the building in the distance.

"Probably... fixing that so-" TOP stopped and looked at me.

I sighed and looked down at my shoes. "I think you should go talk to him," I told him.

This time TOP sighed. "Yeah, I need to. I don't like fighting with the members, especially Jiyong since he has to worry so much about Big Bang."

"I could go home by myself," I told him.

TOP looked down at me concerned. "Are you sure?"

I nodded and said, "I had a good time. Thank you." He pulled me in for a hug.

"Me too," he answered, still holding me. He pressed a kiss onto the top of head.

Just as he was about to walk away, I called him back, suddenly remembering. I pulled out the bracelet and reached for TOP's wrist.

"But it's yours," he protested.

I held up my wrist the show the one he bought me. He looked surprised for a second and then happy. After I had fastened the bracelet onto his wrist, we exchanged one last glance and then turned separate ways.

[*10,000=about $7-8]


	8. Chapter 8

I woke up earlier than my usual rise time due to a text sent by Daesung: "_Wanna come to the YG building for an hour of workout?" _Half of me wanted to place my phone back on the bedside table and return to snuggling in my warm, comfortable blankets but the other half told me it was a great idea to work out with Daesung. Plus, I might even get to see his abs. With that thought, I threw off the covers and got ready in the matter of 5 minutes.

As I walked to the bus station, Daesung told me to meet up with him at a cafe near YG. When I did, we each bought a cup of coffee and walked back to the building. The sun was barely up.

"You look like a zombie, Mindy," Daesung told me as he pulled open the building's door for me.

I stepped into the main lobby. "Well, I had a long day and night. I didn't go to sleep until 12 since my parents called."

"Aww...I feel had for making you do this," Daesung said staring at his shoes as we stepped into the elevator.

"No! I want to! I think it's a good idea to build my strength for dancing."

I watched his face lift slightly. But it had been a while since I've seen him smile for real. Ever since...I shook it from my head. It's been months ago. If Daesung was fine, I would be fine.

As we stepped out onto the gym floor, Daesung nodded his agreement. "I talked to Joon Tae and he said it's advised you build your strength."

Daesung set me up on a treadmill next to his. He programmed it so that it would speed up as I ran on it. I constantly looked over to Daesung as he stared at the wall in front of him and concentrated on working out. My eyes traveled down to his leg muscles that were flexed. Before I knew it, the machine sped up and I was flying off of the treadmill.

"Oh! Mindy!" Daesung exclaimed pressing a button to stop his treadmill. He rushed over to me to help me up as I groaned, knowing I damaged my tailbone.

"What happened?" he asked laughing.

"O-oh. I didn't know! The machine sped up," I answered.

I stopped saying anything when I realized the smile on Daesung's face. It looked so familiar on his face, the joyful, real smile of Kang Daesung. It has been such a long time since I've seen the smile on his face. Daesung realized I was staring at his face when we stood up.

"What is it?" he asked as his face fell.

"O-oh, well..." I stammered. "It's been such a long time since I've seen you smile so brightly..."

"Oh..." he answered suddenly looking very solemn.

I gripped my face. "Oh my goodness. I never meant to indirectly bring it up," I told him, knowing he was thinking about the same thing as I.

"It's alright," he answered gripping my shoulder with a firm warm hand.

We continued the treadmill without another word. The next thing we did was different. He bench-pressed while I did curl-ups on a machine.

Suddenly, Daesung said, "I'm sorry VIPs aren't seeing me smile like I did before. It's just that...it's not the same."

"We just miss our smiling angel. But we all keep faith that you'll come back," I answered painfully as I felt the pain in my stomach area.

"It was just too crazy. I didn't know where to turn," he answered, setting down a weight carefully. "I still don't know what to do now."

"Just talk about it. Find someone who will listen to you no matter what," I offered him.

"I'm scared they will criticize me," Daesung answered sadly as he stretched out his arms.

"I won't," I told him. "That's for sure."

Daesung ended up telling me about how surreal everything felt for him when he had gotten in the accident. He saw what has happened but it looked as if it came from a movie seen. He couldn't organize thoughts. I listened to every word he said, only replying when he asked for one.

By 6:50, Daesung and I were sitting against the wall and panting. It wasn't until a little later that I realized Daesung was indeed crying and the water droplets were not from sweat. I pulled his head onto my shoulder and gripped his hand tightly, afraid to say anything.

What would I have done if I was accused of something as big as supposedly killing someone? It was scary and even with plenty people around you, it was up to yourself to fix yourself. I knew what it was like to be accused of a small crime like stealing. But compared to Daesung...I was astounded at how Daesung was still moving on with life.

Since I had to get to training, we both washed up a bit and made our way to the Dance Studios. Before we stepped into the Dance Studio, I stopped Daesung.

"Oppa, I know I can't help you with this even if I tried," I told him as tears filled my eyes. "But I would do anything to see you smile again."

He froze and whispered, "Don't cry."

In one swift movement, Daesung wiped the tears from my cheeks and pulled me in for a hug.

He whispered in my ear, "I will always smile for you."

I felt the corners of my lips lift up and when I pulled back to see the angel's face, I found that he too was smiling.

The workout in the morning with Daesung really helped me. Joon Tae was astounded at progress and promised me I would be ready by Sunday. When he called for a 15 minute break, Seungri came into the room as if on cue and took a seat next to me as I drank from my bottle and stretched.

"Annyongseo, oppa," I greeted him.

He began instantly, "The way I acted last night was unacceptable. I didn't mean anything bad I said to you. And I'm sorry for making you worry for us." "No problem."

I smiled at him as I stretched out a cramped leg muscle. "As long as you guys are okay."

But Seungri wasn't finished. "It's not like I don't like the hyungs or something but it always seems like there are more people who like them whether it's looks or personality. They always beat me."

"Oppa, I can absolutely relate to that. I was once the underdog to my own friends. And it was extremely difficult to tolerate it."

"So what did you do?" he asked his shoes.

"Walk away," I told him. His face suddenly changed. "But that's running away from my problems. Now, we still have a grudge on each other. We should have talked."

"So...is that what you want me to do? Talk to them?" Seungri questioned.

I realized that I was giving advice to the THE Seungri of Big Bang. Then again, I practically went on a date with TOP. I shook the thought from my head.

"If you can," I told him. "You guys are a band. If you break up, we VIPs will kill each other and then you guys."

"Then what do I do after I tell them?" he asked.

"Tell them what's been on your mind. If they really care, they would fix it," I answered. I drank some more water from my bottle. I laid a hand on his arm. "Look, Jiyong oppa is a great person. He will never hurt you. Maybe TOP will but that's a different story. Just tell him."

Seungri sighed and stood up as I followed suit. "Thanks, Mindy," he told me.

"Please don't argue anymore," I said as he walked out of the dance studio.

Joon Tae continued practice with me until lunch where I resumed practicing even without Joon Tae. My body was sore and tired and worn out but I still fought on, practicing for perfection. I finally sat down to have a granola bar after 20 minutes of my lunch gone due to practicing.

With a loud burst, the five members of Big Bang came in laughing and talking to each other as last night never happened.

Jiyong came up to me. "Sorry, Mindy, for being so harsh."

I was about to answer but ended up coughing and spitting bits of granola all over Jiyong's face. He froze. The members behind him cracked up. Although I felt sorry for Jiyong, I still felt happy everything would be alright again. Well...maybe.

The members stayed in the dance studio to watch me run over the song once with Joon Tae. Seungri tried to impress me by dancing along to the song in the background but ended up looking bingu.

After I finished, I turned to the members for their comments. Jiyong smiled to the members as he said, "Mindy puts so much energy to it. You should try to aim for the energy like Mindy's."

The four members looked shocked as I laughed at their surprise. Jiyong turned to me this time. "But Mindy...since you're singing at the same time, I think you should try to balance out the energy." I nodded, acknowledging his criticism.

"I think your moves are really smooth and look effortless," Taeyang said. "That's a good thing to pull off. It makes you look like a pro."

"But you're not gonna be as great as Taeyang and me until you've been through at least 3 years of practice," Seungri told me.

Daesung and Taeyang sent him puzzled looks.

TOP sweetly smiled and showed two thumbs up. "Much better than me in my trainee days."

"She's better than you now, hyung," Daesung said. Suddenly, he cowered as if he expected a slap from TOP. TOP didn't hit him but he sent Daesung a glare that was equivalent to a slap. Jiyong stood up with Taeyang and Seungri.

"We're going to go to an interview. We'll be back before 6. And we'll be practicing for the YG concert in the rehearsal room," Jiyong told me.

Daesung and TOP started after them but stopped to lay a hand on my shoulder. As TOP waved goodbye to me while walking out of the room, a hint of a blue bracelet peeked out from his sleeve. The corner of my lips curled up as a warm feeling spread over my cheeks. TOP was wearing the bracelet I bought him.

Hye Ri stepped into the room and began scolding me, "What are you doing? Joon Tae told me you were stretching! Get your lazy feet moving and start stretching."

I couldn't keep a smile off of my face as I asked her, "What does stretching have to do with singing, sunbae?"

"Don't get me started on the wonders of stretching your diaphragm and lungs." After she laid down her bag, she stared at the silly grin still on my face. "What's with the smile?"

I shrugged. "I think it's because I spit my lunch onto Jiyong oppa's face..."

"You did what?!" she exclaimed. I skipped over to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"Why don't we get a little singing down?" I suggested cheerfully.

"Hye Ri shook her head. "What is wrong with this girl?" she muttered.

We started my vocal lessons. After 2 hours, Hye Ri threw up her hands. "I don't know what to do with you anymore!" she exclaimed.

I lowered the mic from my lips. "Dammit. Did I pronounce sing the wrong note again? I always screw up at the end of the song..."

"No!" she said. "I don't know what to do to make you better than you already are."

I couldn't believe the words that came out of her mouth. Seeing my expression, she giggled. "I'm going to go now."

"Wait," I exclaimed. "What am I going to do for the next 3 hours? The members aren't coming back until then."

She looked at her watch. "Jae Min is coming in about 20 minutes to take you shopping." Honestly, the words coming out her mouth made no sense to me. At all.

"Excuse me?"

Hye Ri grabbed her bag. "You honestly think you can stand for evaluation in front of the president in those clothes?"

I looked down at my sweats and slightly ripped tank top. That was true. But that didn't mean I had no decent clothes.

As if reading my mind, Hye Ri added, "Of course you have suitable clothes but...clothes idols wear is a bit different."

With that, she left me to wonder why on earth Jae Min would agree to go shopping with me.

Still not understanding why Jae Min would take me our shopping, I turned on Somebody to Love again and began practicing with the dance. Five minutes before Jae Min was due to arrive, I smoothed out my hair, wiped my sweat on a towel, and drank a bit of water. Stylists were the type to judge you on how you looked.

Seven minutes later, Jae Min walked in sporting a gorgeous spring dress and a designer hand bag. She smelled like expensive perfume against the stench of sweat in the room. When she saw me, she smiled sweetly and held out her hand for a shake.

"It's nice to meet you again, Mindy-sshi," she greeted politely.

"Yup, because the last time we talked it didn't go so well," I answered. I didn't know what was up with me but I was speaking so informally with her. Even so, I didn't feel guilty for some reason.

Her face fell. "Omo, I'm so sorry I accused you like that," she apologized scrunching her eyebrows in a pretty way. "I was so stressed because Tiffany and Co. would have been so mad if we lost them."

"It's alright." I smiled trying to be polite. "So shopping is it?"

She clapped her hands suddenly. "Oh yes! How fun will this be!"

As I grabbed my bag and sweater, I asked her, "So...umm...do I have to pay for all of this...?"

"Anniyeo. It's all on the president." We walked out of the room to the elevators.

"Really?" I asked. "Why?"

"I guess he really wants you to be an idol," she answered shrugging in pretty way. Everything she did was in a pretty way.

On the way to a shopping mall, we discussed the concept of my evaluation day. Punk rock? Preppy rock? Preppy? Cute? School girl? All the suggestions she offered were so cliche and overused. I wanted something fresh and clean.

"How about we decide there?" I asked her.

She looked offended. "Do you not like my suggestions?"

"No no! They're great but I think they're overused, that's all," I answered. She still seemed to be unhappy.

We reached the mall and hopped a whole mess of stores buying random clothing items. Although it was hard to admit, I missed shopping with a girl friend and enjoyed most of the time with Jae Min except when she would randomly spout an insult on my fashion.

After the tenth store, I came up with a concept. "Crazy casual," I told her when we sat down at a table in a cafe. I pulled out a pair of black ripped jean shorts, black laced boots, and a jacket with rainbow colored sleeves in cheetah print from the shopping bags.

A smile spread on Jae Min's lips as she nodded. "I...I think that's a great idea actually."

She reached for my hair and pulled it back into a high ponytail. "Then we can have your hair back like this with fake glasses."

I nodded in agreement. "That's it!"

We sipped onto a coffee and discussed a bit about makeup. Jae Min excused herself to the bathroom and left me alone at the table to daydream of how to do my makeup on that day.

Suddenly I realized a group of teenage girls standing near me, whispering obscure words. I only caught a bit. _VIP. Bigbang. That girl. Thief. Criminal._ I realized they were talking about me. And I made the mistake of turning to their direction.

When our eyes met, they went on full attack mode. They screamed nonsense at me. Why did I get so much attention from the members? Who was I? Why was I shopping with a YG stylist? How? What? Who? They blamed me for stupid things from TOP having cancer to Daesung shaving his head. It's crazy how many rumors fans can come up in such a short period of time.

I tried to defend myself. But one girl got so worked up, she shoved me off of my chair. My feet got caught into a leg and the chair tumbled on top of me, hitting me on the cheek and shoulder. I felt pain shoot through my body.

When I got up, I was ready to punch the crap out of the girl. Instead I found that Jae Min had already taken care of it with her demanding stare. When they were gone, she turned to me and her eyes widened.

"You're bleeding!" she exclaimed. I reached up to touch my cheek and found blood. It didn't sting that much so I was sure I was okay.

"It's fine," I told her. I reached for a napkin to dap the wound. She helped me wholeheartedly.

On the car ride back to the YG Building, Jae Min rambled on and on about how crazy VIPs could be. I tuned her out. All that infested my mind was the words they screamed at me. Even if I couldn't process all the words they said, I knew that those VIPs were filled with hatred...for me.

Jae Min walked me up to the rehearsal rooms with my shopping bag in case I die or pass out because of the cut on my face or something. Either way, she acted much nicer than that day when she wanted me in jail. She even asked me to call her Unni.

When we stepped into the room, we called out a greeting. The YG family barely started and was just wandering around mingling.

When Jiyong spotted us, he raised his eyebrows but came up to us. "What's going on?" he asked eyeing the shopping bags.

"We had some sisterly time," Jae Min answered cheerfully.

"We only went shopping," I answered careful to be polite.

Jiyong's eyes widened when he noticed the cut on my cheek. His hand instinctively went up to touch it. I took a step back, knowing it would sting if it did.

"What happened?" he demanded.

Jae Min answered before me, "Crazy VIPs attacked her. It's fortunate I was there to stop it." Jiyong kept his eyes on me. "You need to get something for that."

Taeyang came over to me. "Mindy, that looks terrible."

Jae Min jumped in almost nervously. "I think Mindy-sshi will be fine. After getting up, it looked like she could've killed that girl!"

Taeyang shook his head. "I'll take care of it, Jiyong. You should start organizing the set list," Taeyang said. Jiyong nodded but stared at me.

"I'll be fine," I told him. He smiled, reassured, and turned to organizing the set list. Taeyang looked to Jae Min who looked nervous all of the sudden. "Jae Min-sshi, aren't you going to your parents today?"

She sputtered, "Y-yes. I think I'll...be going now. Here's your shopping bags."

She handed me my bags and then said goodbye to the people in the room. Before stepping out, she looked back anxiously but left. Taeyang led me over to a couch and used water and a towel to clean up the smeared blood. The cut had stopped bleeding anyway. After doing that, he slapped a bandage on it. The whole time he asked me about how it all happened. I told him but I left out the part where the fans screaming insults at me.

"This is an issue," he muttered.

Suddenly someone called him since it was the beginning of rehearsal. He looked over at me once and then took a seat next to Seungri. No one else seemed to notice to me but it made sense since they were all so absorbed in their work. I watched in awe at their performance. My eyes traveled from Gummy to Minzy to CL then to Se7en. Although I felt as if I didn't belong, I still enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere of the room.

When the singers stood up to take a break, Se7en made his way over to me. He held out his hand. "It's nice to meet you, Mindy. I've heard lots about you."

I expected the singers to ignore me since I was just a trainee yet here he was, the Kpop prince, Se7en. Here he was ready to take my hand. Suddenly I felt like a belonged in YG, that maybe this was the turning point in my life.


	9. Chapter 9

I stood up and bowed to him as I took Se7en's hand. He gestured for me to take a seat and he sat next to me.

"So how is training?" he asked taking a sip from his water.

"It's going great so far. I think I'll be able to showcase by Sunday," I answered.

"Oh really? I would like to step in on one of your practices to give you a few tips. Is that okay?" Se7en offered.

"Oh, of course!" I agreed. Suddenly, his time became serious. "Look, Mindy-sshi. I've been hearing a lot about the VIPs and in addition to what happened today." He pointed to the bandage of my cheek. "Don't think too much about it. You might get the wrong idea. They are all just jealous."

I looked at him suddenly unhappy. I wanted them to think of me as a VIP, just like them but in these circumstances I didn't think that would happen.

"I try," I told him, "but it's hard not the think that I'm just a burden to everyone around me."

"Actually, I think something's changed about those guys ever since you came here." Se7en leaned back I the couch. "Something about them seems more livelier. Like they are alive." He paused for a second. "They didn't have the response they wanted with their comeback. I think it's been bringing them down since then."

"What happened with Tonight?" I asked, shocked they didn't get the attention they wanted.

Se7en widened his eyes. "Oh no, they did an extraordinary job with the comeback. But they just thought they could dig up the lost VIPs from long ago."

"Some of them became anti-VIPs right?" I asked softly.

Se7en shook his head. "All idols go through it but there's no denying it hurts a lot."

I looked down at my shoes suddenly in despair. "I used to be an anti-VIP." Se7en curiously looked over at me in question. "I thought k-pop was stupid and insulted them in general. I didn't realize again how awesome Big Bang was until 6 months ago when I rediscovered them," I told him.

Se7en smiled at me. "Everything needs a break."

"Speaking of breaks, it's time to get back to rehearsing," TOP said walking up to Se7en. He bid me a goodbye and went to his rehearsal seat. TOP stared down at me. I couldn't help but feel incredible intimidated.

"I think I'm going to go practice more of my song," I told him.

"Sorry we couldn't take you out today," TOP said. "Maybe tomorrow."

"It's okay," I smiled.

Before I was able to bid everyone a farewell, he reached for my cut. "I don't understand how that could just happen...I know does fact it's more than a coincidence," he muttered.

"It's okay, oppa,"'I laughed. "What's done is done."'

He sighed, gave me a hug, and sat down at his rehearsal seat. Before stepping out of the room, I bid everyone a farewell.

While going down the elevators, what TOP said started to send shivers down my spine. It was true. Out of all places, a group of VIPs were there where Jae Min and I were. My heart skipped a beat as another thought entered my head. Jae Min...what was even more than a coincidence was the fact that she was there right after I had gotten hurt...

I shook the thought from my head. Jae Min shouldn't have anything to do with the attacking VIPs. It just wouldn't add up. But as I stepped into the dark dance studio, I couldn't deny the biting suspicion that even if it was an small amount, Jae Min had something to do with it.

I practiced hard into the night. Only did I stop when I had to take a drink of power water. I didn't realize I was starving until I took a break at 8. I took out a bag of Veggie Sticks and laid on the hardwood floor munching on them. It was a lame excuse of a dinner but I had to deal. Evaluation day was right around the corner and I couldn't afford to disappoint Appa YG or the members...especially the Bigbang members.

After finishing the snack, I started the song again. I danced and sang to it the way I learned it but...something didn't seem right. I felt like I lacked something. As I ran over some footwork of the song, Taeyang entered the room. I stopped dancing to greet him.

"What are you doing here, oppa? I thought you were rehearsing," I asked him.

"The president told me you were still down here practicing so I went to check on you," Taeyang answered.

I sat down the floor and took a sip of water. He joined me.

"How does he know I've been practicing?"

"He has cameras," Taeyang answered. I almost choked on my water. Did that mean he saw me laying on the ground eating? Taeyang chuckled. "You didn't know that?"

"W-well, I think saw it once on YGTV but I've watched so many videos of you guys..." I answered.

Taeyang raised his eyebrows. "What...what kind of videos do you watch of us?"

My face grew warm. "There are different types of VIPs."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked startled.

"Let's not talk about it," I told him. "I kind of need help and it's great timing that you come down here."

"So what's up?" he asked.

I stood up and said, "There's this part of the song where I am doing what I'm taught but...it doesn't look right." I showed him while singing the part.

When he saw it, he breathed an "ohh.." and stood up next to me. "What you do is..." he showed me. I followed him but it still didn't look right.

I groaned. "I don't know what's wrong with me! I got the singing down..."

Taeyang stepped behind me and laid his hands on my shoulder. "Relax. Just follow me," he said.

He showed me how to position my arms and legs using his hands. I blushed under his touch but obeyed. We ran it over a few times and I improved but I still wasn't satisfied.

"It's just something about it that doesn't seem natural," I told Taeyang.

"Well, you need to your own character into it," he told me.

I looked up at him with "really" eyes. "How?!" I exclaimed.

"You have to find it by yourself...I mean TOP eventually found it," Taeyang told me.

"That guy still doesn't know how to dance," I chuckled.

"True. But he has his own style," Taeyang advised. He looked down at his watch. "I have to go back to rehearsal. I'll see you, Mindy. Work hard!"

I bid him a farewell and turned on the music again after he left. Instead of dancing to the song, I tried whacky stuff from a Tae Kwon Do kick to the worm. Even then, the energy didn't flow through me. I played GD&TOP to just sit back and relax. Yet I found myself bobbing to the music and clapping and being incredibly weird. I stopped when I remembered Appa YG watching but it was then that I realized an idea for my dance routine.

I didn't go home until 11 to practice my new style to the dance routine. I was tired and frustrated that I ended up not even close to perfecting it. I had a day left. I got up early in the morning the next day to work out at the gym. I found myself more energized doing so. I ran into TOP and Jiyong who were also working out.

"Oh, Mindy," TOP said as he glanced over at me from his treadmill. "How's your morning?"

I smiled at the both of them running together and replied, "It's been fine. I just need to get some energy."

"It's a good thing you know to work out once in a while," Jiyong said stopping his machine to sit down at another muscle developing machine. "It will really help with your breathing techniques while singing and dancing."

I began on the treadmill. TOP handed me a water bottle and then sat down next to Jiyong to begin his workout. We all exercised in silence for a while. After 45 minutes of running, I looked back to Jiyong and TOP and found myself once again flying off of the treadmill.

They rushed over to help me up. But it was all I could do to not fall back down again. While exercising, TOP has secretly slipped off his T-shirt to reveal a rock-hard chest and hints of abs. I tried my best to not look at his bare skin but it didn't prove well. I ended up falling again.

"Ohh, what's wrong, Mindy? Do you feel faint?" TOP asked, helping me up again.

Jiyong who was obviously shirtless too elbowed TOP with a silly grin and gestured with his eyes at TOP...topless.

I couldn't say anything. My heart was stuck in my throat.

TOP blushed. "Oh, I could put my shirt back on if it makes you uncomfortable," he stammered. I shook my head furiously.

I said, "I think I just need to sit down."

I took a seat on whatever was behind me, which was an unstable bench and ended up on the floor again. The two reached down to help me up but I held up my hands to show I'm okay.

"I think I'll just stay down here."

TOP laughed and sat down next to me. "I know it's weird. I just usually don't show it to the public," he told me.

"What am I then?" I looked over at him but ended going down to his abs again so I looked away. "Oh my gosh."

He reached for his shirt and pulled it on. "Better?" he asked.

I looked at TOP disappointed. "Does that mean I don't get to see it ever again?"

He winked at me as he got up. "Not necessarily."

Then he went over to continue working out.

Jiyong whispered into my ear, "You are sooooo special."

"I don't think I'll look at him the same way ever again." I laid my face into my hands.

Eventually, TOP did enough bingu things to get me looking at him the same way again but nothing will ever change the fact that Choi Seunghyun has a hot body and I got an exclusive.

By 7, I washed up, said goodbye to the pair, and made my way to the dance studio. Joon Tae was stretching and I joined him.

"Last day of practice," he told me.

"I know, sunbae." I smiled at him though. "And I think I got a great idea. I don't know if I got enough time to practice it."

He stood up. "I have faith in you. Let's see it."

With his smile, I felt like I could actually impress Appa YG enough to be...in the YG family.

Practice. Practice. Drink water. Practice. Snack. Digest. Practice. Practice. Practice. Breathe. Practice. 11 hours of practice and then my trainers go home. I stay behind to practice even more. Tomorrow was evaluation day and everything I did seemed to be only half okay. Why was that? Like usual, I skipped dinner and ran it over again, doing the entire dance routine.

Worried, the Big Bang came to check on me. They also had rehearsal for their concert but took their time off to say hi.

"You work hard, Mindy," Daesung told me. We all sat in a row against one of the mirrored walls. "Maybe a little too hard."

"I see sweat running down your face. That's not always a good sign," Seungri pointed out. I quickly wiped it away, embarrassed.

"Are you drinking water?" Taeyang asked me. I pointed to the pile of empty water bottles near my bag.

"Water is basically the only thing in my stomach right now," I told him.

"Okay, good. When you throw up, it won't be that hard to clean up," he replied.

"What?!" I exclaimed, scared.

Jiyong laughed, "He's just saying that you work too hard and need to eat more."

"We barely see you down at the cafeteria. It's not healthy to starve yourself," TOP told me.

I scooted up from the wall and turned around to face the members. "Look," I told them, "I feel very thankful that you all care about me so much. But I have to direct your attention to your pre-debut years. You all worked until your butts fell off and didn't stopped until perfection. Compared to what I'm doing now...it's nothing."

"It's not nothing if you die," TOP said.

"Okay, oppa. That's a little too extreme," I told him. He held up his hands in defense. "I'm not going to die and I'm going to work until perfection."

I stood up to start the music again but was overwhelmed by a sudden hug from Seungri. Soon enough, all of the members joined him. I couldn't breathe for a second. "Omo..." I muttered. Then I sighed happily. "I love you guys."

They let go and said one last word of praise, "Fighting!"

And I started practicing again.

Truthfully, I had lied to the members. I was tired. I was tired of practicing, practicing, and practicing. My muscles were tired. My vocal chords were straining. My face was red from sweating so much. Somehow, I couldn't keep my eyes open. I laid down onto the floor and closed my eyes and started taking deep breaths. I stayed like that for fifteen minutes. I tried to get up but I couldn't. I plain out couldn't.

So instead, I practiced the beats and notes for the song laying down. Suddenly, the members burst into the room with bright faces. Seeing me on the floor, fear passed through their eyes. Taeyang, Daesung, and Jiyong rushed to my side while Seungri and TOP took my towel and bottle to create a wet towel. I sat up to show I was okay but they still looked worried. Seungri pressed the towel against my face and dabbed into around my temples gently.

"I'm fine." I told them. They all looked at me uncertainly.

"Mindy...no more practicing," Jiyong demanded. His voice was strict but caring at the same time.

"But-"

"No, Mindy," Taeyang told me.

"It's the night before your big day. It's better to get a good night's rest than work until you pass out," Daesung said.

I didn't argue. Pajamas and a bed sounded really good. I was about to pick up my things but Taeyang and Jiyong took them. TOP helped my slip on my jacket.

"Aren't you guys supposed to be rehearsing?" I asked as we walked out of the room.

"Yup..." Jiyong said.

I was so confused. "Uhh..."

"Oh, yeah. We snuck away," TOP answered.

"Sorry, I'm a bad boy," Taeyang said in English.

Instead of taking the bus, we decided to walk the way back to the Lee's apartment to clear our minds. It was nice. The summer air was cool and brisk. The members shared memories as we walked along. I stayed quiet and listened.

"Ahh...and then Daesung hyung switched the cup with TOP hyung. Stupid move," Seungri said.

"He sleeps outside in the cold. Kudos to Daesung," Jiyong commented.

"He saved me," TOP said, hugging Daesung.

"Didn't matter," Taeyang said. "We came inside anyway."

"What did you do with your friends, Mindy?" Seungri asked.

I didn't say anything and shrugged, embarrassed to say what was the truth.

"Oh you must have done something," Daesung insisted.

They all looked at me expectantly. I looked down at my shoes. "I didn't do anything with my friends. I don't really have close friends." Their faces fell. I covered it up with a smile. "It doesn't mean I have zero friends. I have lots. Just not close ones."

"What happened...? It sounded like you had close ones before," Taeyang asked carefully.

I laughed nervously. "You guys really want to know a stupid story of my past life."

Jiyong patted my shoulder. "We want to know as much as possible from you. You're coming into YG and everything."

I rolled my eyes. "Mhmm, because you can guarantee that right?"

"Did something happen?" Seungri asked, curious. TOP smacked him in the face.

"You can't straight out ask her like that."

I laughed as I laid a hand on TOP's arm. "It's okay. The story is long though."

"We're in for any story," Daesung said. So I told them.

Back in high school, I had two very close friends. We would do everything together. By senior year, we talked about having plans on living together in North Cal since we would be all going to Stanford or Berkeley. That talk bothered me. I didn't want to live with them. I wanted my college life to be separate. I disagreed with them but kept it to myself.

"Did they even get accepted into those schools?" TOP asked.

"Nope..."I answered. "Good thing, though. If one of them went, I wouldn't be able to function."

Slowly through senior year, they drifted away. Every time they hung out together or with someone else, it broke my heart because they disregarded me. Wanting them to feel the hurt they caused me, I hung out with popular kids to shove it in their face. Soon enough, I ended all connections with them. It wasn't worth it anyway. Friendships like ours weren't meant to last. After graduation and the beginning of my freshman year at Stanford, I swore to myself to not get attached to anyone because I will end disappointed again. I was fine mostly alone. I worked harder and achieved higher things by myself.

"But I think I'm starting to break my no attachment rule..." I ended.

"And why is that," Jiyong asked with a forlorn expression just like the other members.

"I think I'm getting attached to you oppas," I replied. I saw that it took everything in them to not tackle me with a bear hug. "I never thought we would get anywhere past idol and fan. I thought I would see you, obsess over you, and then walk away. I never thought it would come this far..."

"Mindy..." Daesung said.

"I don't know...You five really brought the real meaning of friends with you." I slipped my hand in my pocket and smiled. "Corny, I know."

When we reached the apartment, Jiyong stopped me from going inside so easily.

"Mindy, we really are so thankful you suddenly popped into our lives," Jiyong told me.

"Out of the sea of VIPs, you ended up being the one to stand out," Daesung continued.

"You are so unique and special. You are no typical VIP," Seungri added.

"We hope to work with you for years to come. Side by side. And most of all, the always be your closest friends," Taeyang said.

"We have no doubt you'll be loved my the president. There's just that special thing about you. And lastly," TOP concluded, "saranghae."

"No," Jiyong corrected. "WE love you."

This time I couldn't hold my urge to run into Jiyong's arms. Instantaneously, I was surrounded by the love the greatest people on earth.


	10. Chapter 10

Usually, I would freak out before going to bed and end up wandering the apartment until 5 in the morning. But with a warm cup of tea from Eun Mi and the sweet words from the members, I fell asleep instantly.

I woke up at 8 this time since my appointment with Appa YG wasn't until 11. I pulled on the planned outfit and made my way to the building with a rapidly beating heart. Jae Min was at the styling room. She was waiting for me with a wide grin.

"Ahh...you look adorable. Come sit and I'll do your hair and makeup," she greeted.

I obediently took a seat in front of the dressing table and let her brush through my long dark brown hair. By the time she finished with my hair, I learned over 50 new things about her and my hair was high up in a ponytail and was messily curled. It was a good idea. My hair wouldn't be able to get in my face when I dance.

"How would you liked your makeup?" she asked, holding a foundation brush.

"As simple as possible," I answered smiling at her.

"Very true. Your natural beauty should indeed shine today," she answered.

She began with a thin layer of foundation and worked her way around my face. Even if it was simple, it took at least 30 minutes. I noticed a hint of violet eyeshadow when she finished. It brought out the color in my eyes and the hairstyle. These stylists could work miracles.

"Alrighty! We are almost done!" she exclaimed.

I looked at her, puzzled. "What's next?"

She pulled out a pair of black-rimmed glasses from a cloth pouch. "These are the glasses TOP used at a music festival not too long ago. He wanted you to wear it today," Jae Min said.

She handed it to me to put on. It fit my face shape and made the overall outfit even more crazy natural.

I stood up and bowed to Jae Min. "Thank you, Unni...for helping me," I said.

Jae Min grabbed my shoulders. "My dongseng, listen." Her mascara-thick eyelashes batted prettily. "Whatever you do today, do it with confidence. And show that you really want it." I nodded. She smiled confidently and pulled me in for a hug. "Okay, good luck."

After thanking her again, I made my way up to the dance studio. I stepped into the studio and was met by a loud "woah". The members assembled on the seats against the wall. When they saw me in my outfit, they stood up.

"Annyongseo, oppa," I greeted.

Daesung clapped blindly. "Wah~ You look stunning!" he exclaimed. Jiyong just bit his lip in a smile and shook his head.

I took a seat on the floor to stretch out.

"Mindy...I'm so proud of you," Seungri said. "You look exactly like an idol right now."

I laughed. "I'm not an idol until I dye my hair blue."

"That's actually a really good idea," TOP said. Jiyong, Taeyang, and Daesung stared at him in disbelief.

"Don't worry so much. You're going to do amazing. I can tell the president will be so impressed," Taeyang told me when he turned back to me.

Jiyong came over to me and squatted to my level. "One piece of advice, Mindy." He smiled at me. "Smile."

"And watch your breath," Daesung added in. Jiyong rolled his eyes. I stood up and Jiyong followed suit.

"I honestly feel the greatest today. I think I can do it. I can make it," I told them.

As if on cue, Appa YG and my trainers came in. We quickly greeted them. Appa YG wore a different hat. This time it was dark green. He sat down at an empty chair and crossed his legs, ready to tell me to start.

Suddenly, the ponytail felt as if it was pulling at my scalp and my skin itched under the makeup. Staring at Appa YG's beady eyes, I felt sweat in my palms.

"Before we start, I would just like to say, " Appa YG said, "this evaluation isn't just based on your performance today. I've watched you practice for the past week so I will also judge on that."

"Yes, sir," I said confidently smiling. Even if it felt like a migraine from the ponytail, I still was able to pull on an act. Hye Ri smiled at me supportingly. "I will began now," I stated.

The members cheered for me and Appa YG smirked at them. Joon Tae began the music for me. I took a deep breath and began with the mic in my hand. The members cheered me on the entire song. With my refurbished dance routine, I incorporated each member's signature move. For example, for TOP's part, I preformed the move where he danced sideways. For Taeyang, I incorporated a dougie-like style.

The members and Appa YG enjoyed it immensely but I didn't. TOP's glasses kept slipping down my nose because slickness my nose developed. My ponytail also pulled at my scalp, making it hard to think.

I sang well and I was able to control my breaths but by the end of the song, I felt worse than after my practices. The room cheered for me when the song ended. Even Appa YG clapped. The members stood up and clapped and whistled and...danced.

When everyone settled down, Appa YG spoke. "Very impressive. I am very proud of you, Mindy-sshi," Appa YG stated.

I pulled on a smiling face ignoring the fact I felt so tired and bad. "Thank you, Appa YG," I answered. Mistake. I just called him Appa YG.

He raised his eyebrows."That's a peculiar title..."

I blushed. "Sorry..."

"But I like it," he simply stated. Then he stood. "Meet me in my office tomorrow at 10 AM."

I smiled at him and wished a good day. When he left, the members bombarded me with compliments and hugs, saying it was the greatest idea to incorporate their signature dance moves. Seungri complained to me how he never really danced like that.

Eventually, the members had to return to their schedule and left me alone in the Dance Studio to clean up. I collapsed against the wall when they left. What was wrong with me? Why was I so tired and why did everything hurt? I tried my hardest today, that was a definite yes. But why did I feel so bad?

I unlaced the boots and pulled off of my foot along with the socks. The sight shocked me. Along my toes and the side of my feet were bright red blisters. When I reached out to touch them, I instantly pulled back because it stung. I wiped the sweat from my forehead to find a fine layer of foundation on the back of my hand that I come off of my face. I didn't know much about makeup but I was pretty sure it wasn't supposed to do that.

Frustrated, I pulled my ponytail apart and instantly, the tension disappeared from my scalp. No wonder I was so tired. All of these factors affected my performance. A scary thought passed through my mind. It could have been a coincidence or...I stood up with my socks and made my way to the elevators. I was going to get to the bottom to why Jae Min planted all of these unfortunate events on my evaluation day.

When I went down to the dressing rooms, I only found a few stylists I didn't know well. I made my way to the dressing table Jae Min used on me and found the type of foundation she used on me. I held it up to another stylist.

"What kind of foundation is this?" I asked politely.

She scrunched her eyebrows. "It's foundation used for photo shoots."

"Can you use it for performances?" I continued. "Of course not. The sweat loosens it."

She continued to stare at me suspiciously. "Why...?"

"I..." I stopped. I was about to tell her about Jae Min and her devious plan to make me feel like a wreck during my performance but held back. I barely knew this stylist and she could think I was on to get Jae Min fired. "I was just curious. Jiyong oppa kept talking about how important foundation was," I lied.

The stylist nodded like she knew exactly what I was talking about. I quickly thanked her and scurried out of the room back to the Dance Studio. Even if I doubts, I still tried to make myself believe Jae Min wasn't intentionally trying to screw up my life. She could have grabbed the wrong foundation without noticing. Everything could have been a coincidence. Still...something seemed fishy.

Suddenly, I thought of the time Jae Min sent me on those errands for me to return as a thief. Did she send me away to make me look like I was running away with the rings? That didn't make sense. She didn't know I had the rings in the first place. No one was there when I took them.

I slipped the boots back on and took my things. As I walked through the lobby, Se7en found me.

"Eo, Mindy-sshi," he called me.

I quickly bowed. "Annyongseo Se7en-ssi."

He smiled at me warmly. "How did your evaluation go? Sorry I didn't come."

"It went greatly!" I answered half-heartedly. He sent me a look as if he knew exactly which words I held underneath.

Se7en looked at his watch. "Hmm...I want to hear more about it. Why don't we go get some coffee?" he offered.

I couldn't say no. That would be rude. So we ended up stopping at the cafe Daesung and I went to before. We ordered our coffee and took a seat at a nice spot in the corner.

"So Mindy-ssi. I heard you learned Korean for 4 years. Impressive. You barely have an American accent," Se7en complimented.

"Thank you," I answered.

He raised his eyebrows at me then leaned in a little closer. "Okay, from old YG artist to new YG artist, tell me what went wrong."

"I'm not a YG artist," I said, rolling my eyes.

"Not yet. Come on, Mindy-ssi. What's wrong?" he asked.

I hesitated but ended up telling him everything I suspected about Jae Min. He listened carefully.

"It does seem peculiar. Jae Min came in as a stylist around three years ago. She requested to be a main stylist for Big Bang," Se7en told me. "Honeslty, I wanted her for my own since she was absolutely great at makeup and hair...and clothes! But she went to Big Bang."

"Does that tell us anything?"

"Not necessarily," Se7en answered. "Just keep your ears and eyes open on Jae Min. And wait it out. We'll see then." He quickly looked at his watch. "I have to go now. I'll see you soon."

We exchanged our goodbyes and he left. I sat at the cafe for another 15 minutes sorting out my ideas about Jae Min. Even if everything was true and was caused by her, I still couldn't come up with an answer to one question: Why?

Everyone I knew in Korea was busy with work so I was left with no choice but to explore Seoul by myself. I ended up walking around the streets of downtown Seoul and trying a variety of foods from the street vendors. Although the culture was blast to experience, I still felt lonely and wished for the Big Bang members to be with me. At the end of my trip, I tried ten different kinds of fish cakes and bought 50,000 won worth of presents and clothes. I came back to the apartment and checked the Internet for any interesting news back in the United States.

Somehow, I ended up on a blog updating VIPs on the activities of Big Bang. I was mentioned in a post. "_Who is this mysterious girl? From the press conference to shopping at the mall, this mysterious girl has been appearing around YG and Big Bang for the past week. There are suspicions of her being a new stylist or new member in the YG family. Not only that, she was accused of stealing rings..._"

I stopped reading then, afraid of what they said about me. Curious, I searched Jae Min on Google. Oddly, Tumblr links showed up but when I clicked on it, it showed nothing about Jae Min. Seemingly, VIPs weren't aware of Big Bang's main stylist. I ended up having nothing to do. I considered going back to the YG building but everyone was too busy for me and I would just get in the way.

Seungri called me later to check on my.

"Eo, Mindy," Seungri said. "How are you?"

"I'm fine!" I replied. "How is rehearsal?"

"Boring. I wish you were here right now. We could sneak or something and do something fun. My vocal chords are so tired."

We continued talking for 30 minutes or so before he had to get back to rehearsing. The Lees came back from visiting their relatives to have dinner with me. We ended talking about our family life.

When I got ready for bed, Jiyong called me. "What are you doing right now, Mindy?" he asked me.

I yawned. "I'm about to go to sleep. You?"

"Me too. I'm so tired but we have to keep rehearsing," Jiyong answered. "Hey, since you're going to sleep, why don't I sing you a lullaby?"

Having Jiyong's voice in my war before going to bed? Please, sign me up.

"Sounds good," I said yawning again.

He began. It was a soft lullaby. His soft, unique singing voice began to lull me to sleep and my eyelids drooped. After he had finished, I tried my best to say goodbye to him before falling asleep. When I did, I knocked out, falling into a dream where Jiyong's beautiful voice was laced through the sweetness of sleep.

I woke up early in the morning due to my alarm. I tried to go back to sleep but the thought of facing Appa YG today kept me from falling asleep again. So, to calm nerves, I went jogging with my Nike shorts and tank top with a cardigan. I ended up around the neighborhood Big Bang lived in at 7 so I tried their door if they were there.

After I knocked five times, Taeyang opened the door wearing boxers and no shirt. He almost slammed the door on my face in an attempt to hide behind it.

"M-mindy!" he stammered, startled. "W-what are you doing here?"

I laughed at his scared face. "Gosh, Taeyang oppa. You would think you've never shown your abs to anyone," I told him.

He still hid behind the door. "But...b-but I'm not wearing pants."

I pushed past him to get into the house. "I won't look. Just pull something on."

He quickly closed the door after him and ran to the room to pull on pants. TOP sat at the dining table with his head on the table. He looked like he was half asleep. I came up to him and poked him in the ear. He jumped up, startled but sent me a questioning look when he saw me.

"What are you doing here, Mindy?" he asked as he put his head back on the table.

"My question is why you are here right now," I told him.

"I'm waiting for Taeyang to make me breakfast," he mumbled.

I rolled my eyes and made my way to the kitchen. As TOP mumbled something about irresponsible dongsengs, I made three egg rolls with seaweed for his breakfast and laid it in front of him along with a pair of chopsticks and a glass of orange juice. He looked up at me.

"What is this?" he asked. "It's food, oppa. Don't tell me you're too bingu to know what it is," I said smiling.

"This girl!" he exclaimed but he picked up the chopsticks and began eating.

Taeyang came out and began to make himself breakfast glancing at me every so often as if I was sneaking glances at his treasures. Daesung and Seungri came out of the room to join them for breakfast and bid me a good morning. Seungri froze in his place.

"Wait," he said. "What are you doing here?" Daesung also scratched his head and squinted. "It's so early."

"I'm here to do some housekeeping," I answered as I handed TOP a napkin. "Where's Jiyong?"

"He's still in the room refusing to wake up," Taeyang told me.

I smirked to myself and made my way to the lazy leader. Jiyong laid on his belly with a blanket over his head in an attempt to keep sleeping past raise time. I reached over to the curtains and pulled them open, turned on the lights and sat on his bed.

I summoned my shouting voice and then began bouncing on the bed and screaming, "FIRE. FIRE. OMFG. FIRE. JIYONG OPPA, GET UP. WE'RE GONNA BURN TO DEATH."

Jiyong jumped out of bed and squinted around the room. His sight landed on him and he groaned, trying to get back on the bed. Instead, I grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the room to the dining room where Taeyang laid out breakfast.

"Woah!" Daesung cried. "Mindy got hyung to wake up!"

"That bastard," Jiyong groaned as he sat down at the table.

I acted like I was offended. "Excuse me?"

"I meant Daesung," he muttered.

I patted his head. "Good response." After we had breakfast together, we went to the YG building.

Before I went up to Appa YG's headquarters, the members wished me luck and all gave me a hug. I stepped into the large room and shouted a greeting the president.

Surprised, he returned my greeting. Oddly, he wore the same cap from yesterday. Together we sat down before the coffee table.

"Alright, Mindy-ssi," Appa YG started. "What do you think I will say?"

"Honestly?" I asked. He nodded. "Well, I think you would say I could have done better and that I should try harder."

He sighed. "Idols...There is no such thing as perfection." He smiled at me. "I was incredibly impressed by your performance yesterday. The energy from you was overpowering. Adding on with the hours you spent practicing, I am 100% impressed."

"Thank you," I told Appa YG.

"And with the right harnessing and training and MANY more years of experience, you'll be an amazing idol," he continued. My heart thumped against my chest. "That's why..." He pulled a piece of paper out of the folder he held. "...I want you to sign here."

"Wait what?" I stared at him dumbfounded.

Appa YG said, "I want you to start immediately as an official artist in the YG Family."


	11. Chapter 11

My hand shook nervously as I held the pen to sign my name beneath the contract. Appa YG smirked at my nervousness but didn't say anything. I signed it eventually and we began discussing what I would be doing the next few months. Appa YG told me that he will assign a manager to me after today.

Starting today, I was to prepare for my part in the YG Family concert in August where I would be performing an original by me, Somebody to Love with Big Bang, and Go Away with 2NE1. But before that, I was to preform my original song on a musical festival Big Bang would host in the middle of July. This was also known as my debut.

"Jiyong will help you develop your new song but your homework this week is to come up with five set of lyrics by the end of Friday and turn them into me," Appa YG told me.

"Understood," I told Appa YG.

When I stood up and left after bidding him a goodbye, I still couldn't believe my ears. I was in YG! My debut was in less than a month! Not only that, I would be performing with Big Bang in front of thousands.

When I came to the rehearsal room, I couldn't hold in my excitement. The artists were in the middle of rehearsing so I left them to it but watched them eagerly. After finishing the song, the five members plus Se7en came over to me to ask for the news.

Jiyong smirked, knowing what had happened. "With that face, I know you're in."

I only smiled as a confirmation. The members bombarded me with hugs and compliments. Se7en shook hands with me and welcomed me into the family. The other artists also congratulated me but no one seemed as hype as the members who were talking about going to eat in celebration.

"Ey, you have rehearsal," CL reminded them when Taeyang kept talking about a great please for some KBBQ.

"Which reminds me," I announced. "I will be preforming Go Away with 2NE1 then my original song and then Big Bang will come onstage for my performance of Somebody to Love.

"Yeah, we know," Daesung answered smiling.

My jaw dropped. "So you all knew I would get in?"

Seungri patted my hair. "We all got it this morning so don't be so offended."

TOP pulled me down to a seat next to him. "You're gonna need to practice hard with us every night now."

Staring out at the media-familiar faces, I realized that this was my family now. That whatever I went through, they went through. A sense of pride swelled at my chest.

I spoke into my mic, "Annyeonseo, everyone. I'm Mindy-ssi and I'm the new YG sibling."

I practiced my part of Somebody to Love with Big Bang. Apparently, I'm singing most of the parts and they are just going to be there for the dancing and support. When I practiced Go Away with 2NE1, I would sing along with them and get an occasional solo. It was fine by me. Just being in the same room with both of them made my day already.

Since I only had two songs to practice at the moment, I retreated to the couch to began my homework. I figured to do a song about the typical topic: love. But as hard as I tried, nothing came out. Great. Just great. I had five sets of lyrics to write and I can't even write the first line of the first set. Jiyong occasionally glanced over at me to see how I was doing. I was pretty sure he saw my frustration but he was busy rehearsing so I couldn't ask him for help.

Eventually, the artists took a break for lunch and dispersed to the cafeteria. Jiyong stayed behind and took a seat next to me.

"Have you ever written poetry?" he asked me.

I spun the pen in my hand. "Yes, for assignments and expression," I answered.

He took the notebook and pen from my hands. "It's basically the same thing. You just have to find that something to write about."

"Ding! That's the problem," I sighed. Jiyong reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. I tried not to show the shivers running through my body.

"I get that too," he told me, tapping the pen on the notebook. "I wrote so many songs I ended up with no more ideas."

"And everything else is so overused," I answered.

"Honestly, writing lyrics I can't help you with. It's all on you but let your mind breathe for a while so ideas can grow," he advised standing up. "I'm going to lunch. Want to come join?" I was about to shake my head no. Jiyong stopped me, "Ugh, why do I even ask? You're part of the family. You have to go."

He pulled on my hand and led me to the cafeteria where I had lunch with the YG Family.

After lunch, I practiced my songs over and over again. No wonder YG artists were so successful. They practiced until their throats that they could achieve that perfection.

I went home at 9 to take a breath and try writing again. I came up with many ideas but I found no inspiration in any of them. At 10, it suddenly hit me; a wave of lyrics that poured into my head. I called Jiyong after I wrote them down.

"Jiyong oppa! I got it!" I told him.

I was returned with a sleepy, "Got what?"

"What are you doing, oppa?" I asked suddenly curious.

"I'm taking a break," he replied with a still sleepy voice. I could not explain how sexy Jiyong's sleepy voice was.

"Oh, well...I got lyrics! Here. Listen to them:

Memories have gone.

Autumn has passed.

I have withered along with the leaves.

And my heart is scarred from longing.

And I am stuck in a cold, blue winter."

Jiyong replied, "I am so proud of you, Mindy. Those are amazing lyrics. Gosh, it's so good; I'm getting chills!" I blushed. It was one thing to be complimented by the music genius of YG but to be praised was another. "Keep it up, Mindy. I want to hear the rest when you finish, araso?" he told me.

"Yes, sir!" I exclaimed, excited to keep writing.

"Okay," he replied. "Let me get back to my break."

"Have a nice sleep, oppa," I said and then hung up. I looked back at my notebook and clicked my pen to start writing again.

I woke up early to jog and met up with Big Bang for breakfast. We then made our way to the YG building to work out. This time, I brought an extra set of clothes so I wouldn't have to walk around the building sweaty and stinky. Instead of going to rehearsal, I met with Appa YG to meet my manager.

When I stepped into the room, a young lady sat with Appa YG, already talking. I walked up to them and politely said hello.

"Annyeongseo. I'm Mindy." The young lady smiled and shook my hand. "I'm Lee Sae Kyung, but you can just call me Unni," she said.

We both sat down. Appa YG said, "This will be your manager for the rest of your musical career, Mindy. Get to know her well."

"Of course!" I exclaimed. I already felt a good vibe coming from Sae Kyung.

"We were just talking about your living quarters and your stay in Korea," Sae Kyung said. "We've contacted the Lee's already. All you have to do is talk to your mother."

I nervously fingered the lace of my dress. "Well, I can talk to her over the phone but..."

"What is it?" Appa YG asked. I looked up at him. As intimidating as he could be, a cloud of worry covered his eyes.

"I'm not sure if I can see my mother or father ever again. If I start this, then I'll be saying goodbye to America. And it's different for the other artists who have families in the country." I smoothed out my dress to hide my clammy palms. "And it's all so abrupt..."

Sae Kyung sent me a sympathetic smile. "We can fly them over for a few days. But we have to get your housing and your plane ticket cancelled and refunded."

"Does that mean I'm never going back to America?" I asked, stunned.

"Oh God, no," Sae Kyung answered, equally alarmed. "We...hmm." She turned to Appa YG. "We should have thought this through more. She has a life over there too."

Appa YG sighed. "The question is...if Mindy is ready to give all of that away for this life."

That thought sent a pang to my heart and fear crept into my veins. Really! Was I even ready?! Sae Kyung laid a hand on my arm, comforting. "Geez, that's a loaded question. Take it easy on her," she told Appa YG.

"How about..." I started. They stared at me, waiting for me to go on. I was afraid my suggestion might make Appa YG uncertain of where I stood in YG but I continued. "What if I tried this life until the end of August...? If I think I'm fit for it, then...I continue." "

You can't just come and leave as you wish," Appa YG told me. "You're debuting as a YG artist."

"As a temporary artist? As a project?" Sae Kyung objected. "There are such things."

Appa YG sighed heavily. "I would really want for you to stay as long as possible, Mindy-sshi."

"And that might happen," Sae Kyung told him. She turned to me. "The president and I have a lot to talk about before reporting to you, Mindy-sshi. Why don't I call you to fill you in afterwards?" I nervously exchanged numbers with her and left the room, weaker than entering the room.

I walked to the rehearsal room with tears filling my eyes with every step. When I reached the hallway of the rehearsal room, I found the Big Bang members walking towards me. Instantly, they saw that something was wrong.

Seungri reached me first. "Is there something wrong, Mindy?" I bit my lip to keep the tears from spilling out of my eyes.

"We were just on our way to check on you," Daesung said.

It was crazy how much the members cared about me, which made it even worse. Feelings were mixed inside of me. It was so scary; this abrupt change in my life. All of this happened in a week. I couldn't help but feel so frustrated and lost.

TOP asked me, "Really, Mindy. What's going on?"

Suddenly, I began bawling. From the accusation against me to the nights long practicing to the terrifying change in my life, the tears built up. The members were horrified, not knowing what to do. Jiyong took the initiative and wrapped his arm around me. Soon enough, the members joined him. Taeyang took his sleeve to wipe away my tears. I tried to explain why I was being that way but my sobs overpowered my words.

After I had calmed down, they pulled away and stared at me lovingly.

"Whatever is going on..."Taeyang said, "we are here for you."

"It's just that...I don't know what to do. I have my old life and my new life which is being in YG."

Jiyong grabbed my shoulders and looked me straight in the eyes. "Whatever your decision is, we will stick by your side. Promise?" he said. He looked to his members and they all replied, "Promise."

"So don't be scared, Mindy," Jiyong told me.

"Oh God," I said wiping my eyes. "That was embarrassing."

"Oh my goodness, Mindy," TOP exclaimed. "There's so much going on with you right now and you're concerned about being embarrassed?"

I smiled, feeling better that I had five amazing men by my side. I skipped down the hallway.

"Right now," I called to them, "I choose this life. And I choose Big Bang." They hurried after me. "Because I'm that typical VIP."

After rehearsing for a while, Sae Kyung called me so I excused myself. She explained to me how the contract was changed so that it would last until the end of August and if I wanted to continue with my business, I could extend it. She also told me Appa YG bought plane tickets for my parents to come over and have chat with me, Sae Kyung, and Appa YG.

"They should be coming by Saturday, the earliest," she said.

"This is all so great to hear, Unni," I told her. I felt a great deal of stress fly off my shoulders. "Is there anything else?"

"Of course, there is." She laughed. "But don't worry. It's not terribly overwhelming. You're just going to have a photo shoot on Thursday at 10 in the morning to 1 in the afternoon. You also have a private interview on Friday evening at 8 for the background information when you debut."

"Don't I have to come up with a concept and everything?" I asked. "And...an album?"

"Relax. You'll talk with Big Bang to come up the concept and you're going to feed off of Big Bang for a while on their music," she replied.

"Well if you put it that way!" I exclaimed, offended.

"Which is not a bad thing," she covered up. "You'll learn a lot from them. They've been in the industry for 5 years."

"You say it like I don't know..." I laughed.

"I'll be going now. I'll talk to you later," she answered.

After that, I took a break from rehearsing to write lyrics with TOP and Jiyong, the lyric geniuses of Big Bang. By 4, we had a total three set of new lyrics. The first set was called: A Blue Sorrow (which sounds more poetic in Korean). The second one was called: Thorns. And the last one was called: Egotistical.

We then rehearsed in a different room for the music festival coming up. After a while, we ended up fooling around instead of rehearsing.

"Kang Daesung oppa~Please take this magical wand and save Jiyong oppa from DinoTabi," I called in a fake desperate voice as I held out a drumstick to Daesung.

In the corner, Jiyong crouched in a fetal position while TOP enveloped him in a tight, wholesome hug.

"No one can stop my evil wrath!" TOP screamed, jumping off of Jiyong and landing on Seungri who was doing pushups with Taeyang. Jiyong laid on the floor, still.

"What have you done?!" I shrieked as I ran to Jiyong who began twitching.

TOP jumped from Seungri to me and wrapped his strong arms around me, expecting me to be able to hold his strength. We ended up sprawled next to Jiyong who was laying on his back giggling.

"Daesungie has come!" Daesung exclaimed as he tapped the stick on each of our hearts, as if it saved us from TOP's evil touch.

Taeyang eventually stopped his pushups and got to his senses. "I think we need to get out of here," he suggested.

We all stood up and dusted off our clothes. Jiyong even fixed his hair in a mirror.

"Where do you want to go?" Seungri asked.

"Wait wait wait wait wait wait," I said. "Aren't we going to get in trouble with Appa YG for not rehearsing?"

"We're all adults here," Daesung said. "We can make our own decisions."

"Well, not all of us..." Seungri replied looking over to TOP who was sucking on a lollipop. TOP narrowed his eyes and smacked Seungri in the head. "Ah! That hurt, hyung!" he yelled.

"Respect your elders, bastard," TOP scolded.

Jiyong reached for his jacket. "Please, let us leave," he exclaimed. "I have the perfect place," Taeyang said. "Let's go!"

With that, we grabbed our jackets and things to go on an adventure, hoping Appa YG wouldn't catch us ditching our job.

We hopped into a taxi and drove all the way to an night time amusement park with our faces hidden in case the driver wanted to take sneaky pictures of us. We paid our tickets and stepped into the bright amusement with lights, lanterns, and booths with rip off games.

"Aren't we going to be seen?" I asked nervously, thinking about the vicious VIPs from the mall.

"It's dark. Even if we were seen, we could escape easily," TOP said, staring up at the rides excited.

Seungri wrapped his arm around my shoulders and led me along with the group.

Daesung peered, anxiously at the rides. "Youngbae hyung, out of all places why do you choose the amusement park?"

"It's fun," he replied. "What? are you scared?"

Daesung smiled. "Noooooooo."

We got in line for the largest roller coaster and boarded it, excited. Personally, I wasn't a fan of rides. I only tolerated it because I was used to it. I was seated next to Daesung and Seungri on the ride.

"Don't worry, Mindy. I'll be here," Seungri reassured valiantly.

"If you're scared, you can hold my hand," Daesung offered.

I rolled my eyes and we began ascending. When we reached the drop, the two beside me began screaming bloody murder as we raced down the tracks. So much for protecting me. After the ride was over, the two leaned against the wall, acting as of they weren't the ones shrieking for their mothers.

"You know..." Jiyong said to Seungri and Daesung. "You could at least control what you scream on the ride."

"What are you talking about?" Seungri asked nonchalantly.

"We weren't screaming." Daesung stared at the ground, suspiciously.

"Oh please. We could have heard 'I think I wet my pants' from Gangnam," Taeyang exclaimed.

"Ay! I never said anything like that," Daesung protested.

"But Seungri sure did," TOP answered glaring mischievously at him.

Seungri only lowered his head in shame.

"Aww, it's okay oppas. It gets better from here," I told the two.

"We should go on that one next," Jiyong suggested pointing to a ride that turned you upside down and then around and around. Daesung and Seungri gulped and grasped each other's hands.

Eventually, the two got used to the drops and the screaming and the wetting of pants and we went on all of the rides. As we passed some game booths, an item caught my eye.

"No way..." I exclaimed. I ran to a pillow with all of the Big Bang members' faces printed on it. "That's crazy!"

"Did we ever release pillows with our faces on it?" Taeyang asked Jiyong. "Not that I remember," Jiyong asked shaking his head and smiling.

I turned to the members and sent them a puppy face. "I would love to fall asleep to all of you close to me..."

They looked at each other and shrugged; why not? Basically the game was to get all three ping long balls into the red glass cup with a small mouth. Seungri tried first and only ended up getting a small prize of a sticker set. Daesung pulled a stunt that only got me another small prize. Taeyang was so close to getting the prize but ended up getting a medium prize of a crown plushie. Jiyong ended up getting another sticker set. On TOP's turn, he surprisingly landed two of the three balls into the red cup. On the last one, he turned to me.

"This is it," he told me.

Jiyong began massaging TOP's shoulders. "Come on hyung!"

"You can do it oppa!" I exclaimed. "Fighting!"

"Kiss the ball," TOP commanded. I brushed my lips on the ping long ball. TOP also brushed his lips on the ball and aimed. With a flick of his wrist, he threw the ball and it smashed the red cup. The members were in an uproar.

"Did you see that?!" Taeyang exclaimed. Jiyong was speechless and jumping along with Daesung, Seungri, and me.

"I'm sorry but you're gonna have to pay for it," the booth person told TOP, shocked.

"But I still get the pillow, right?" he asked. The booth person nervously handed TOP the pillow as he handed the guy money.

TOP gave the pillow to me and I returned it with a bear hug. By the time we reached the YG building, we had at least three stickers on our faces, balloon hats, and sticky cotton candy lips. We rode the elevator up to the rehearsal room to find Appa YG sitting on a chair with his legs crossed as if he expected us. We quickly fell silent.

"Well, what do we have here?"


	12. Chapter 12

Appa YG raised his eyebrows in an amused way. "Why don't the seven of us have a nice talk in my office?" he suggested.

We had no choice but to obey him. On the way to the top floor, Appa YG snatched the cotton candy from us and snacked on it, happily. When we reached his office, the six of us sat in front of Appa YG on the same couch with our eyes somewhere other than Appa YG.

"Did you guys have fun?" he asked, smirking. No one said anything, afraid of saying the wrong thing. It was scary to have an elder ready to scold you. "I asked a question," he simply stated, eating the rest of my cotton candy. He then sighed, frustrated. "I can't take you guys seriously with those things on your heads."

For a moment, I didn't understand what he was talking about until I realized we all still had our balloon hats. We took them off. Seungri looked a little too upset having to give up his panda balloon hat.

"It's okay, Seungri-ssi. You can wear it after I finish," Appa YG told Seungri. He still looked forlorn. "Alright, since no one is answering me. I'll just get straight to the point." Appa YG lectured us on the endless responsibilities of being an adult and YG artist.

I didn't pay attention to much of it because it was boring and it was so intriguing watching the members' terrified expressions as if these talks were the end of their lives. I was so used to these back home. I guess being away from their parents made them forget what it was like to be scolded.

"And Mindy," Appa YG said. I looked up from my cuticles. "Second day in YG and you're already this rebellious?"

"I..." I began. Honestly, I should have thought things through a bit more.

Appa YG sighed. "Alright alright. Let's break the ice. Did you guys have fun?"

"Yes, we did. TOP oppa won this for me," I said, smiling. I held up the pillow. The members shot glares at me. "What?" I asked them.

"He's still in his lecture phase," Taeyang uttered under his breath.

"But he just said to break the ice..." I answered.

Appa YG laughed. "These guys take things so seriously." The members looked surprised at Appa YG's response. "We never released those pillows..." Appa YG said, perplexed.

"I know right? Fanmade, I think," I replied.

"Where did you go?" he asked, reaching for his glass of water.

"We went to the amusement park," Daesung said.

"Like little kids..." Appa YG laughed. "It's disappointing you guys didn't come up with anything productive."

"Actually..." Jiyong said. "We came up with Mindy's concept."

"Oh, really. What is it?" Appa YG asked, interested. Jiyong looked at me to start explaining.

I took a breath. "Two halves of me; one punk and one innocent and pretty. It's based on my song Thorns," I told him.

"Are you going to sing that for your debut?" he asked me.

"Depends. I have to finish my lyrics first to see which one I like the most," I replied.

Suddenly, Appa YG pointed to a Bearbrick on his many glass shelves. "Mindy-ssi, you are familiar with those toys, right?" I nodded, confused. Appa YG smirked, "TOP-ssi tried to order it before me since it was the last in stock. What a loser." TOP looked down at his lap and blushed. Appa YG turned on his computer screen. "Alright, back to work guys," he told us.

I was about to follow the members out of the room when Appa YG called me back.

"Mindy-ssi, I have something to say to you," he said.

"Yes, Appa YG?" I answered.

He slightly smiled at his nickname. "The Big Bang boys...I'm curious." "About what?" "They seem so livelier now, even more during their comeback. I'm curious about what you did to do it," he answered.

I laughed nervously. "I didn't do anything..."

"No no. You did. You may not see it, but damn, whenever you enter the room their whole face lights up like fireworks," Appa YG praised. "Honestly, I think you're almost the best thing that's happened to them."

"It can't be like that..." I muttered doubtfully.

"Trust me on this. Oh, dear. Imagine what would happen if you just left them unannounced..." Appa YG smiled reassuringly at my horrified face. "Of course, that's never going to happen. Good work, Mindy-ssi. Now get back to it." I was about to leave when Appa YG called out again, "Talk with Jae Min-ssi tomorrow for your concept costumes."

A scary shudder rippled through my body. I had a bad feeling things weren't going to turn out so well.

The next morning, I met up with Jae Min in the stylist room. She met me with a gleaming, innocent smile.

"Congratulations, Mindy-ssi! I knew you could do it!" she told me as she have me a hug.

"Of course, you would," I uttered thinking about how she tried to jeopardize my evaluation. "Thanks, anyway."

She smiled, excited. "You are definitely welcome! Anyway..." She pulled me over to a couch. "I heard about your concept. Very traditional."

"I was hoping it would match with my song Thorns," I answered.

She looked down at a sheet of notes. "Mhmm. I'll just go by what Appa YG says." I uncomfortably shifted my position.

"I was thinking about preppy pretty as one of the costumes-"

"As said on here, yes. Come here and look at the clothes I've picked out." She stood up and walked over to a rack of clothes divided from pink and pastels to dark red and shades of grey and black. I slightly frowned at the link and pastels.

"Not exactly like that..." I commented.

Jae Min seemed offended. "It took a while to collect these."

"I'm sorry but I think it's a bit too extreme of a difference. I want it to be able to blend and transition well," I told her.

Jae Min crossed her arms stubbornly. "Well, let's see how well you do picking out your costumes."

I quickly chose the least childish colors from the rack along with a few items from the reds. The first outfit I put together was a deep red coat, lacy tights, gold stilettos, and a gold headband with a bow. When I stepped out of the dressing room, Jae Min's initial reaction was admiration but she quickly changed it to a poker face.

"It looks like normal clothes you were on the streets," she scoffed.

"That's the point," I told her.

She shrugged and began to note it down. "How's your makeup?"

"I'm thinking red lipstick...for both of the sides," I replied.

She sighed. "I'll make it work."

Geez, what was with the attitude. I stepped back into the dressing room and sighed to my reflection in the mirror. What was with Jae Min? One minute, she's an angel and the next, she's Satan's personal assistant. The next outfit was a bit more complicated in a simple way...I wore black shirts with a baggy dark red V-neck and my hair in a high, messy ponytail. I also added fake glasses and cow slippers.

When I stepped out, Jae Min's jaw dropped in surprise and shock. "What is going on?!" she exclaimed.

"I want to show that the other side of me goes everywhere I am." She rolled her eyes. Somehow, an angry burst of energy ran through my body.

"Look, Jae Min Unni," I said, "I come up with the concept costumes and you're here to guide me, not criticize."

She sent me an understanding smile. "It's just that I send this to the president and I don't want him to think you're a little..." She waved her index finger around her temple.

"I'm sure he will consider my ideas..." I answered, also faking a smile.

After that, Jae Min stayed silent about any criticism. She only gave me advice to make my outfit better. The last outfit for my normal side was a simple rose colored spring dress with black laced heels and rose earrings. We ended up deciding Rose was the theme.

On the other side, my first outfit consisted a leather jacket with a Lacey black shirt and combat boots and a fake rose tattoo. My second outfit for the category was a low cut blood red tank top and black checkered boxer shorts and red painted toe nails.

Lastly, it was a black body con dress with a whole mess of accessories and a red beanie along with gorgeous black pumps.

When we finished, Jae Min called me over. "Hey...Mindy-ssi. I know it seems like I'm trying to contradict you on every idea..." No kidding on that. "But it's all for the perfection of this debut. I mean, that's what you want right?"

"Yup," I answered quickly, ready to get out of the place quick and back to rehearsing with the members. "Well, I gotta go. See you later. Thanks for everything. Bye."

I was about to grab my bag and leave when Jae Min forcefully grabbed my arm. "Where are you going?" she demanded.

"Well, where else? To rehearse for the music festival and concert," I answered, annoyed at her sudden curiosity.

She slightly narrowed her eyes. "With the Big Bang members?" I nodded, scared.

She almost looked angry at me but soon afterwards, she regained her sense and smiled. "Well, work hard," she told me.

When I rode the elevator down underground, I was able to conclude the reason to Jae Min's strange behavior. And I had to tell the Big Bang members soon.

When I reached the underground dancing studio, the members were busy running Tonight with Joon Tae. Seungri waved when I walked in.

"Seungri-ssi," Joon Tae exclaimed, "what are you doing?" The other members stopped and groaned at Seungri.

"I-I waved at Mindy," Seungri answered nervously. Joon Tae rolled his eyes.

"Okay, everyone take five. We'll over it one more time then train with Mindy."

"Actually, Jiyong and I have to finish lyrics and music for my song," I told Joon Tae.

"Why wasn't I notified before?" Joon Tae asked.

"I'm still adapting to this schedule. My manager texted it to me this morning and she probably didn't notify you," I answered.

It was so scary. My schedule was tight everyday for the next month and it was so hard to catch up to it.

"Alright. Alright. We'll just run it without Jiyong," Joon Tae said.

The members took a seat and I came up to them. "Guys...do you ever have a bad feeling about Jae Min?" I asked them. They stared at me strangely.

"No..." Taeyang answered. "Why?"

"She's been acting really weirdly around me. Like one minute she's really nice and one minute it seems like she hates my guts," I told them.

Daesung smiled nicely at me. "Aww, Mindy. She isn't like that..."

"B-but...Jae Min doesn't like me," I told them.

"Jae Min is so sweet. She probably loves you. What makes you think that?" TOP replied.

"Well, the attacking VIPs wasn't a coincidence..." I muttered.

"Are you blaming that on her?" Seungri demanded.

"I-no...It's not blaming if it was actually her-"

Jiyong's eyes widened. "You can't just say that Mindy. Plus it's in the past."

"Ok. She's the one who-" Jiyong sent me a glare.

"That's enough, Mindy."

Joon Tae called the members to start practicing again so I left first to the third floor; recording studios. I couldn't believe it. Out of all of the people I knew, I thought the members would actually believe me about my suspicions. At least, they could look into it.

As I walked through the relaxation room to the recording studio, I couldn't help but feel a little lonely. I felt like there was no one to understand what Jae Min was doing to me. When I reached the recording studio, I began working on the music with a simple beat. Jiyong stepped in shortly afterwards and took a seat next to me. I continued working without looking at him. He only stared at me.

"Mindy..."Jiyong began.

"Let's not talk about it. We need to finish this by 6 so we can show it to Appa YG," I said, stilling looking down at the keyboard.

Suddenly, Jiyong spun me around in my chair, rolled his chair closer to mine, and grabbed my shoulders. My heart pumped against my chest. He was so close to me...

"Mindy...I'm sorry for just not listening to you," he said. "You never got to fully explain." I just stared into his bright brown eyes. He continued, "When you walked out, I realized how lonely you are and we are the only ones you could talk to..."

"Well, you guys aren't the ONLY-" I began

"And it's frustrating, I know," Jiyong cut me off. "So from now, I will listen...to whatever you want to tell me."

I stared him with my raised eyebrows. "So I can tell you anything comfortably?" I asked. He bit his lip and nodded his head. I leaned in a little closer. "Can I tell you, you have seaweed bits on your lips?"

Jiyong began licking his lips desperately. "Is it gone?!" he asked, frustrated.

I turned back to the keyboard, rolling my eyes. "I thought you were saving it for later."

We got to work. By 5, we finished the music for the song and all was left was the recording which, of course, was going to take a while. Appa YG came in when I was warming up to begin recording.

"Annyeongseo, Appa YG," I called to him, bowing. He returned my greeting. Jiyong showed him the music for Thorns and he didn't say anything except for me to begin recording. I sang it first as a test run to see if the music fit with the lyrics well enough.

"Mindy-ssi. You wrote this by yourself?" Appa YG asked.

"Yes yes! With a bit of help from Jiyong oppa and TOP oppa," I answered.

He pursed his lips. "Very interesting..."

"Wha-what's that supposed to mean?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Something," he answered. He stood up. "It's a great song, Mindy. And I think it'll be awesome for your debut. Remember your assignment."

I pointed. "It's on the table," I told him.

"Oh..." His tone seemed surprised. "Wow. This is impressive." He took the lyrics and left Jiyong and me.

Jiyong smiled at me. "Let's go!" And we began recording.

I was met with a surprise when I reached the Lee's apartment at 8. As I stepped into the apartment, my eyes instantly landed to a few suitcases lying around the place with items stocked in them. I made my way around it to Eun Mi who was looking through a list. Sang Ki was talking on the phone with his boss while So Young played with her dolls.

"What's going on?" I asked Eun Mi as I took a seat at the table. She looked like she aged three years.

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart," Eun Mi told me. "My mother had just fallen ill and we need to go to her in the countryside to take care of her. We've been trying to find you a place to live while we're gone but there's none and hotels are too expensive."

I couldn't believe my ears.

"Does that mean I'll be living in the streets?" I asked, horrified.

Eun Mi looked like she was about to cry. "Oh dear God, I hope not. If you can find a place to live by tomorrow afternoon, then all is good."

"When are you leaving?" I started to feel desperation.

"Tomorrow evening." Eun Mi gripped my shaking hands. "I'm so sorry, Mindy-ssi but it was all so sudden and we have no choice."

Sang Ki finished his phone call and Eun Mi looked up to him. "I just told my boss I'll be leaving and if he had any places available," he said.

"What did he say?" Eun Mi asked.

"None..." Sang Ki answered solemnly.

That meant that if I didn't find a place to live by tomorrow afternoon, I would literally homeless.

"Wait," I said. "Why can't I live here by myself?"

"The landlord won't allow it," Sang Ki said. Eun Mi added, "We tried every method..."

"How long will you be gone?" I couldn't keep my hands from shaking.

"At least a week," Sang Ki answered. I took out my phone to call Sae Kyung.

"What is it?" she asked when she picked up.

"Huge problem, Unni." I told her about the dilemma.

Sae Kyung answered, "Honestly, it's really hard to find any place since it's tourist season."

"What can we do?" I asked.

"Well, we have to go to the last resort," she replied.

Panic raised to my throat. "Oh no! I don't want to live in the streets!"

"What?" she asked confused. "No...Oh no! I meant you're going to have to live with the members."

"The members of what?"

"BIG BANG, MINDY. BIG BANG. Who else do you think I'm talking about?" she replied.

"Hey, in my defense, you could be talking about 2NE1 or any other k-pop band in Korea," I told her. What she said finally processed through my mind. "WHAT?"

"I'll have to talk to the members and Appa YG about this but we honestly have no choice," she told me. I still didn't believe my ears.

"Are you saying I'm going to be living under the same roof as TOP, Jiyong, Taeyang, Daesung, and Seungri? Like as in eating and sleeping and using the bathroom?"

"Yes yes." She sighed. "I'll call Appa YG and you should start packing your things." She quickly hung up. I looked at Sang Ki and Eun Mi who stared at me desperately.

"I-I found a place..."

I quickly packed all of my things which wasn't a lot and pulled my luggage into the living room of the Lee's. They looked at me with an ashamed expression as if the situation was their fault.

"Sang Ki-ssi, Eun Mi-ssi," I told them, "it's not your fault any of this happened, okay? All I'm praying for right now is that your mother will be alright."

Eun Mi wrapped her arms around me tightly. "We'll come back for you. Just be safe."

Sang Ki grabbed my suitcase handle. "We better get going. We have to prepare for tomorrow too."

"Hold on," I told him. I bent down to So Young who stared back at me with wide eyes. "I don't know if you hate me or you're scared of me but I'll miss you, sweetheart. Don't get into too much trouble."

So Young surprised me by reaching out and hugging me around my neck. "Unni, don't leave yet," she whimpered.

I laughed. "Actually, you're the one that's leaving." But I couldn't ignore the sudden pang in my heart.

After giving out our last farewells, Sang Ki drove me to the YG building to meet up with Sae Kyung.

"Thank you so much for having me stay at your hostel," I said.

"It's been a pleasure to have you live with us, Mindy-ssi. We will be back soon," Sang Ki promised. With that, he left and I headed to the lobby of the building to find Sae Kyung talking with another staff member. When she saw me, she quickly walked up to me.

"Everything is set. You'll be staying at the Big Bang hostel. But we have to keep this matter as quiet as possible," she informed me. "It will be absolute hell if the press found out about you living there."

"Is it because Appa YG is slowly releasing information about me?" I asked her.

"Yes yes. I'm glad you're aware of that," she answered. Each day, Appa YG released a little bit of information about me to the public to get them excited for my debut.

Sae Kyung grabbed my suitcase and we walked outside into the night air and into her car.

"The members aren't home right now but here are the keys." She handed me a set of keys. "Get settled in the extra room next to Jiyong's closet. The members are aware that this is happening." My hand shook as I took the keys from her.

It was really happening. I was really going to live with the Big Bang members. When we reached my hostel, she reminded me to check my texts in the morning and bid me a farewell. I stepped into the dark house and flipped on a switch. I eventually found the room next to Jiyong's closet and flipped the light switch. It was relatively small with a bed and desk set. I put my suitcase of clothes in the closet and my lucky blanket and teddy bear on the bed.

I took a quick shower. Since there was no one home anyway, I practice singing in the shower from Heartbreaker to Wedding Dress. It turned out to be a big mistake. When I stepped out of the bathroom, I was faced by the five members sitting at the living room clapping and cheering for me.

"What-what is this?" I asked blushing.

Jiyong couldn't keep his laughter in. "Your vocals are developing well," he said.

"I like what you did with the bridge of Wedding Dress," Taeyang complimented.

I gripped my wet hair, realizing they had heard EVERYTHING while I was in the shower. I took a step back and hid my face. "Oh my goodness," I whimpered. "I didn't know you guys were back."

Seungri got up to use the bathroom as the others dispersed to do their things.

"Just feel at home," Daesung told me as he passed me on his way to his room he shared with Taeyang. I smiled shyly and took out the hairdryer from my suitcase.

TOP called me from the kitchen so I came out. He ordered me to sit down at the table as he plugged in the hairdryer.

"Let me dry your hair for you," he offered. I felt shivers as he reached for my hair. TOP gently went through each wet section with care and by the time he finished, my hair was dry and soft.

Taeyang stepped out of his room his pajamas, stretching. "Do you guys want to watch a movie?" he asked everyone in general.

"I rented a new horror film," Jiyong called from closet.

They all eventually changed into their sleeping clothes and we reclined onto the couch.

I sat next to Daesung who reassured me, "If you get scared, you could hold my hand."

"That's the same thing you said before screaming to Gangnam on the roller coaster," I laughed.

Seungri laughed loudly.

"You shouldn't be the one laughing, Seungri," Jiyong said.

TOP smirked. "You screamed for your Oma too."

Seungri pouted at TOP but turned back to the movie. He muttered something about his hyung not loving him.

The movie was indeed horrifying but halfway through, I began to feel my eyelids droop. And before I knew it, my eyes closed the curtains to a horrifying ghost possessing a young girl's body. But I felt at home for a first time in a long time.


	13. Chapter 13

I woke up in the middle of night in my bed to my phone vibrating on the night stand. As I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, I picked up the phone and checked the time. It was 4 in the morning. Who in the right mind would call me at that time? When I saw the caller ID, my heart tightened and panic rose to my throat.

"Hey..." I answered in English.

"Oh hey Mindy," the voice answered also in English. "It's been a while hasn't it? I wonder why..."

I pulled the covers off of me and walked out to the kitchen to get a glass of water. "I'm so sorry, Brody," I answered. "I didn't you know were back from Africa...already."

"Yes you did. You were talking about how we should go out for a drink since our dates back into America was so close together," he said.

I took a seat in the dining table chair and ran my fingers through my hair. That was right. Everything was so crazy I forgot about my former life even my "boyfriend."

"Yeah...well..."I stammered.

He said, "I heard you're still in Korea. Busy?"

"Don't get me started," I replied, letting out a sigh of relief. I started to think he was actually mad at me.

"Oh, I won't." His tone told me I spoke too soon.

"Are you mad at me? I told I was so busy and caught up on things. I'm sorry I forgot to call you," I told him.

Brody sighed through the phone. "It's hard not to be."

"You're not my boyfriend, Brody," I said forcefully. "I'm not guilty if I forget one call."

"You promised to call me when I get back," he simply stated.

"Well, I'm calling you now." I started to feel angry. Brody wasn't the type to make a big deal of these things.

"Technically, I called you," he replied. I rubbed at a spot on the table in frustration.

"Brody, you're making such a big deal of this. What's the problem?"

There was a pause.

"I don't know. I just feel like I don't know you anymore," he replied.

It sent a pang to my heart. My relationship with Brody was complicated beyond words. He was technically my boyfriend since he sat with me through my high school life and took me out to prom and bought me dinner at a five star restaurant and everything but we never put a label to it. Some say he was my best friend but I denied it, saying I didn't believe in best friends. Our relationship was too complicated to label.

Brody continued, "I...I just don't feel you need me anymore. And I meet new people along the way that connect with me more than you do with me now..."

"Our relationship isn't about needing one another..." I answered.

"I know bu-"

I sighed. "I don't understand how you can think that after all these years. It's-"

"LOOK, Mindy," Brody interrupted me. "I want to be in a real relationship without someone who can sort out her feelings."

His sudden outburst sent a shock through my body.

"W-what?" I stammered.

Brody hesitated. "We were traveling together in Africa..."

"Are you saying you're just throwing me away?" I asked, tears forming at the corner of my eyes.

"She knows she wants it. She knows how to work a relationship..." he continued.

"Oh my God," I cried, tears beginning to fall.

"You just can't stick with what you want, Mindy..." Brody told me.

"I'm done," I croaked out.

I dropped my phone into the table and buried my face into my hands and let out my tears. Because I took a path I wanted to, I lost my almost boyfriend. It was so sudden; the pain was a stab to m heart. I couldn't deny that it was part of my fault if I just forgot about Brody buy him shoving his newfound love in my face...that was too much to handle.

I felt arms surround me and looked over to find Jiyong staring at me with sad eyes. He held my eyes a little more then tightened his hug to let me cry into his shoulder. And I did. He kissed my hair and laid his cheek on top of my head as he stroked my hair.

"I'm here," he whispered into my ear, his breath sending pleasant shivers down my back.

Instinctively, my arms found their way around his waist and sat together in each other arms as he soaked up my misery for me. When I pulled away to wipe my tears, he reached out with his two thumbs to do it for himself. Jiyong ended up cradling my face in his hands.

"You look so beautiful when you cry," he softly uttered.

Jiyong quickly dropped his hands and scooted back. My heart dropped to my belly but I sent him a smile to show I was okay.

"So who was that?" he asked, pouring more water into my glass.

"It's just some stupid guy," I answered.

He handed the glass to me. "So what did he do?"

I quickly explained what had happened to Jiyong. His facial expression never changed once. When I finished, he took the glass from me and took a sip.

"That stupid liar," he answered.

I laughed at his song reference. "A stupid, stupid, stupid liar," I replied.

"You have a big day today, so you should go back to sleep," Jiyong told me, lightly tapping the tip of my nose with his finger. I was about to leave when I realized he wasn't also going to his room.

"Aren't you going to sleep too, oppa?"

Jiyong looked down at his phone. He sighed, "I have some things to take care of."

His forlorn expression looked suspicious but I didn't push it so I said goodnight to him. The next morning, I dressed in a simple outfit so I could change easily to my costumes. Jae Min was there, of course, but fortunately, Hye Ri was in charge of my make up.

While she brushed a layer of foundation on, she praised me on my concept choice. "It's so original and realistic! Two side! One hiding the other...I'm so proud of you," she said.

"Mmm, thank you," I muttered heartlessly. I glanced over to Jae Min talking to the cameraman.

Hye Ri nervously looked at me. "Is there something wrong?"

I quickly looked back at Hye Ri's reflection in the mirror and fake-smiled. "Everything is alright," I replied.

We got my first outfit put together so I walked out onto the white screen and began my photo shoot. In the beginning, it was hard to think if good poses but as the staff played music, I loosened up and played along with the photographer. We occasionally looked out how the shots turned out to me on the computer screen. I must admit, I looked a little awesome.

Halfway through the shoot, the photographer took out the SD card to replace with another one since it was full. Panic flashed across my mind when my eyes landed on Jae Min glancing at the card.

"Excuse me," I called to the photographer. "I think you should keep that in a safe place."

The photographer smiled, slipped it into his camera bag, and said, "I got that handled."

I looked over to Jae Min who stared at me instead of the card. I had a suspicion that if the card was lying around, she would pick it up and burn 2 hours work of photos. But instead of taking the card, she sent me daggers as if saying "Do you think I'm the bad guy? How immature."

When I finished my shots for the outfit, Jae Min called me over. "Mindy-ssi, is there a problem?" she asked.

My palms clammed up. What if she found out I was suspecting her and she's finding a way for me to not point it out? What if she black mails me? Terror filled my body.

"You really have to loosen up," she advised. She flashed me a smile. "Really! Smile more!" A wave a relief swept through my body.

"Yes ma'am! I'll work harder," I answered.

During our ten minute break, Se7en came into the room and pulled me over from talking to the photographer. "Eo, Se7en-ssi. What is it?" I asked him.

He looked excited. "I found some more information on Jae Min!"

I pulled him to a quieter corner as I looked around for any sign of Jae Min.

"What is it?" I asked.

Se7en looked like he won the lottery. He answered, "I was talking to Joon Tae this morning and he mentioned something about Jae Min practicing early in the morning in the Dance Studio a while ago. What do you think it means?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. She could be a dancer for YG?"

Se7en shook his head. "She could be training for an audition."

"Into YG?" I asked bewildered.

"Mhmm. Jae Min might be considering to join YG as an idol," Se7en concluded.

I sighed. Even if it was critical information, it still didn't fit the puzzle pieces together.

"What can we do with that? It doesn't connect with anything," I told him.

Se7en's face fell. "I've been thinking about it too. But I just wanted you to hear to keep it in your mind."

"Thank you, Se7en-ssi," I smiled at him.

When he left, we instantly got back to work and I finished by 2PM. After that, I went straight to the recording studios to finish Thorns with Jiyong. As awesome as Jiyong was, he was still really strict and serious about recording. On my 27th time singing a phrase from the song, I asked Jiyong for a break since my voice was about to break.

"Jiyong oppa...My cords are exhausted. Can we take a break?" I turned away from the mic to clear away my throat.

Jiyong ran his fingers through his hair. "Well, why can you get if right the first time?" His overly serious tone scared me into saying nothing.

As it got later into the night, he got more frustrated. I had to preserve my energy through occasional sips from an energy drink since I haven't eating since 12 and we wouldn't stop to eat until finished. Eventually, I finished recording and all that was left was the final edits and arrangements to the track. Jiyong and I sat at the mixing station for over an hour fixing some spots and changing the music in another. It was such hard work, looking at all the musical terms on computer. I quickly learned from Jiyong, though.

At 8, I received a call from Seungri. "Hey Mindy. The president wants you to be in his office in 10 minutes," he announced.

"Why didn't he invite me himself?" I accidental turned a tuning knob to much and winced at the random pitch shift in my notes. Seungri hesitated as if looking to another place," There...there are guests," he replied.

I sighed and looked at the near complete track.

"Bring Jiyong oppa too," Seungri told me. He quickly up. It was weird that he wouldn't just tell me what was up. I told Jiyong about Seugri's demand.

"Ah...that," Jiyong laughed.

I stared, startled at him. "What is it?!"

He smirked. "Let's finish this first." We quickly finished the second first of the song and rode the elevator up to the top floor. The whole time, Jiyong and I argued the way to add another beat. Although it was hard to deal with two different opinions at the same time, it was a marvelous way for me to learn how to deal with both sides.

As we stepped into Appa YG's office, we still continued our conversation except when my eyes landed on the two figures sitting adjacent to Appa YG's singular seat.

I stammered, not believing my eyes, "M-mom...D-dad..."

I felt tears well up at the corners of my eyes. Looking at the images of my two parents with their weak smiles and worrying eyes made me truly realize how much I missed them, how much I missed America, how much I missed...my former life.

"Mindy, you look so skinny," my mother croaked out. She also tried to hold back her tears. The members and Appa YG sat on the other side of the coffee table and looked to each other.

Appa YG stood up. "Would you like some time alone with your parents, Mindy?" he asked.

I silently nodded. My father looked up to me. "What did he say?" my father asked in English.

A sudden wave of nostalgia overcame me. It had been such a long time since I've spoken English; it felt so strange in my mouth.

"He said he'll leave us for a few minutes," I answered my dad.

As the members and president walked out of the room, they sent me a reassuring smile. When the door closed behind them, I turned to my parents. We stared at each other for a minute. And suddenly I burst out in tears and ran into their arms.

"I'm so sorry," I sobbed. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you soon enough...that I didn't talk to you about this. I'm just so...lost."

They pulled me closer and enveloped me in their tears. My father stroked my hair as he sniffled.

"It's alright, sweetheart," my mom answered, quickly brushing away a tear. We pulled away and I sat down with them on the couch. My mom held onto my hand.

"How have you been?" I asked, laughing when my father reached for a tissue off of Appa YG's desk.

My mom shook her head. "We've been fine. It's just you...God damn, you look terrifyingly skinny."

"You're exaggerating," I answered. "I've been working out and eating much more than I ate in America."

My father grabbed my other hand. "You look very healthy, Mindy. Forget your physical health. How are you here?" He pointed to his chest where the heart should be.

"I..." I stared at their concerned looks. "I'm scared to step into this...that's the truth. Without you, I've been questioning whether I should..."

"Mindy, you make the decision," my mom told me. "We are only here to guide and support you."

My dad squeezed my hand. I stared at them, doubting. "But that means I leave everything behind...I leave you two."

"You're not leaving us," my mom smiled. "You're moving on...and as much as it hurts us..." She turned to my father. "...we have to end up letting go one day. And now is the day..."

"We have three suitcases filled with your things at our hotel room," my father informed.

"Dad!" I exclaimed, startled.

He shook his head with a smile. "It's time. You got the opportunity and you should go on with it."

I stared at my parents' loving smiles. They flew over the Pacific Ocean to tell me it was alright to take a new path in my life. And it felt like this time it was official; I was going to be a YG idol.

Appa YG and the members came back into the room and we talked about the conditions and boring stuff my mother and father listened too. After that, I took my parents out for dinner with at a nice little restaurant in downtown Seoul and showed them around what would be my new home.

"Sweetheart, we're going to leave tomorrow morning," my mom told me as we walked out of a boutique store. I stopped eating my ice cream and looked to my parents.

"Wh-what? Why so early?" I stammered.

My parents looked at each other. "We want you to learn how to work everything on your own...without us," my father said. "And we have a lot of work...just like you."

I stared at them, knowing that this was the right way to deal with things. For however long, I was going to work without my parents constantly by my side and the soon enough, the more practice I would get...and the better I will be.

I spent the night at the hotel with my parents, spending all the time I could with my parents before they let me go. The next morning, we drove out to the airport where we met the Big Bang members who wore disguises. Before they stepped into the checking station, they turned to me.

"Be careful, sweetheart. Eat well. Sleep lots. Keep your health and don't work too hard," my mom told me.

I wrapped my arms around her, squeezing my eyes shut from the tears. I turned to my dad and wrapped my arms around him. "You will be amazing, darling," he praised me. We pulled back. "I can't wait to see you on TV."

Tears began falling as they stared at me, holding back their own tears. "I love you so much. I'll see you soon," I cried to them.

My father quickly turned to Jiyong and said, "Please take care of my daughter." Jiyong nodded his head furiously and said, "Yes sir."

My parents and I exchanged hugs once last time and they left. I quickly wiped my eyes but the tears broke through. Jiyong came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me.

"It's not forever," he said into my ear. "You'll be fine."

I turned around as he let go to face all of the members as I brushed away the remaining tears. "Come on," I smiled. "We have work to do." And I set off the start a new chapter of my life.

By 4PM, Jiyong and I were completely finished with Thorns and all that was left was Appa YG's final approval. I went to the styling rooms to change into my outfit for the interview at 5. I chose a simple violet dress and a leather jacket with hunter boots.

Fortunately, Hye Ri did my make up for me and I didn't see Jae Min at all. I drove with my driver to the interview place for MBC and met a pretty young lady who interviewed me. My hands kept shaking out of nervousness so I fidgeted with my necklace to hide it. Luckily, it was easy to talk to the lady and I knew it wasn't live so I finished my first interview as an idol quickly. When I came home to the Big Bang hostel, I found they were off to do a show so I made myself dinner, took a shower, then 뻑이가요 (knock out).

When I closed my eyes, I was met with glaring and flashing lights moving around a dark enclosed area. I found I was on a stage and thousands of fans were staring up at me in complete silence. I looked down to find I was holding a microphone and the outfit I wore to the interview. Instinctively, I brought the microphone up to my mouth.

"Annyeongseo. I'm Mindy-ssi. It's great that you came here to see me," I told the silent audience. And they stayed that way. The microphone shook in my hand and I felt sweat line my scalp. "I'll just sing now."

The spotlight landed on me and the music started. As I began singing, the single boo was heard. Soon enough, it grew into a loud roar of disapproval. I stopped and started at the crowd, shooting arrows of hatred through my heart. I started backing to the backstage but I turned around to find that my stage had shrunk to an island and I was surrounded by haters. The boos overpowered my ears but it didn't matter; the sound of my heart beating was louder.

As the stadium roared with hatred, I felt myself slip off of the shrinking stage and into the arms of the angry fans asking for Big Bang's stage back. I woke up with the sheets tangled in between my legs and my messy hair tangled with sweat. It took me a while to calm my beating heart and come to my senses.

I quickly got out of bed and went to the roof to take a breath. It was so scary; to be faced with hatred so strong. I couldn't help but think that my nightmare might become a reality at the music festival...a week from now.

"Why do you always seem to be awake in the middle of the night?" a voice asked beside me.

I looked up to find Jiyong in his bunny PJ pants and GD&TOP hoodie.

"I should be asking you the same," I replied.

"I had to pee," he told me as he took a seat next to me.

"That's always a pleasure to hear at 3 AM in the morning." I pulled my knees to my chest and laid my head on them, covering up the tears left from the nightmare.

Jiyong copied me and turned to me, concerned. "Did you not sleep?"

"No," I answered. "I slept."

"Why are you out here?" he asked me. I lifted my head and stared at the tall skyscrapers on Seoul.

"A week from now...I'm going to be an idol but...it doesn't feel right," I told him.

"Hey...You are the perfect material for an idol. How many times do I have to tell you? What are you worried about?"

I still stared at the skyscrapers. "I know why you call your fans VIPs." I said in English, "Very important person." I continued in Korean, "Every single fan is important. Without them, what is Big Bang?"

"Nothing," we both said.

"Now, what is an idol without their fans? What am I without fans?" I turned to him. "You've seen what they say about me. Do you think I can have the sufficient amount of fans to be successful?"

"You gain fans as you keep growing as an idol," Jiyong said. "I doubt I can grow at all with that hatred," I muttered, turning back to the skyscrapers.

Jiyong grabbed my chin and turned it so that I could lay eye contact with him. "Look, it's going to be hard especially with all the unfortunate things that's been going on with you. But you have to promise me something right now."

I stared deeply into his brown eyes. I couldn't help but wanting to fall deeper and deeper... "What is it?" I whispered.

He gripped my hand. "Don't run away." He grasped it harder. "As hard as it becomes, don't run away. I'm here. The members are here. The president is here. Run to us. But don't run away." He brushed a stray piece of hair out of my face. "Because whatever you have to deal with, you don't have to deal with yourself."

Kwon Jiyong leaned and slightly brushed his lips against mine. It was light, soft, and friendly but I felt an urge for more. Instead, I pulled back and stared at his serious expression. I gripped his hand this time.

"I promise."


	14. Chapter 14

The next morning I woke up to someone lightly shaking my leg. As I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, Seungri's smiling face appeared.

"Heyyyyy wake up, Mindy," he said. "It's time to get up."

I stretched out my arms as I sat up in bed. Seungri stood up and exited my room out into the kitchen. I followed suit to find that no one had waken up yet other than Seungri and me. I walked over to where he was pouring himself a glass of water.

"Uh...oppa. Where are the others?" I asked.

"Still sleeping," Seungri replied.

I glared at him. "Why did you wake me up when no one else is awake? What time is it exactly?!" I looked to the clock on the microwave. "Six?! You woke me up at six?! We go to YG at 8:30! We don't need to wake up this early!" I protested.

Seungri pulled out a pan and some eggs. "But I want you to make breakfast for me first," he answered. I gaped at him in amazement. Seungri would wake me up an hour early just to make him breakfast.

"Wow...this is wow...fantastic. Great," I stammered. I turned 180 towards my room. "I going back to sleep."

Seungri quickly grabbed my arm. "Baby~ I need you."

I turned around and covered my face. "Please don't. If you call me baby one more time-"

"Baby..." he whimpered.

I sighed, rolled my eyes and took the pan from his hand. "Honestly, you could have just asked me nicely instead of just randomly waking me up," I scolded him.

"Yeah, whatever. You ended up making me breakfast anyway," he laughed sitting down at the table.

I lifted an egg as a threat. "Do you want to die?"

Daesung came out of his room with hair like a bird's nest and squinting eyes. "What's with the death threat...?"

"What's with the noise...?" Taeyang asked coming out of the room behind Daesung.

"Why are you all awake?" TOP asked as he walked out of his room with Jiyong hanging onto his arm.

"Mindy is making breakfast," Seungri said.

"What?" I looked up from the pan. "I-I...Seungri told me..."

"You're only making breakfast for Seungri? How about me?" TOP asked offended. He grabbed Jiyong's shoulders and moved him over to the couch.

"Ay, hyung. We didn't get any breakfast from Mindy at all," Daesung complained.

"Why don't you make us all breakfast, Mindy?" Jiyong muttered into the couch. I stared at all of their pleading eyes and Jiyong's face-plant on the couch. You couldn't say no to that especially since Jiyong tried so hard to be awake.

"Fine," I muttered.

They all quickly assembled at the table and I made all them a simple breakfast of rolled eggs. After breakfast, we got ready for a day of work. I accidentally stepped into Jiyong's closet instead of my room so I was faced with racks upon racks of clothing and I couldn't keep back my urge to just look through all of them. I found a low cut over sized dark blue shirt that I had to try on but before I could steal it and escape into my room,

Jiyong came in wearing a robe and nothing else. He backed all the way to the door in surprise. "Mindy. Oh my God. What are you doing in here?" he exclaimed.

I lifted up the shirt, guilty. "Shopping," I answered.

"But that's mine..." he protested. "Yeah..." I said. "But I'm an idol now and everything so I've got to dress a little differently...and-"

Jiyong stared at me with a frightened expression. "Yeah, okay. Just please..."

I flashed him a smile, lightly slapped his cheek on the way out, and skipped into my room to pull on an outfit of the blue shirt, black leggings, white high-tops, and a baggy creme colored cardigan. I also pulled my hair into a bun. When I came out of my room, the members were waiting for me.

"Here, Mindy," Taeyang said, handing me a pair of sunglasses. "These are your very first pair of shades to hide your face in case there are any cameras."

"Congratulations!" Jiyong exclaimed.

He had gotten over the fright of me in his closet and looked much cleaner and crisper. They all cheered for me. Seungri used the Polaroid to take a picture of me posing with my new glasses on and handed me the picture.

"Now you could put it up on our YG Polaroid wall," TOP told me.

When we reached the building, they showed me where the bulletin was for the Polaroids were. I glanced over the many pictures of my YG family on the wall and felt a sense of great pride when I pinned my first picture with a tack. I didn't linger too long because we began practicing for the music festival. But the feeling lasted.

Each night I closed my eyes, I was met with the roaring crowd of hatred. Soon enough, I became sleep deprived and it began showing on my face and in my actions. The members became so worried; they all asked for me to sit on the couch while they sat on the floor in front me to "talk about my feelings". I only found it scarier because their blank faces looked similar to the repeating blank faces in my nightmare.

"Come on, Mindy," Taeyang pleaded. "Just say it. Tell us everything."

"I told you everything last night, remember? Nothing changes except it gets scarier and scarier..." I muttered.

Jiyong let out a sigh of frustration and laid his head on his knees.

"What do you mean it gets scarier?" TOP asked.

"The festival is coming closer each day," Daesung answered for me. "Of course, it would get worse."

"What are we going to do? What if you don't get any sleep before the festival? It will be a disaster!" Seungri exclaimed.

"It's not what you guys can do..." I told them. "It's what I can do. Look, I'm so thankful for your concern but I need to deal with this by myself."

I stood up and walked into my room, closing my door. As amazing as the members could be, it was absurd for them to solve my internal problem for themselves. I needed to get over it by myself before the festival, which was three days away. I had to find a way. I sat in front of the keyboard I borrowed from Jiyong and played a few notes and chords.

I sang softly:

"I'm so scared.

I'm so scared of blank, ghostlike faces,

Filled with hatred to the brim...

Ready to overflow, And break me into pieces."

With the time I spent awake in the middle of night, I began secretly writing lyrics about my nightmares. The lyrics and music were okay but I never planned to show it to anyone. It wasn't that great to begin with and if I put too much feeling into lyrics...my listeners later on might assume things.

Jiyong knocked on my door and peeked in. I quickly moved from the keyboard to my laptop. Luckily, he didn't noticed.

"I'm going to the YG building to do some stuff. Want to come along?" he offered.

I smiled and snooker my head at him. "No thank you," I told him.

His face fell. "Alright...go to sleep if you can..." Then he left.

Honestly, I felt weird with Jiyong since the night on the room so I tried to not be alone with him too much. I pulled on the YG page and read the comments on the new detail Appa YG released about me today. Reading through them twice over, it wasn't that bad. They were all mostly curious to know who I was and how good I was. But the comments that were filled hatred stung and made me envision the blank, hating faces again.

TOP stepped into my room and sat on the edge of my bed. "Mindy..." he said.

"Yes, oppa?" I replied as I scrolled down the page. He went over next to me on the laptop and sat on the desk.

"It's been a long time since we've really talked. Do you still wear the bracelet?" he asked. I rolled up the sleeve of my sweater to show him the thin blue bracelet with metal beads. He grinned and pulled up his sleeve to show his. "Let's go on a walk," TOP offered.

"Why?" I looked at the clock. "It's late."

"I think we both need to take a breather," he suggested. "Seungri got my favorite Bear Brick dirty so I really need to just..." He sighed.

I laughed. "Alright. Alright."

We ended up walked around this park near their house. We were silent most of the time.

Suddenly, TOP spoke up. "I know you were trying to hide it but I heard you sing something for the past few days." I blushed and looked away. "I know I shouldn't be asking this but...can I hear it?"

I took a seat on a bench. "I don't know. I wasn't planning to share it with anyone and...I don't know if it's that good."

"Well, that's why you share it," TOP chuckled. He took a seat next to me.

I sighed and looked at a distant flickering lamp post. "I guess..." TOP turned to me and smiled for me to start. And I did, hesitantly. I got through the song and at the end, he clapped happily.

"That was amazing, Mindy," he praised. "You should put that into your album."

"It's about what I dream about..." I muttered, "every single night."

"I know," TOP said. "Can I tell you something?" I nodded my head. "I had the same thing happen to them before our debut. Except I wasn't that I couldn't sleep, but I kept freaking out while singing and stopping all together."

"And how did you deal with it?" I asked.

"I didn't." He turned to me and started playing with my hair. "It ended when I first stepped into the stage and seeing the excited audience. I just knew then that it would be fine. And I hope the same happens for you." He leaned into a little closer. "You are a beautiful young woman with an amazing voice and such a strong determination. It would be absolutely stupid if anyone...in this entire world would shoot you down."

My heart beat against my chest as I realized TOP was incredibly close to me. He had stopped playing with my hair but left his hand there.

"In any event, you are beyond talented and even if the whole world hated you, you can learn to love yourself," he whispered.

And he was too close. But I didn't lean back.

"And I can learn to love you..."

My mind went blank as he pressed his lips against mine. All that went through my mind was how amazing it felt for TOP to be so close to me. But as soon as it happened, I thought of how close Jiyong was to kissing me and suddenly pulled back. TOP looked disappointed for a second and then concerned.

"Oh God," he said. "I shouldn't have done that. I'm so sorry, Mindy."

I couldn't form words so I stared at him, speechless. Why? What was so wrong with kissing TOP? I felt sweat at my hairline. It was the fact that I thought of Jiyong instead... I ran my fingers through my hair. TOP had a sad, forlorn and equally guilty look on his face.

"It's late..." I finally said. "We should go back and sleep."

He nodded in agreement although he still looked sad. We walked the rest of the way home in silence. Before stepping into the house, TOP stopped me. "Hey, Mindy," he said.

I tried hard to make eye contact with him so it wouldn't be so awkward. "Just forget about it...I know I shouldn't have." I tried to pull on a joking expression so we wouldn't feel so awkward about it. "You're asking me to forget a kiss from Choi Seunghyun, one of the kings of K-pop?" I scoffed. "Fat chance."

He looked worried for a second and then realized I was joking. TOP smiled, opened the door for me, and said, "After you, my lovely chingu."

I slept for only three hours that night and it wasn't because of the nightmares even if they were there. I laid in my bed staring at the ceiling thinking about TOP's lingering kiss and Jiyong's sweet, soft peck. It was all so confusing to me. One side of me wanted to lean into TOP and continue kissing him; the other side wanted to run into Jiyong's arm and be the one to initiate the kiss.

The question ended up being: why did they kiss me? It wasn't obvious that they liked me in an intimate way. But it would make sense that it wouldn't be obvious since they have to hide everything behind a mask for the cameras anyway. Either way, I had myself asking myself: did they kiss me because they liked me or they just felt obliged to...to make me feel better about myself?

I slapped my cheeks in frustration. Oh my goodness, what would happen if they both liked me? It would be chaos. Complete, absolute destruction of the band because it seemed to me that at the moment, I wouldn't be able to choose between the both of them. It would have been so much easier if one of them were uglier than the other. Dammit. They were both so gorgeous...

The next few days, I practiced for the music festival and tried to keep my distance with the two and talked much more with the other members. At least they didn't show any signs of wanting to kiss me. While we ran over the dance by ourselves, Seungri approached me.

"Hi Mindy," he smiled. I smiled back at him.

"What is up, Seungri-ah?"

"Hmm nothing," he replied. We stayed silent for a moment while we practiced our moves. Suddenly, he asked, "Are...you avoiding Jiyong hyung?"

I almost slipped over my left balance but regained my senses. "No! N-no! Why would you think that? I-I would never!" I sputtered.

Seungri shrugged. "I don't know. It just looks like it..."

He moved away to take a drink. As I looked over, I found Jiyong smiling at me and quickly turned away as my cheeks turned pink.

The day before the music festival, we practiced at the concert hall to check the sound and stage. As I stood on the stage staring down at Se7en, Teddy, and Appa YG watching, my mind flashed to the scary emotionless faces in my nightmares. I was about to run off the stage but took a breath and began rehearsals.

On my entrance for Thorns, I would jump up from the stage lift for a cool "pop-out" move. The first time I tested it out, I ended up unstable after the jump so that I began falling backwards. Luckily, mysterious, strong arms caught me. I turned around to find Jiyong with his arms around me to keep my balance. I quickly hopped back to stability and out of his arms.

"Thanks oppa!" I exclaimed, ready to turn back to trying the jump again. Instead, Jiyong grabbed my shoulders and positioned me on the lift.

"Let me show some tricks to not look like a flying monkey coming up," he offered.

I pouted. "I didn't know I resembled that kind of animal so much."

"Mm...the only difference is less fur," he chuckled. "Alright. Follow my movements." At first, I was hesitant but followed Jiyong. "When you feel the push, bend your knees and stick out your butt," he advised and demonstrated. I followed him. "Stick out your butt as much as possible to brace your feet."

He stuck his rear even more. Daesung and Taeyang were cracking up from the stairs on the stage.

"Jiyong," Taeyang exclaimed. "You look like you're going to take a really big dump." Jiyong wiggled his butt to tease them. I tried the jump another time with Jiyong's technique and was successful in making an awesome looking jump except I would have to hold down my dress when I jumped. Halfway through rehearsal, Appa YG called me over.

"I heard you were having sleeping problems, Mindy-ssi."

"Ah...Jiyong oppa must have told you," I said.

"Mhm," Appa YG replied. "Just relax as much as you can or even nap during the day. You just need to clear your mind as much as possible. Hwaiting!"

"Thank you, Appa YG," I answered, bowing.

I was about to walk away when Appa YG raised his eyebrows at me and said, "Is there anything else one your mind?"

"Noooo..." I answered. He nodded, smiling and turned back to the members rehearsing on stage. I walked away quickly thinking to myself: did Appa YG know? Did Jiyong tell him? Appa YG didn't say anything else to me other than a few pointers on stage performance and rehearsal ended at 6 PM.

The members and I had a nice dinner at their favorite eel restaurant and we headed home to get to sleep early for the big day. Before going to bed with everyone in their PJ's, Jiyong called a meeting in the living room. I took a seat on the bean bag next to Seungri and stared at Jiyong you looked like he was about to make a speech.

"Yo~" he greeted. "Tomorrow is the day our dear Mindy will debut as the awesomest idol Korea-I mean America- has to offer. Let's hear it for Mindy!"

The members cheered and Jiyong continued, looking at me straight in the eyes," I know ever since you stepped into Korea, you've gone a crazy roller coaster. We hope that you would hold on tight and end up enjoying the ride. We believe in you, Mindy. And love you with all our hearts." He opened his arms for me.

"Oh..." I pointed to myself. "I'm supposed to...Oh, alright." I hurried over to Jiyong and wrapped my arms around his waist. Soon enough, we were joined by the other members and I was once again suffocated. The members shouted praises and compliments as they squeezed the life out of me.

Eventually, they let go and went to their rooms to go to bed. We wished each other good night as we passed each other. Jiyong passed by me and stopped.

"Mindy," he said. I stopped and stared into his beautiful eyes and I wanted to stare into them forever. "Don't run away," he whispered.

I nodded, understanding. Out of the blue, he lightly pressed his lips on my cheek and disappeared into the room. It was so quick, I doubted it ever happened but the lingering feeling told it all. As I felt reality slip away from me as I laid in my bed, a cloud of confusion drove me into sleep.

Jiyong...or TOP?

That night, I slept but struggled with my nightmares once again. This time, it was worst it has been, which made sense since my debut was the day after. I woke up in the middle of the night once again. It was so normal already so I got out of bed and got a glass of water and went out to the roof to take a breath.

I didn't notice Jiyong until he laced his fingers around mine. I looked over to him. His hair stood up in odd angles and his eyes still had sleep in them. I realized that he was out here to keep me company even if it was taking away his sleep.

"Jiyong oppa," I said, "...you don't have to be here with me."

He smiled at me. "I want to. I've been worrying about you so it's been hard to sleep too..."

I glared at him and said, "No! What? There isn't anything to worry about."

"Are they getting worse?" he asked.

I looked down at my toes. "The worst this night."

Jiyong sighed, frustrated. "I don't know what I can do."

"You don't have to do anything," I told him. I stood up with my fingers still link through his. "I'll just go back to sleep and get some sleep in if I can."

"But...your nightmares..." he protested.

"I'll fight through them," I smiled. "Oppa..." I instinctively reached out to brush a few strands of his hair out of a knot. "I'll be fine."

Jiyong wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pulled me in for a tight hug. He kissed the top of my head as I leaned in close, inhaling the sweet scent of Jiyong. We stayed like that for a while before letting go and stepping back into the house.

TOP looked up at us from when we entered the house. His face was first confused then startled. I realized what it looked like after it was too late. TOP tried to play it cool by putting down the glass of water and pulling on a smile to cover up his previous expression.

"How are you guys?" he asked.

I stammered, "I was just about to go back to sleep..." Out of the corner of my eye, TOP held a clenched fist at his side, trying to conceal it.

"Oh," he answered. "Good night."

I wished him a goodnight along with Jiyong and walked back into my room. I barely heard the words Jiyong and TOP were saying but I knew it wasn't great. I ended up falling asleep to fast whispered words coming from the kitchen. The next morning, the six of us went to the site of the music festival and rehearsed with a few more Kpop groups.

Jiyong and TOP tried to distance themselves the whole time, not saying a word to each other. TOP must have thought something was between Jiyong and I so that it seemed like I pushed TOP away. In a sense, it would be considered like that but it was never my intention. Now I was left with two unhappy members. I practiced my jump once again and everything seemed fine.

Soon enough, I was at the dressing table with Hye Ri putting on my makeup and clothes. Minutes later I was rushed to the bottom of the stage where I was going to jump up with the lift. Jae Min suddenly appeared next to me with a flashlight and a stack of non-makeup remover napkins.

"Hey, Mindy," she greeted. "This way."

The members ran past me with sweat running down the sides of their faces. They all sent me a thumbs up or a smile as Jae Min and I passed them. I found it really strange for Jae Min to be leading me to my lift but I didn't argue since we needed to rush there to be on schedule.

When we reached the lift, Jae Min carefully positioned me. "Good luck, Mindy-ssi!" she said and I was off.

The second I was raised up, I already felt that the lift was unbalanced but I followed through with Jiyong's instructions and hoped for best. Which wasn't that great. The moment I landed, I felt a great deal of pain shoot up from my right ankle all the way up my leg. Despite wanting to cry out in pain, I brought the microphone to my lips and began strutting down the stage with my surely injured ankle.

"Annyeongseo, I'm Mindy-ssi!" I screamed out.

Suddenly, a burst of anxiety rushed through me, afraid that I would be met with the blank ghostlike expressions once again but this time in reality.

I was shocked with a load roar of enthusiasm in reply. I quickly glanced around the auditorium to find that almost everyone was standing and waving their glowsticks in support for me and I found strength. Standing under the bright spotlight with my now throbbing ankle, I never felt so strong or so confident. At that moment, I knew that I was meant for this.

So I ignored how painful my ankle was and continued on. "1! 2! 3! 4!," I exclaimed.

And the music started. With every beat and every step, I sung and danced my best. Of course, the audience began to notice my injured ankle but I continued on, fighting the pain. When the song ended, it was almost impossible to take the pain from my ankle. I choked out a "kansamnida" to the roaring audience. I didn't take notice since all I wanted was to get off the stage and sit.

The music for Somebody to Love began and the members ran up the stage to exist me. I grind my teeth together and fought through the song but halfway through, I felt like I was going to collapse. Seeing this, the choreography stopped and TOP and Jiyong rushed to each side of me and supported me. I still sang and I still put a smile of my face but as soon as the song ended, I muttered a last thank you and rushed off the stage with Jiyong and TOP still supporting me.

When we reached backstage, I fell against a chair and groaned in pain. "Oh my God," I cried in English, gritting my teeth. The members and the YG staff surrounded me.

"What happened?" Taeyang demanded to a staff member of the stage.

"I don't know! The lift was somehow unbalanced and once side didn't lift up to be equal to the height of stage..." he replied.

Seungri shook his head," How could this have happened?"

"It doesn't matter," Daesung cried. "We need to get her to the hospital.

Mindy has been secretly working under YG as a trainee for the past 2 weeks after the president accidentally stumbled on her singing on a visit to Big Bang. Big Bang's G-Dragon has been closely working with Mindy to create this sensational song.

Nonetheless, Mindy's strong determination and fortitude won the hearts of many in Korea. Her track on iTunes reached 24,000 downloads in the past hour. We applaud Mindy's overpowering success and await her next comeback."

I couldn't believe my ears. Despite my weakness because of my injured ankle, the response on my debut was awesome beyond words. Sae Kyung couldn't hold in her excitement. She began clapping. "I'm so proud of you, Mindy-ssi. Gosh, this is almost as awesome as Big Bang's debut!"

"So..." I started rubbing an itchy spot on my cast. "...what's going to happen next?"

"Well...I'm going to leave Sae Kyung to organize the events you're going to attend and the next big thing will be the YG Family Concert." Appa YG smiled. "Why don't you collab with Jiyong or TOP to create a new song? You seem to work well with them."

I laughed nervously. "O-of course. But yeah well...how am I going to practice for the concert with this thing." I pointed to my cast.

"You'll be fine," Appa YG replied. He looked to a computer screen on his desk. "Your Big Bang boys are coming up here so get out of my office and meet up with them."

I raised my eyebrows. "How do you know...?"

"I have access to all the cameras in the building," he simply stated.

"Oh yeah...that's right," I said. I stood up with the help of Sae Kyung and then bowed the both of them. "Thank you. I'll be going now."

When I came out into the hallway to the elevators and found the members coming up to me with sweat dripping down their faces.

"My oppas!" I yelled happily, attempting to raise my arms.

Jiyong rushed to me and grabbed me by my waist and pulled me close. "Are you alright?" he asked.

"Y-yes," I stammered, pushing him away gently.

It was too late, TOP had already registered it in his eyes that he didn't like it one bit. To try to make things better, I smiled to the rest of the members. "Come here, you bastards."

Seungri enveloped me first with TOP last. I felt something different about his hug like he was trying as hard as possible not to touch me, but still with a loving caring way.

Taeyang patted my head lightly. "That was the best performance the whole night!" he complimented. "I had chills."

Daesung crouched down to my ankle. "May I be the first to sign it?" he asked.

"Oh, please." I laughed and looked down at him. "Who would think Kang Daesung would sign my cast...?"

"So what did they say about your ankle?" Seungri asked offering for me to lean on him. I accepted his offer.

"I couldn't get a hot pink cast..." I answered.

He laughed. "I'll talk to them again if you want. Or we can find something stylish for you so it could fit your concept."

"Yes yes! That's an awesome idea!" I smiled.

I looked to TOP but he didn't say anything. He only sent me a weak smile. Jiyong, on the other hand, took my bag and danced around to make me smile. A side of my heart wanted to reach out to TOP but I couldn't...really I couldn't. We drove back to the hostel and each had a glass of champagne in celebration.

"We're sorry we couldn't have a real party for your debut since well...you couldn't party normally," Taeyang apologized.

Jiyong laughed, "And I don't think alcohol is the right solution for you right now."

I couldn't hold in my tears and fell down my face. "Gosh..." I sniffled. "I can't believe I'm here. I can't put into words the feelings I'm feeling right now. All I know is that I don't want it to stop."

"I think I can say this for all the members," Jiyong said, "We love you, Mindy. And congratulations."

We attempted a group hug but it ended up with me just stumbling so after cleaning up, we got ready for bed. Somehow, TOP and I ended alone in the living room. He was about to go to his room when I called him back.

"Oppa..." I said. He turned around. "You've been so quiet. Is it because..." I didn't need to say it because he already knew.

He slightly smiled, sadly. "Congratulations, Mindy."

And he turned around and walked on to leave me in the room alone.


	15. Chapter 15

The next few weeks became the busiest time I've ever experienced. The morning after my debut, I met up with Sae Kyung who took close to the whole night planning out my schedule for the next 2 MONTHS. I had a live interview that afternoon at 3PM and after that, a performance at 7PM. Not only that, I was going to begin my music video filming and concert rehearsals around my already packed schedule.

Before going to my interview, I found TOP about to walk out of the building. I quickly attempted to run up to him. "Oppa!" I called to him. He turned around with a blank expression. He didn't say anything when I caught up with him so I said, "I didn't see you this morning."

"I had a meeting and I went training," he answered blandly.

"Where are you going now?" I asked.

He looked down at his phone. "Home," TOP replied.

I smiled awkwardly. "Why don't you come with me to my interview?"

"Is it because Ji...because the other members are busy?" he asked bitterly.

I was taken aback by his question but quickly recovered my smile. I linked my arm around his and handed him one of my crutch.

"It's my first ever live interview. I'm going to need some moral support," I told him. TOP stared down at my eyes and I looked up, struggling to keep the smile on my face. He looked so lost and miserable; it made me feel like a monster. "Come on," I laughed and pulled him to the car to drive us to the interview center. "This is the least you can do," I said.

"So what's the most?" he asked as he climbed onto the car.

I climbed in after him with his help. "Do the interview for me."

He laughed for the first time since a night ago. It was so great to hear as it sent shivers down my back. When I reached the interview center, there was a live audience and cameras everywhere. As I stood backstage, I looked to the audience on the stands and took a shaky breath.

"You weren't nervous about your debut but you're nervous about a mere interview?" TOP chuckled behind me.

I looked back at him. "It's different. I put up an act onstage. Here, I am whoever I am."

"That reminds me," TOP said, "have you been having any nightmares?"

My eyebrows furrowed when I realized I slept soundly last night. "No...I haven't."

"There it is..." He smiled, knowingly.

A backstage worker came up to me and told me I would be on in a minute. I turned to TOP nervously as I breathed heavily in and out. TOP reached out to fix a lock of my hair.

"Just be yourself," he said. "Like you're talking to me. I'll be right here."

I nodded smiling at him. And I was on. I walked on with my crutches and the crowd cheered-no, roared with enthusiasm. I put on my brightest smile and uneasily sat down on the couch and positioned my black and dark red zebra striped cast to a comfortable position with my red skirt and black quarter sleeve plain black shirt. I quickly glanced over to TOP who winked at me. I turned back to the interviewer, confident.

The interviewer asked simple questions like how I managed to get into YG, my thoughts on my debut and my injury, and how I came up with Thorns. We eventually came up with questions about my interests and such.

"Mindy-ssi," the interviewer said, "it's said that you did admit that you are a VIP so if you were to choose one member as your favorite, who would it be?"

I laughed nervously. "I wouldn't like to choose at all. I love all of them equally but...well," l smiled shyly. "Well...I grew to like all of them. But I started out with a bias."

"And who would that be?" she asked.

"TOP oppa," I answered and lowered my head in embarrassment. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw TOP laugh.

"Ah yes, TOP-ssi is a very likable person. But is there any specific reason why...he started out as your bias?"

I quickly glance up to TOP at the edge of backstage. "Well, it wasn't only the looks that caught my attention. It was also his personality. His...innocence and childlike behavior and him being the eldest out of five! He never fails to make me laugh..." I looked directly at TOP now. "And...he's a real role model and I'm not saying this as if the other members aren't role models themselves but TOP oppa...doesn't use his body to show his beauty and that's something I look up to."

The interviewer nodded and smile in agreement but I still stared at TOP who returned my stare with a blank, surprised expression.

"But all of us do wonder when this man will reveal his body, is that right?" the interviewer continued.

I tore my eyes away from him and turned back to the interviewer as the audience screamed their agreement. The interview ended and I was helped backstage by TOP who didn't say a word until we were alone.

"I wasn't aware I was your bias," he chuckled.

He had his hand in my lower back to guide me and it was all I could do to stop the urge to just collapse and injure myself even further.

Suddenly, he whispered into my ear, "Hey, let's get out of here."

I took a step back, finding the suggestion was somewhat...suggestive. "What do you mean by that?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe ice cream? On me?" I rolled my eyes. "Oppa...you and ice cream. Okay. How about me recently debuting and you being the sexiest man in Korea?"

"Well, that's what hoodies and sunglasses are for," he said, handing me the pair of shades Taeyang gave me.

I smiled at his mischievous idea and accepted the glasses and found a hoodie. I told my driver to take two hours off and TOP and I began our adventure.

We ended up at a small ice cream shop not far from downtown Seoul and took a walk around the park-well, I didn't walk exactly. I sort of...hobbled. TOP fed me his ice cream since I couldn't do it myself with my crutches. We ended up talking about what I had said in the interview.

"I'm not that surprised actually," TOP said. I looked at him puzzled. He laughed. "I would expect you to pick me."

I gaped at him. "This boy! It doesn't even mean anything. I like all of the members equally now anyway."

"But you started out with me which means I still am significant," he said. I shrugged.

"Meh. Not really."

TOP gestured for me to open my mouth as he held out a spoonful of ice cream. I obeyed but he ended up pushing the spoon into my nose.

"Oppa!" I shrieked.

He shrugged and laughed. "Woops."

"I would get you back but I'm handicapped right now," I answered glaring at him.

"I'm sorry," he said still laughing. He took the napkin and began dabbing the smeared ice cream on my face. Suddenly, he became serious. "Mindy...do you have feelings for Jiyong?"

My heart began beating faster. I just couldn't answer straight out that I liked Jiyong because I liked the BOTH of them. I had no idea how to answer without making the situation worse.

"Does it matter?" I asked.

TOP returned back to his ice cream. "To me it does." He dropped his hand and turned to me to stare directly into my eyes. "Can I just know...?"

I was struggling with my answer and right before I was about to answer, my phone rang. I quickly leaned against TOP to take out my phone to find Jiyong calling. TOP quickly looked away. I answered the call.

"Hey, Jiyong oppa," I answered still leaning onto TOP. He looked depressed suddenly.

"Hey Mindy. How was your interview?" Jiyong's sweet unique voice sounded in my ear.

I looked over to TOP as I answered, "I think it went spectacular."

"So where are you now?" His voice sounded as if he already knew.

"I'm out with TOP oppa. Why?" I replied.

Jiyong said, "Oh, well...I was just wondering and your next event is the performance so I got worried." He laughed nervously. "There are concert rehearsals before dinner so I think you should go."

"Of course," I answered.

He hesitated for a second. "I-I'll see you there..."

After we hung up, I turned to TOP suddenly frustrated. "I don't understand why you two don't just make up already," I demanded.

TOP threw the empty ice cream cup into the trash.

He shrugged. "We both have a feelings for you...It's natural...for..." TOP looked into my eyes again. "Look, Jiyong and I have to sort out our feelings for you and right now, it's not working."

"It hurts me to see you two like this," I muttered.

"It hurts me too," he said kicking a tree trunk. "Dammit. I just wanna take you out of here and run away together..."

He began walking in the direction we came in. I tried to catch up with him.

"Why is that every time...every time I give in my all," he muttered.

I caught up with him at the end of the park. He looked so frustrated and mad. It was a new side to him.

"I wish I could figure it out too, oppa," I whispered. "But I can't do this without you."

He didn't say anything the rest of the way back to the building. We met up with the family members in the band rehearsal room and began our YG Family rehearsing.

Every once in a while, Jiyong would look over to me and frown a little or when I looked, he would smile. TOP barely looked at me or Jiyong.

On our 5 minute break, I stepped out of the room and folks deep breath. How did I get caught in this web? I never meant to develop feelings for any of them. Yes, there were fan feelings but there feelings that had...they felt so real and dangerous.

Taeyang came out of the room and asked me, "Hey, Mindy. You look really stressed. What's wrong?"

I let it slip from my mouth before I had a second thought.

"I think I'm in love with Jiyong and TOP."

"Wow..." Taeyang breathed.

A scary thought escaped my lips, "Don't tell me you have feelings for me?"

He chuckled a little. "If I did, you wouldn't even be able to like me back."

"Oh my God!" I exclaimed, frightened.

Taeyang laughed and laid a hand on my shoulder to calm me. "Relax. I've got feelings for another."

I let out a breath of relief. "It's just..." I stammered. "They are both uncomfortable with each other now and it's not so good with the band and I just want everything to be how it was and oh my goodness..."

Taeyang raised his eyebrows. "You want everything to be how it was. You say it like you want to go back before you met us..."

I paused. Something in that sentence made me think bad things but I quickly shook it from my head. "No...Back when they were my best friends...not my lovers," I answered.

Taeyang smirked knowingly. "Idols are hired for their acting skills too, Mindy." He slipped his hands in his pockets. "Act like you have no feelings for them and that whatever happened between the three of you was an accident...something of the past."

"What do I do with this feud between..."

Taeyang started hopping on one leg and then the other. "They are on the line of friendship and love, honestly. Those two always end up figuring out their differences. But you could just have a long heartfelt conversation with the two as a group."

"Wow," I said. "That's really good advice."

He rolled his eyes. "I really don't understand why you would pour this out to a guy whose never had a girlfriend."

"Maybe it's because the less experienced are really the one with the real experience," I replied.

He laughed, "That made no sense at all." Taeyang opened the door for me.

"It sounded better in my head," I said as I walked back into the room.

We began rehearsals again but I had to leave early due to my performance. My driver drove me to the place and I sat down for makeup and hair. Jae Min hurried to me.

"Annyonghaseyo Mindy-ssi," she said begin layering foundation on my skin. "I honestly cannot get enough of 'Thorns'. It's beyond amazing."

"Thank you," I smiled.

I secretly looked at the foundation cover to see if it wasn't the foundation used for photo shoots. I let out a sigh of relief when I saw it wasn't. When Jae Min helped me into my accessories, she saw the blue bracelet TOP bought for me. Her eyes widened in surprise for a second then returned back to her normal pretty look.

"Would you like to take that bracelet out to put on the others? I wouldn't want something to clash with your costume," she offered.

I would want it to clash with my outfit rather than become ruined by Jae Min. So I smiled and shook my head. She slipped on the bracelets over to bracelet.

"I know it's wrong to ask but...is that the same bracelet as TOP oppa's?" she asked.

I smirked to myself. Could this girl be...jealous? I nodded my head and she looked away for a second then smiled.

"You two are quite the thing," Jae Min said.

I protested, "Oh no, we're just friends."

"Right!" Jae Min laughed.

I was ready to go onstage in the next 5 minutes.

Before going onstage, a stage worker told me, "If you forget your lyrics, they're on the screen at the edge of the stage in case. I'm sure you're familiar with it."

I nodded and thanked him. I honestly didn't know any use of it since I was so familiar with the song but it was good to have it there in case I just screw up. It was a live audience too. Surprisingly, a lot of people showed up and cheered for me loudly as I entered the stage.

So I began singing. Everything was going well. I sung on beat and in tune. I attempted to dance in my crutches when I had to. In the middle of the song, I accidentally glanced backstage where Jae Min waved at me. Instantly, I knew I had lost my momentum. Glad it was on a rest, I quickly looked to the lyrics screen and sang what it said.

It was already too late when I realized I sang the wrong lyrics. That was impossible though. The lyrics on the screen were what I sang...unless the lyrics on the screen was wrong. In any event, I took Jiyong's advice from a while ago and continued on like nothing went wrong. But I saw it in the audience's eyes that they knew I mess up.

After the song ended, I hobbled offstage and was congratulated by the staff even if I messed up and looked like a mess. I met up with Jae Min to help me out of my accessories.

She smiled at me. "That was a great performance, Mindy." But the smile was empty, almost demonic. As I sat down at my dressing table to take a breath from dancing in crutches, my phone rang. I looked down at my caller ID.

Jiyong.

"Hey, oppa," I answered nervously.

Jiyong answered, "Hey, Mindy. What happened up there?"

My heart flew to my throat. Jiyong had a thing to get the business right away. It made me feel terrible that I forgot the lyrics in the first place but mad that the lyrics there to guide me were tampered with.

"I forgot the lyrics," I replied.

"Yeah, you sang 'your voice is there in my pants'' when it should have been 'in my nightmares'. How did that happen?" Jiyong laughed.

"It's weird actually. I blanked on the lyrics for a moment so I looked to the screen and sang off of it. But the lyrics were wrong. Unless I'm reading wrong which could happen since I've only learned for 3 years...but could have happened if it was tampered with," I explained.

"Who could have tampered with it, Mindy? It takes a lot of computer knowledge," Jiyong answered.

I scratched my head and looked around. "Well..."

Jiyong interrupted me, "Mindy...I think it will be fine. Singers mess up all the time. I think we should talk about more important things."

I quickly stood up and told him, "Yes yes. I'm going to my music video site now."

"What...? No! You don't even have music video shooting today. I just wanted to ask you to dinner..." Jiyong replied.

I stopped on my tracks and felt my heart beat furiously beneath my chest. Was he asking me out on a date?

"You've been working so hard and I just wanted to let your mind breathe a little," he continued after I didn't say anything.

"Of course..." I answered. "I would love to come."

"Great! I'll meet you back home," he said.

When I got home to get ready, I found that none of the members were there. I found relief since TOP wasn't there to make me feel like a bastard. But it didn't matter. I still felt like one since I was leading both men on. What have I become? As I dragged out this drama, I hurt both of them even more.

Half of me wanted to stay at home so that I would figure how to stop this. But since I promised Jiyong, I go dressed simply but nicely. I stepped out of my room to find Jiyong in a nice dress shirt and black skinny jeans. He looked so nice and bright in it and I wanted to just forget all of my thoughts of before and run to him. But I couldn't.

"You look beautiful," he smiled.

"Thank you," I blushed.

He took my waist and escorted me to his car and we drove to a fancy secluded restaurant. When we got there, we were seated at a reserved table.

"Wow, oppa. This is amazing," I said.

There were candles and a centerpiece of beautiful flowers. The setting was also very nice with the tables spaced out. We sat underneath a pavilion in lamplight and candlelight.

"I wanted something special for someone special," Jiyong complimented.

I blushed and sat down as he pulled out my chair for me. Jiyong was about to sit down when he suddenly stopped. My eyes found TOP walking into the restaurant with a business man. I was about to tell Jiyong to turn away when TOP turned to face us. His eyes landed on me first and then Jiyong. I felt the tension in the air and I knew that wasn't it. TOP excused himself and then made his way to us.

When he reached us, he glared at Jiyong. "I've had enough of this." He turned to me. "Just tell me to stop and I will. I don't want to keep hanging on if I get treated like this."

"Oh come on, hyung," Jiyong said. "Don't be so harsh."

"Don't you realize what she's doing, Jiyong?" TOP said to him. "She's been stringing us on."

The way he said it sent a pang to my heart and all I wanted to do was to run. It was true. I had such a hard time deciding my feelings for the both of them; I left them both there in case I couldn't get the other. I was the monster here. And I had to fix it.

"I have," I admitted. "And..."

"So choose," TOP demanded. "Jiyong or me?"

I stared at their heartbroken faces and realized what I had to do. I had to choose. I took a deep breath knowing this was inevitable. And I knew what I had to say.

"I'm so sorry I did this...I never intended for it to go this far..." I looked into their eyes. "Right now, with this much going on...all I want is to go back when it was the six of us, not us separated. I'm so sorry that I made this all happen and I love the both of you very much. But what's more important is the friendship I have with the five members."

Jiyong and TOP's shoulders slumped. I realized it was in relief.

TOP said, "Oh my goodness. I was scared for a moment."

"Wait. What?" I stammered.

"We decided way before debut to not let the possibility of a girl come between us," Jiyong explained.

"So what was with me picking?" I asked startled.

"We both wanted you for ourselves..." Jiyong said.

"But now, we realized how important our friendship is over you and how important our friendship is with you," TOP finished.

I couldn't believe my ears. "So everything is cool...?" I asked.

Jiyong shrugged. "Well, it will be a while for us to get over our feelings for you, but everything will be fine."

I smiled, truly happy. "So why don't we call up the other members and go out for some grilled eel?" I suggested.

"I'm drooling already," TOP answered laughing.

Jiyong stopped TOP from walking out from the restaurant. "Hyung, weren't you with the director...?"

TOP waved him off. "Yeah whatever." TOP said a few words to the director and then we went off to the hostel.

I skipped into the house and called out to the three figure sitting on the couch watching a comedy. "EEL!" I screamed.

Daesung jumped in his seat. "What?" he shrieked.

"Eel? Did you say eel?" Taeyang asked. He turned off the TV.

"Yes, I did," I laughed. "We're going to go out to your favorite eel grilling restaurant."

"Wow," Seungri said. "It's been such a long time since we six have been out together."

Taeyang jumped out of his seat and grabbed his jacket. "The eels are waiting for us, maknaes. Get up!"

We walked as a group to the eel shop and took a seat at a booth. I announced a toast as I held out my shot glass.

"Here's to us! The six members of Big Bang!" I cheered.

Taeyang looked from Jiyong and TOP and then to me. I smiled at him to show that everything was alright. They raised their glasses and we cheered. I smiled at TOP and then Jiyong.

His eyes stayed with mine and I held contact with him a second too long. I couldn't deny it. Despite all my restraints on my thoughts, I had to admit that if I were to choose, I would have chosen Jiyong.

But it didn't matter anymore. Friendship mattered more now. As we feasted on eel and drank shots of alcohol, I couldn't help but feel even closer to the five of them.


	16. Chapter 16

After we ate at the eel restaurant, we went home to have a movie night. When I stepped into the house, I was met with a small dog running up to me and barking. I recognized the adorable black and white canine to be Taeyang's Boss.

"Oh!" I exclaimed. "When did Boss get here?"

Taeyang and the rest of the member stepped in after me as I awkwardly bent down due to my crutches to pat the small round head of Boss.

"I brought him back from home because he got lonely," Taeyang laughed. He also bent down to Boss' level. "Hey, boy. How are you doing? Are you hungry?"

Boss yapped happily and climbed onto my lap when I ended up sitting down. I laughed in surprise. He was moderate sized and soft. His sudden love for me brought my heart a sweet warmth. Taeyang reached out and stroked Boss' chin.

I realized how much Boss meant to Taeyang through Taeyang's loving eyes. It seemed impossible for Taeyang to be apart from his baby. It looked exactly like a son and his father. Boss and Taeyang retreated to the kitchen where he fed Boss nutritious dog food while the rest of us changed to our pajamas to watch a drama.

"How about Boys Over Flowers?" Seungri suggested as we settled on the couch.

"Yes, please," I quickly answered. They all looked at me, shocked at my sudden out burst. I stared back at them. "What? Lee Min Ho is hot," I said.

Jiyong laid snapped his fingers sassily. "Woah, I thought we were your idols," he said.

"Yeah, singing idols," I replied.

"I'm an actor too..." TOP murmured, offended.

I laid a hand on him. "It's okay. You'll get there."

He stuck a tongue out at me. "Just to let you know, I played Goo Jun Pyo in our BOF parody," TOP said.

"Yup," I smiled.

"Do you have nothing to say?" TOP asked.

"Nope," I answered.

"Nothing about my kiss with Daesung?" he pressed on.

"Hyung," Daesung warned. "It wasn't even real. Don't talk about it."

"It was real for me..." TOP whispered.

Seungri rolled his eyes. "I'm starting it."

Taeyang took a seat next to me and Boss hopped onto the couch to squeeze next to me and him. It felt comforting to have a little, warming and breathing body beside me.

After 5 episodes into the drama, we all began to fall asleep so we turned the TV off and didn't bother to go to our beds. We all ended up sleeping on the couch together. The next morning, we got ready and reported to the YG building where we rehearsed for the YG concert. I only had a radio station session today so I had more time to practice.

Suddenly in the middle of practice, Sae Kyung burst into the rehearsal room even if she texted me my schedule this morning. She looked excited when she reached me.

"Mindy-ssi!" she exclaimed. I looked up at her.

"Yes, unni?"

Her grin was big and wide. "You just got invited to perform at Inkigayo!"

The whole room erupted in applause. Se7en who sat beside me pulled me in for a hug. I didn't understand what the big deal was.

"Yeah...so when is it?" I asked.

Sae Kyung's face fell. "Aren't you excited about?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, just like my other performances."

Se7en cut in. "No, you don't understand how special Inkigayo is, Mindy-ssi. When you get invited to perform there, you are considered a highly acclaimed artist. You are...let's just say...one of Us."

"Umm..." I was still confused as I looked around the room. "Yeah, I know I'm one of you guys."

"Not only YG family," Gummy smiled.

Sae Kyung told me, "You are ranked upon the top idols in Korea, Mindy. That's what Inkigayo means." She couldn't hold back her goofy grin. "In the matter of 3 days, you are the most popular artist in Korea."

It finally hit me. I've seen very popular music groups or artists perform at Inkigayo. I never realized how important it was to their career until now, until I was in their shoes.

"Am I singing Thorns?" I asked. They group laughed.

"What else will you sing?" Sae Kyung asked giggling.

I scratched my head. "I must be blanking out. Sorry."

Since my performance was in three days, I began practicing hard core even with my injured ankle and heel. I did go to my other appointments but my music video shooting was put off due to all the preparation.

Two days before Inkigayo, I went to the doctors with Daesung to check on my leg. After the doctor came back with the X-rays, he reported to me.

"It's miraculous, really," the doctor said glancing over the X-rays again. "Your heal is almost healed and your ankle is positioned correctly again. It's like it knows your performance is coming soon."

I looked to Daesung, astonished. "You mean you know who I am?"

The doctor laughed. "I don't treat patients if I don't know who they are. Plus, me and my wife and son are big fans of you. We can't wait to see you perform at Inkigayo." The doctor rubbed some medicine of my heel. "That's why I'm giving you more sturdy medicine for your heel so you can heel quickly!"

Daesung asked, "Will it heel by Inkigayo?"

The doctor laughed. "By this rate, yes! But it's always smart to keep the cast on for a few days afterward just in case."

"This is awesome, Mindy!" Daesung said to me. "You're gonna be all fine by the YG concert."

"I was hoping that," I replied.

By Inkigayo, my heel felt fine to walk on but I still kept on my cast in case. Instead of crutches, I used a cane designed with a blood red rose on the handle and lace covering the whole body. The Big Bang boys and Se7en came to cheer me on along with Appa YG, Sae Kyung, and Hye Ri. Luckily, I didn't see Jae Min anywhere and felt safe. I wore a long beautiful gown over an outfit of a red body con dress and stilettos to do a revealing in the song at the climax. I felt great especially with all five of the members there for me.

"Mindy," Seungri said. "You got this!"

TOP smiled. "Just put energy into it."

I laughed and gestured for them to put their hands in a pile in the middle. "I don't have a team yet to do this with so I hope you guys don't mind."

"1,2,3 hwaiting?" Jiyong suggested.

I nodded, smiling widely in his way. "1,2,3 hwaiting!"

And I was off to perform in front of the roaring crowds. Everything was a success and when the fans saw my cane, they roared in approval. I sang the correct notes on the correct beats with the correct lyrics. I was able to dance to what I could have and I tore off the gown with the help of my dancers at the climax. Everything was perfect and it seemed like nothing was going to ruin the evening.

After the song, I stepped off of the stage and accepted the no makeup remover napkins from Hye Ri. Appa YG came up to me and clapped me on my shoulder. I tried to act natural although I was still uncomfortable under his gaze.

"That was a beautiful performance, Mindy-ssi!" he complimented. "We should go celebrate!"

"Of course, Appa YG," I answered him smiling.

"Meet me at the Sunset Club after you clean up," he told me.

I nodded. "I will see you there!"

Appa YG left and the rest of the YG family followed. Taeyang waved to me as he left and I was left with Hye Ri and Sae Kyung to clean up. It took an hour or so because we ran into some important people in which we invited to the party. After that, I climbed onto the car with the two and drove to my first ever after party as an idol.

When I stepped into the club, the music was loud and it was crowded with the YG staff and artists with their friends. I made my way around the mass of bodies to Appa YG who sat with Psy and a few others eating snacks and drinking from a bottle.

"Appa YG!" I greeted, waving.

Appa YG looked over from talking to Psy to say, "Aww! How cute, Mindy-ssi! Please, have a drink." He pointed to the bar on the side.

Sae Kyung said to me, "Don't drink too much. You might do bad things and Appa YG wouldn't be happy when he finds out." She looked to her watch. "I've got to get going now."

I stopped her. "Unni, why aren't you staying?"

She winked. "My shift right now is technically over and I'm going out with my boyfriend."

I giggled. "Have fun," I said.

She left and left me with Hye Ri. Hye Ri said to me, "Go have fun, Mindy-ssi! Dance!" She pointed to a group of stylists sitting together. "I'm going over there."

I nodded and I was left alone. I eventually walked over to the bar to order a light beer when I found the five members sitting together joking about something. They all looked like they already had a few drinks.

"Mindy!" Daesung cried out, standing up. "Come dance with me!"

He held a cup of alcohol and grinned widely. I took the cup from him and laughed. "Of course, I will."

I took a sip of the alcohol and we started dancing oddly to the songs playing. Daesung partied like a party animal and I couldn't believe this side of him. I took off my cast and crutches since they were in the way and continued dancing along with him.

Eventually, we both tired out and sat back down with the other members. Taeyang poured me a cup.

"To Mindy!" he exclaimed. "For performing like a badass on that stage and capturing the nation's hearts!"

"Cheers!" we yelled as we clinked cups.

When we all had enough drinks, the members went over to a table to talk to 2NE1. I wanted to erase the bitter taste from my mouth so I went to the bar to find something refreshing.

"One soda, please," I told the bartender.

"Make that two," a voice said beside me. I looked over my side to see a handsome, tall man about TOP's age. He smiled at me. I couldn't think clearly so I leaned against the bar suggestively and smiled back.

The man laughed. "You are the big star of tonight."

"I might be just that," I giggled.

I looked to the flashing lights to watch them for a second. I turned back to the man to find he took my drink and was handing it to me. He held up his own drink.

"Cheers, to Mindy for being an amazing, beautiful girl," he said. I giggled and took a sip of the soda. It felt refreshing in my mouth. The man winked.

"I think Thorns is a great song. Jiyong oppa was a big help," I uttered.

The man nodded. "He must be. He's a music genius!"

"I find it funny he doesn't know what himself," I answered shaking my head. "Excuse me. I must use the restroom."

The man stopped me and held onto my arm. "Oh, let me escort you. You just broke your heel and I don't think you should walk around drunk like this."

"I am not drunk!" I protested. I realized my head was spinning and it was hard to concentrate in one spot. "Actually..."

The man laughed. "Let me." He led me to the restrooms. Before I was able to step in, my head began pounding and I felt as if I was going to pass out.

"Goodness, I must have drank a lot," I laughed.

I leaned against the wall. The man didn't say anything. My vision became blurrier and suddenly, everything turned dark.

The next morning, I woke up to sunlight shining through thin curtains. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and looked around. Something wasn't right. I looked down at the sheets surrounding me. They weren't the same sheets back at the hostel. Did I change them before going to the party? Why didn't I remember anything? Something was terribly wrong.

When my head cleared a little more, I realized I wasn't in my bed. In fact, I wasn't even if the hostel. I looked down at myself to find that was only wearing panties and a bra and my clothes were strewn across the room. My heart began beating furiously. I quickly got out of the bed and ran around the room trying to find my phone. It was in the pocket of my skirt.

When I looked at it, I found countless messages from the members, Sae Kyung, Hye Ri, and Appa YG asking where I was urgently. I sat down on the floor and surveyed the scene. What had happened? And I knew it wasn't a good thing either.

I began panicking. I had no idea where I was. I had no idea what happened to me. I was completely lost. I looked around at my clothes on the floor and soaked in the fact that what I dreaded the most might have happened. As tears fell down my cheeks, I gathered my clothes and pulled them on shamefully.

I eventually called Jiyong. His frightened voice replied to mine. "Mindy. Oh my God. Where are you?" he said. "You weren't home and..."

"Oppa," I cried into the phone.

I couldn't control my sobs anymore. "I'm so scared." There was silence.

"Where are you?" Jiyong finally asked. I looked around and found a placard with the location on it. I found out I was in a hotel and told Jiyong.

Around 15 minutes later, there was a knock on the door. I stood up from my crouched, armadillo position and quickly wiped the tears from my eyes. I opened the door and the five members burst in, their worrying eyes first surveying the room and then me.

As hard as I tried, I still let the tears come flowing out. Seeing this, Seungri wrapped his arms around me and led me out of the room.

"We're going home," he stated. On the way to the hostel, the members tried to ask me what had happened and how I ended up there. I couldn't answer it because I had no answer. I never found the courage to tell them how I had waken up.

When we got home, TOP made me a cup of tea and insisted for me to eat something. Everything that went down my throat became a lump.

"Mindy, you have to tell us exactly how everything happened," Taeyang told me after we all sat down at the dining table. I stared down at my tea and gripped the cup tightly.

Daesung realized something was wrong. "Mindy...how did you wake up this morning?" he asked.

I bite my lip to hold back the tears. But I ended up letting everything out along with the tears. After I finished, Jiyong instantly stood up and got his keys.

"Oppa! Please don't tell Appa YG," I pleaded.

Jiyong shook his head. "We have to find out who did this to you and arrest him."

"And it's the best," TOP said. "The president was out of his mind with worry for you. It's right for us to tell him exactly what happened."

"I was being stupid. I drank too much," I muttered.

Jiyong answered, "I still have to notify the president."

He quickly left. The five of us stayed in silent.

"Why don't you get cleaned up, Mindy?" Taeyang suggested.

I nodded and got out of my seat. Suddenly, I felt a sharp pain shoot up from my heel and stumbled against the table. Daesung quickly grabbed my arm to steady me.

"Mindy!" Seungri exclaimed.

"What's wrong?!" Daesung asked me.

TOP stood up. "Is it your ankle?" I groaned and took a seat back down. "I didn't realize this until now..."

Taeyang shook his head in worry. "We have to take you to the doctor."

"That bastard must have done something to your heel!" Seungri snarled.

"Come on," Daesung said. "Let's go."

They helped me into Taeyang's car and we rode to the doctor's. Everything was turning out wrong when everything was going great. If my heel doesn't heal back in time, I wouldn't be able to perform in the concert effectively. Not only that...if the story of my scandal was released, it would be the end to my idol career. It would be the end to everything.

"Your heel will be fine," the doctor told me. He smiled. "It's just a little weaker than before. You must have worked to hard to rock that stage last night."

I looked over to the four members. They looked almost relieved. After the doctor had put some more medication on my heel, we drove to the YG building to meet up with Appa YG.

"It's a relief the story didn't come out," Daesung sighed.

"That would be chaos." Seungri shook his head. "I still don't understand why that person would do such a thing. Mindy is a highly acclaimed artist already."

"It doesn't mean I don't have antifans," I said.

"And doesn't mean the person wasn't in for the violation of it either," TOP mentioned.

Taeyang laid a hand on my hand. "We'll find out who it is, Mindy. Just relax. I don't think anything too had happened."

Except for the fact that my virginity might have left the building. The odd thing was I didn't feel anything different or out of place from last night regarding the subject. All I felt was violated and harassed but not broken. We finally reached the YG building and made our way to the top floor.

When we stepped in, Appa YG stood up from his seat and came over to me to grab me on the shoulders. "Are you hurt, Mindy? Are you okay?" he demanded.

"Yes, I am fine," I said as I looked over to Sae Kyung who had dark circles and red eyes. "Unni..." I whispered.

Sae Kyung stood up and wrapped her arms around me. "I was so worried," she sniffed. "I got a call late at night with my boyfriend and Jiyong told me you were missing. I didn't know what to do and I was in charge of you!"

"Unni..." I said. "All that matters is that I am here now."

"It's not your fault, Sae Kyung noona," Jiyong said from his position on the couch. "It was crazy. We didn't expect for this to happen."

We all took a seat and Appa YG began talking. "Fortunately, the story was not released to the public. In fact, we are the only people who know about it. My recommendation to pretend nothing happened...at all," Appa YG said.

Taeyang said, "It's only been a few hours...what if someone found out?"

"All hell will break loose," Appa YG replied. "Mindy-ssi's career will be crushed."

"They're going to make it look like Mindy asked for it right?" Jiyong said.

"Depends on who 'they' are," Appa YG answered. A woman came in and handed Appa YG a large envelope. "Who is this from?" he asked.

"It doesn't say. I just found it in your mailbox," the woman replied.

Appa YG quickly opened it and pulled out three glossy photos and a note. He froze in spot.

"What is it?" Seungri said.

He took the photos and stared down at them. I saw myself of the bed with a blurred out image of a man next to me. I felt a load of shame empty itself on me. Daesung took the note from Seungri.

"Text," Daesung read. He looked up. "What does that mean?"

Everyone freaked out asking each other what the note meant and how the photos came to be. I sat there silent. Eventually, when I couldn't keep in my discomfort, I excused myself to the bathroom. After washing up, I received a text from a blocked number.

"_Meet up with me at 9 PM at the park. If you don't show up or if you tell anyone about this, I will release the photos to public._"


	17. Chapter 17

I froze in my spot, processing the text. Something in my mind told me I should go to straight back into Appa YG's office and tell everyone about it. But another feeling told me if I were to tell them, the person who texted me would have known instantly. So instead, I pulled on a straight face and walked back into the office.

"Are you alright?" Jiyong asked me when I came back in.

I nodded and smiled then turned to Sae Kyung and Appa YG. "Should we get this day started? It seems like there is no threat for these photos."

Appa YG shook his head. "There should be a reason why the person would send these photos."

"They could be telling us that they are not releasing this to the public and wanted to give it back to us," I said simply. "We don't know anything now."

"Mindy is right," Sae Kyung agreed. "They didn't tell any of their motives so there is really nothing to do about it except stay nice to the press in case..."

"So we'll continue to act like nothing's wrong?" TOP asked.

"Exactly," Appa YG answered. "Alright. To your schedules, boys and Sae Kyung go over Mindy's."

I started the day as normally as I could present myself. I laughed when there was a joke. I listened when I was instructed. I sang to Thorns. I smiled and answered the interviewer's questions. But the pit in my stomach reminded me of the dreaded appointment at 9.

What would they tell me to do? Make me do? Who was it? I was so scared of walking out on my own and lying straight to Appa YG, Sae Kyung, and the members. But I knew I had no choice. I even began creating a new song with Jiyong and TOP. As we sat and decided the rhythm and beat and melody, my mind started to wander and worry. TOP recognized my furrowed eyebrows and frowned.

"What is it, Mindy?" he asked, concerned.

Jiyong looked over from the keyboards to see me. His eyes brimmed with worry. I stared into their deep eyes. I wanted to tell them everything. I wanted to tell them all of my worries but I held back.

I smiled. "Ahh...well, I'm still sort of new with creating music..." I stammered.

Jiyong laughed. "You are doing extremely well for a rookie, Mindy."

"The beat for this song is quite catchy," TOP complimented.

I slightly smiled and returned to my work. After the whole day was over and after dinner with the members, I came home to find that it was merely 10 minutes before my appointment. I quickly packed a few necessities like pepper spray in the case of it being something worse than a meeting. I stuffed everything in my pocket so it would look obvious that was going somewhere told far.

As I stepped out of the door, Taeyang called me back. "Where are you going?" he asked from the kitchen. I stopped dead in my tracks. He looked up from a document. "Hmm?"

"I-I'm going on a walk," I said.

"Would you like for me to come along? It's a bit late," he replied.

I shook my head nervously. "Some walks are...meant to be alone."

He laughed and told me to be back before 11. I set forth for my mysterious appointment. I reached the park exactly on 9. I quickly scanned the dimly illuminated park for any signs of people. My eyes landed on a figure walking slowly towards me. It was slim and it seemed to wear heels. Eventually, the face became clear. I gasped in shock.

It was Jae Min.

"What do you want?" I said between clenched teeth.

I gripped my cane until my knuckles became white as stared into Jae Min's wide, hazel eyes. She looked calm. I was furious.

"Why did you do that to me?" I asked further. My anger was about to burst. "Why did you have to hurt me and everyone around me?"

"I could be standing in your spot right now," Jae Min simply said.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

She stepped a little closer into the light but it didn't hide the demonic look in her eyes. "I trained early in the morning everyday for the past 10 months," she said. Her eyes shone fury. "I was ready to be accepted into YG. I spent 3 years working up to the president so I could convince him to let me train. But you came along."

She took a step closer to me. "The president said he liked me better as a stylist. No..." Her eyes suddenly brimmed with tears. "He wanted to only promote you. You stole my hopes and dreams. I could be working along with Jiyong oppa right now. I could be drinking wine with TOP oppa. I could have been close to Big Bang...and I spent 3 years trying to get there."

"You...just to get close..." I stammered.

Tears fell down her cheeks. "So I tried to prevent it."

"The rings," I gasped. "Bad Boy ruined."

"I had to stop it," she cried.

I continued, "My audition. The attacking fans. My debut. The forgotten lyrics."

Jae Min was close to bawling. "I wanted to end your career so badly."

"And...the pictures." I stared deeply into her eyes with fury. "You are a monster."

"I might be," she sniffed. "But I will do all I can to reach what I deserve."

I stayed silent as I felt a burning hot anger wash over me in waves of adrenaline.

"I want you to leave," Jae Min said.

"What?" I asked shocked.

Jae Min shook her head. "Leave. Leave Korea. Leave YG and Big Bang. Leave like you've never existed."

"I can't just leave!" I screamed. Jae

Min stepped nose to nose with me, threatening. "I will release the photos and your reputation will be ruined. It wouldn't matter then, would it?" Jae Min demanded. I stared at her shocked. "You've done the worst things for the members. You've torn them apart. You've distracted them from their work. And you've strung them on to the point where they fought with each other over you. What more damage can you do?"

It sent a pang to my heart in realization that all that she said was true.

"Now, who is the monster now?" she whispered.

From the beginning, I brought an inconvenience to Big Bang. I bothered them to company me to something I might not have been destined for. They even took me in when I had no home. And most importantly, I had torn them apart multiple times.

"I-I don't know...what to do," I stammered.

"You were never meant for it anyway. You don't belong," Jae Min stated. "You can leave and you can do it quietly."

I stared into her demonic eyes, searching for the right answer. All I found was a reflection of myself.

I knew I truly didn't have a choice. I had no choice but to leave and let the Big Bang members return back to their successful lives. Jae Min was right. I didn't belong. I never did. In fact, I just got lucky to get this far. But it had to end someway, somehow.

"What do I do?" I answered Jae Min with a trembling voice.

A thin smile spread on her lips. "It's simple. The members have a watch on you 24/7. They will know if you leave for the airport. Unless they are occupied with a concert or performance."

I felt tears begin to form at the corner of my eyes. "Then...how...?" I didn't want to show Jae Min I was weak with my tears so I clenched my teeth together and swallowed back the lump in my throat. "Where? How will I leave?"

Jae Min took a seat on the bench and I followed suit. She said, "The third day of the YG Family Concert is going to be cut short due to the start of renovations on the concert hall so there will be no big finish for the whole family. Big Bang performs after you so during the time they are gone, you slip out."

"I can't just leave!" I exclaimed. "Don't have to tell them? Anyone? The nation?"

"Tell anyone," Jae Min replied. "Just not them. They will do everything in their power to stop you. And it will be the worse for them. Reporters will begin to think of what importance you bring to the members."

"Okay," I sniffed. "I will do this. As much as it hurts..."

"It's all for the best," Jae Min finished for me.

That night when I got home, I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned in bed; sweat pouring down the side my face. Just leaving with no good bye...I couldn't believe that I had to do that; to disappear like bubbles.

The next morning, I met with Appa YG in his office. I sat in front of him on the couch with two cups of tea before us. Appa 6 realized it right away when I stared down at my lap.

"What's the matter, Mindy-ssi?" Appa YG demanded. As if on cue, I began to sob. Appa YG quickly stood up and grabbed my shoulders. "What is the matter?!" he exclaimed when I had said nothing.

When I got control of my sniffs, I was able to mutter. "I am going to leave."

"Excuse me?" Appa YG asked. "What do you mean?"

I couldn't keep my sobs in. "I am going to leave. I am going to leave this life. And I am going to leave Big Bang."

"Why...what do you mean by that?" Appa YG stuttered. He lowered his arms in utter surprise. "What's going on, Mindy?"

I lowered my eyes as the tears came tricking down. I had to tell Appa YG but not everything. I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes.

"Here," I said gesturing to the couch, "take a seat. I think it will take a while."

"Mindy, is it because of the pictures? Nothing is happening. You are fine," Appa YG convinced.

"I know I am fine. It's just that I don't belong and I never did." I looked into his sharp eyes. "My audition and everything, it was luck. I never dreamed of this so it can't be fit for me," I said.

I eventually explained to him how I was going to leave during the YG concert after I do a private interview with a famous interviewed so they could release the news with the correct vantage point. I also told him to keep it from the members.

"And why would you want that?" Appa YG asked. "Wouldn't they be the ones to support you?"

"Because I don't have enough courage to," I told him.

Appa YG still seemed skeptical about it. He shook his head silently.

"Look, Appa YG. I have to go back. I have Stanford. I have my old life. And there are probably hundreds of people out there who want me to return to where I really belong."

"And how about the other thousands who want you to stay and continue promoting?" Appa YG asked.

I smiled sadly. "After all the trouble I caused, I don't think I have the right or the courage to stand straight where I am anymore. I don't know how I stood so straight for the past weeks, but now I know I have to sit back down to where I originated."

"I can't believe you are doing this, Mindy," Appa YG mentioned. "You can't actually!"

"The contract says until the end of August. It's the end of the August and I made my decision."

I said it even if I didn't mean it. I didn't want to leave. For the first time in a long time, I loved what I was doing. But I was going to do everything I could to help the members return to how they were supposed to be. Sae Kyung suddenly burst into the room. She looked incredibly worried.

"I suddenly had a terrible feeling about you, Mindy and thought you would be up here," she cried. "Are you alright?" She looked to Appa YG. "What is going on?"

Appa YG said, "Mindy has decided since it is the end of the official contract." Appa YG turned away from Sae Kyung. "She will be leaving."

Sae Kyung's hand flew to her mouth and tears instantly sprouted from her eyes. She couldn't say anything. She was choked back in tears.

"Unni," I cried along with her. I ran over to her and wrapped my arms around her and let her release the tears onto my shoulder.

"Mindy-ssi, why? Please don't," she pleaded.

I pleaded to myself to think this over again. Was leaving right? Did it make me a coward or a hero? I swallowed and told her.

"I don't have enough courage to tell you it's beyond my capability now. I will leave. But I will never leave your soul."

Sae Kyung, Appa YG, and I sat down and discussed how I was to leave as quietly as possible. Sae Kyung couldn't suppress her sniffs so every once and a whole, we had to bear the sudden sob.

After laying everything down with them, I went down to the styling rooms to go to a press conference for my single with GD and TOP. I stumbled upon Se7en who also came into the room for a radio session.

"Eo, Mindy-ssi. It's good to see you again," Se7en greeted. "I heard a lot of things happened. I hope you keep strong, dongseng."

"Thank you, Se7en sunbae," I answered as I sat down on the chair next to his. He raised his eyebrows as the stylist messed with his hair.

"Sunbae? That's new," he answered.

I realized that Se7en had the right to know about my decision so I texted everything to him and awaited his reaction. Se7en quickly looked down at his phone when he received the text and scanned it.

Suddenly, he shouted, "What?! Why?"

I quietly gestured for him to lower his voice and return to texting. We went back and forth like that. He tried convincing me that it was a bad decision but nothing swayed me. I knew it was something I had to do. After we finished preparing and exited the room into the hallway, Se7en stopped me from going down the elevators just yet.

"Mindy-ssi..." he whispered.

I shook my head. "I'm sorry."

He stared at me sadly for a moment and then walked off by himself. I continued with my schedule with a heavy heart. After the conference, rehearsal for the concert, and working on the song with GD and TOP, I went home and had dinner with the members. I worked on some lyrics by myself and then went to sleep.

In the middle of the night, I woke up. I remembered no dream except blank darkness. I tried to close my eyes again and sleep but it never came. So instead, I climbed out onto the roof and took a deep breath.

"Well..." a voice said behind me.

Without looking around, I already knew it was Jiyong. "Oppa, why are you always awake when I am? And how do you know to come back here?" I asked.

He took a seat beside me. "I just know. And your room's door was open when I went to the restroom for a pi-"

"Thanks for info but no thanks," I cut him off.

Jiyong smiled and stared off to the buildings in the distance. If one looked hard enough, they would see the YG building. "So what's up?" Jiyong asked. "What's on your mind? Are you having nightmares again?"

"No, those are long gone," I answered.

"Then what's wrong?" he asked again.

I stared into the distance for a moment, trying to come up the best way to answer it.

"You know how you told me not to run away?" I said. Jiyong nodded. I looked over at him. "What happens when it's the only choice?"

He stared at me, soaking in the question. "Then you make another choice," he answered.

We held each other's eyes for a moment longer. I felt his sudden concern for me grow bigger as his eyes bore deeper into my thoughts. I turned back to the buildings and laid my head onto his shoulder, smiling.

"I will always remember this moment. Just the like many that led up to this," I sighed.

"You say that like you won't be able to come back to it or something," he suddenly said.

My heart skipped a beat. "I say it like I want to."

He stayed silent. I smiled again to reassure him.

"I'm going to bed. Good night," I said.

I quickly stood up and went back to my room and closed the door. My eyes clouded up with tears and I slumped against the door. I tried to keep my sobs as quiet as possible but they still came, pouring out with all my hurt and misery.

I'm so sorry, Jiyong, that I'm running away. I'm so sorry I couldn't keep my promise...


	18. Chapter 18

The next week dragged on and on. My heel healed quickly and my song with GD and TOP was ready to be released. It was hard looking in each of the memberst going to see them again soon.

Three days before the start of the YG Family Concert, Appa YG scheduled a private interview with a very trusted and certified interviewer that would release the information only after I left.

I wore my normal clothes; the attire of what I would wear at the hostel on lazy Sundays. And I wore my brave, acting face, the face It satisfied with my work, I could have the authority to leave and return to America.

I stared down at my cuticles and swallowed back my tears. I took a deep breath and looked back up at the camera again. I opened my mouth to say more but it wouldnCan you please cut that out?my choice is to return back to America and continue my career at Stanford University. The stardom wasn

I: What do you feel about that now?

M: I-umm-Iin myself. It you close to them? Do they know about this before this interview?

I shook my head. I knew this was coming, the questions regarding the members and I knew I had to answer. I pulled on my brave face.

M: No, I donbefore this

(I turned to the camera so that I was talking directly to them.)

M: Daesungt ever want to stop looking at it. Why are you so happy all of the time? You taught me lots, oppa. I can never repay you on the ways you told me to just smile and be healthy.

Taeyang oppa

(Tears began seeping out of the corners of my eyes and I laughed, embarrassed as I wiped them.)

M: Seungri oppare adorable. Youre always the first one to reach and wrap you arms around me. I donI love your silliness. You bring a smile to my face everydaym going to miss you so much.

(I began to feel the large watery sobs coming as I began on the next member)

M: TOP oppayou took me by my hand and led me out of my misery. We had so many adventures together and Ire such a baby but it brings so much character to Big Bang. Youre an amazing person, period. Please donll remember you.

The interviewer handed me a few tissues to mop up my eyes and I accepted them heartily. I cleaned up myself a bit before addressing Jiyong.

M: Jiyong oppat say how sorry I am. You must be so disappointed.

(Tears almost drowned.)

M: My Big Bang oppas, Im sorry. Ibreathe.

(I was barely able to say to next words.)

M: Saranghae. And I am so sorry.

I left soon after that. Because the concert was so close, our schedules mainly consisted of practicing and rehearsing at the concert hall. I spent a large amount of time with the members and other YG family members, which broke my heart every second. The week before that, I finished filming the music video for Thorns in which I was to release on the first concert day along with my song with GD and TOP called Hot Air Balloons.

While rehearsing with the members on a collaboration of the American song No Air, we ended up messing around the balloons meant for Hot Air Balloons.

m curious to what this song would be about,Especially since it** he said. s a weird combination. Yah!**I walkedI jumped

**Laughing, I screeched the lines from the pre-chorus after Taeyang**But HOOOOOWWW do you expect MEE

**Jiyong groaned. m starting to question how you got into YG in the first place.**I question it many times myself,Alright!I just want to congratulate Mindy on coming this far. It** The members cheered for me as I felt my cheeks grew pink and my heart thumped against my chest. **

**Jiyong said it as if he wanted to question if I wanted to go further. He said it like he knew. **

**I smiled brightly to cover up. **

**Se7en who stood at the bottom of the stage caught my eyes and waved me over. Realizing my chance to escape and start breathing again, I excused myself and ran over to Se7en. **

**he exclaimed. **

**I grabbed his arm and led him back to the dressing rooms as I said, t know!**Do you think he knows?s ears. I knowt know. I hope not. But he canright? It have any control over think that?You think Jiyong wouldn

**I widened my eyes in shock. I shook my head. **

**s no saying,**You should try to-What** Jiyong said from behind me. I quickly turned around, whipping my long hair at his face. He closed his eyes in pain. **

**I exclaimed. **

**m going to try on my costume. But I asked first,**What are you two talking about?What? Is it so wrong to just talk to Mindy-sshi?Is it a crime?I was just wondering what you two are talking about. It seemed pep talk for my first couldn** Jiyong demanded. **

**Se7en stood up and wrapped his arms around me in a lovingly and brotherly way. Jiyong**Mindy-sshi and I have a deep , back to work for me. Great work up there, the both of you. Keep it up,What?I just have this really bad feeling that I** he replied. **

**The sentence shot a pang into my heart but to cover it up, I giggled. t make sense. Ihere.**Yes, but every time youGet back to work, oppa,What is this?!You would dare to squeeze my cheeks!You two need to get back to work,Such , you shouldn** Jiyong said. **

**The rest of the members climbed down the stage with us to go to costume fitting. The rest of the day, we rehearsed everything for the concert and didns shoulder. **

**When we reached home, I decided I wanted to spend all the time I could with the members. **

**s pull an all-nighter,**What?She said she wanted us to pull an all-nighter,Why would we ever do that? We have to wake up tomorrow,You mean we have to wake up todays a good idea. Friendships grow from !Where

**I walked into his room to find him on the bed facedown. He seemed to be fast asleep. I sighed, climbed onto his bed, and jumped to kingdom come. He sat up to quickly and fell off of the bed. **

**I demanded. **

**he muttered from the floor. **

**re going to pull an all-nighter,**And I

**TOP stood up rubbing the sleep from his eyes. **

**And we began our all-nighter. As the night grew later and later, our brains became mush and we began doing stupid things**FANTASTIC BABY!t think clearly, I declared a contest on how far any of us could spit off the roof. We ended up spitting on a drunk on the street below. We ran into the house then and collapsed on the floor littered with blankets and pillows from our pillow fight earlier.

We basically failed our all-nighter because one by one, we drifted off into sleep. Before I lost consciousness, I heard Jiyong whisper, t run away, Mindy.t blame her though. I was meant to leave. I never belongedAh!You got lipstick on my teeth.I-gathered in the green room for a group huddle. It was a large circle but it felt like home. It brought tears to my eyes even before the awaited speech from one of the oldest member of the family.

re going to smear your mascara and ruin your makeup,Ay, CL. It

**m not crying,**One thing you learn from being an idol is to hide your bad feelings, Mindy. But tonight, we shouldnMindys your first concert. And we want to make it the best concert youre in sauna or feel like you

**He took a step out and stuck out his hand for a cheer. We all quickly contributed our hands. **

**he said, YG FAMILY **

**two **

**And off we went. 2NE1 opened the stage and then I joined them for a collaboration of Go Away. After that, I sang Thorns. GD&TOP entered to sing Hot Air Balloon with me. The audience roared in approval of the new song. Once Hot Air Balloon was completed, I exited the stage for them to do their thing. **

**After all the artists had their stage, the whole YG Family wore the family apparel and poured onto the stage for a full collaboration conclusion. By 10 PM at night, the concert was over and we hopped onto our cars after cleaning up for a party at Psyt experience a single emotion. I hid the suitcases in my closet for Sae Kyung to pick it up later. **

**I took a last look around the house when I stepped out of the room and choked on the incoming tears. I will always remember the way Daesung laid on the couch when watching dramas; how Taeyang cooked for us almost every night; how TOP screamed from his room whenever he wanted us to listen to a new track he made; how Seungri would complain when the water got too cold in the shower; and how Jiyong liked to play Star Wars with the umbrellas by the doorway. **

**Everything seemed to come to an end. Last night, I visited So Young, Sang Ki, and Eun Mi who barely came home from the countryside the day before. I talked to them about my leaving and quickly thanked them and left before having them see my tears. I said goodbye to almost everything, Boss, the man from the coffee shop I see every morning, the YG Building itself, the park where Big Bang and I first hung out, the recording studio, the dance studiot have the opportunity to say goodbye to the people who I cherished the most; the five men I fell in love with; the reasons why I was where I was in the first place. I felt cowardly even disgusted by myself. But I told myself: If it were meant to be**Mindy, what took you so long? Get in the car!Before going to the concert hall, I want to go visit another place first

**TOP looked at his watch. ? I mean, we are around 30 minutes early.**Then let** I exclaimed. **

**As I climbed onto the car, Jiyong looked over at me suspiciously. I almost saw the gears shifting in his head to formulate my sudden proposal. But I knew he wouldnt even suggest I would do. But**Let

**Daesung said to me, t we going to get food?**We could get food there, oppa,This is where I spent my first night in Korea with you five,Thatm can** Taeyang asked. **

**I scratched my head as I thought of an answer. Jiyong furrowed his eyebrows. I quickly replied, I wanted to refresh it.**Mindy** Jiyong said. **

**Tears formed in my eyes again. The feeling became familiar now since every time I was reminded of leaving, they came. They kept coming back like the infinite amount of memories I shared with the members. And it killed me knowing that this was the last memory I could share with them. **

**I opened my arms to all of them. **

**I simply said. **

**They hesitated, processing my reply. But I smiled, willing them to come and they did. Their warm, strong arms wrapped around me without question. I allowed myself to release a tear. I breathed in their mixed scent. I imprinted every single detail in mind so I would never forget my last moment. **

**After we let go, I insisted we head to the concert hall to begin sound check before the concert. Everyone was bustling and busy. I got ready separately from the members so I barely got to see them. A few minutes before the concert officially started, Appa YG came into my dressing room. He held a box for me. **

**?**We had a little contest. One lucky winner gets a YG jacket signed by all of the artists and one jacket of their favorite YG artist. In here is the signed YG jacket and the signed Big Bang jacket.I never entered any contest** I muttered. **

**Appa YG shrugged. **

**I realized what he was trying to do. I sniffed. He pulled me in for a hug as I tried to keep my tears in. really thank you.**Sae Kyung and I will escort you to the airport. Hurry off the stage, araso?t stop. I let it flow. Was this it? Was this the end? I broke my stare and rushed down the stairs. I passed the dressing room where the three other members waited for their Big Bang performance together.

Taeyang, Seungri, and Daesung were continuing their childish game. I was close to sobbing. With one last glance, I ran away. Sae Kyung and Appa YG were waiting in my dressing room. Their shocked face when they realized I was sobbing sent a pang to my heart. I quickly took my suitcases and coat and began pulling it out of the dressing room.

you donNo!No! I have to

**I ran from the building and into the car waiting for me. Sae Kyung and Appa YG followed me. The whole time, I cried and cried as Sae Kyung held onto my hand. Appa YG was calling Se7en telling him how everything was going. We reached the airport shortly and as I lined up for my boarding pass, Appa YG handed me the phone. **

Don't look back and leave. Don't find me again and live.I** I quickly hugged the two. I kept looking back at them who stood and watched me, growing further and further away. Soon enough, they were gone behind the hordes of people at security check. Knowing it was time to leave soon, I went to my gate and boarded my plane. **

**As the plane took off, I felt nothing. I was numb of feelings once again. Everything ended. It was the end of a chapter of my life. And it was time to let go. At that moment, the members were probably exiting the stage. They probably found my letter and they are probably crowded around it, reading. I bit my lip as the tears broke through again. **

**s been an amazing time with you. Unfortunately, itm going to remember the five of you and the times we spent together until the end of time. Experiences like these only come once in a lifetimebut standing with the crowd, I**


	19. Epilogue

The phone call came at an ironic time. I was sitting on my bed with the gift box on my lap. In there were the two jackets, around 30 Polaroids, a few CDs of unreleased tracks, and other seemingly useless things. But they were relics from the best moments of my life, which took place almost a year ago.

I've gotten occasional phone calls from my former life before except there were none from the most important people in my life. I looked over at the poster of the five men posing for the song "Fantastic Baby". I laughed a little to myself thinking about the origin of that song. I couldn't blame them for not contacting me. They were so busy promoting their new album, Alive.

I picked up my phone almost reluctantly.

"Annyeonghaseyo, Appa YG," I answered.

"How have you been, Mindy-sshi? How is Stanford treating you?" he asked. I suddenly thought back to moment I stepped back into America. By then, the interview was released and I was swarmed with reporters. Eventually, Appa YG was able to restrain them from asking me any more questions but I still got stares from k-pop lovers everywhere.

"I'm amazing as always," I said. But I wasn't. My grades dropped severely and I couldn't concentrate on anything other than searching up videos of Big Bang on YouTube. I kept thinking over and over again for the past year whether I made the right decision or not.

Appa YG laughed. "No, you're not. Mindy-sshi…I have a proposal for you…"

[A few weeks later…]

I stood among crowds of girls over every stage, squirming. There was always something mighty strong about k-pop fans. I wore a large coat, something of irregularity for a concert, but underneath, I wore the signed Big Bang jacket, black shorts, and black shoes. My hair was tied up with a crown, still a bit lighter than my usual hair from the time I dyed my hair for the music video. In my sleeve, I gripped with my sweaty hands…a microphone.

On the outside, I looked like that typical VIP.

The concert started and adrenaline rushed through my body. I jumped along with my co-VIPs and sang at the top of my lungs. When the five boys rushed out onto the stage, around only 3 yards from me, my heart almost stopped. Not only was I afraid I would get caught, but they would point me out. Jiyong's eyes swept the audience and stayed on my face a second earlier.

I pretended I dropped my glow stick and dropped down to the floor. When I jumped back up, he had moved on. The concert progressed and I prepared myself for the big surprise. They began singing Haru Haru. Jiyong…and then TOP…and then Jiyong…and then TOP…and then…

I threw off my coat along with my glow stick, climbed over the fence dividing me from them, and jumped onto the stage, singing, "Dorabojimalgo tteonagara…" The crowd fell silent. The words coming out of the members' mouths were silent because their mics were turned off. All eyes were on me.

At first, the members froze trying to process what had just happened. I continued singing…approaching them. Seungri was the first one to realize that it was I. He rushed over to me and pulled me in for a bear hug.

The chorus was ending so I signaled for him to start the next verse. Realizing what was happening, he continued. I reached over to Daesung and he pulled me in for a hug, still dazed. The crowd roared with approval, knowing it was me, Mindy. I was about to approach Taeyang but he reached me first and swung me into the air. TOP, surprised and shocked and filled with emotion, pulled me over and hugged me tightly, pressing a kiss onto my hair. When I reached Jiyong, he was silent.

"You ran away…" he mouthed.

"I know…" I replied. And I ran back into his arms; soaking in the familiar, warm, feeling. We continued the song together and as each second passed by, they grew livelier.

After the song ended, Taeyang introduced me, "Ladies and gentlemen! Mindy!"

I curtsied. "It's awesome to be back! So Appa YG called me up the other day and talked to me about how these boys couldn't function without me." I winked at them. "So he insisted, almost begged, for me to come back but it didn't matter because I couldn't function without YG either. So…" I felt the hot lights beat down of my face the feeling of thousands staring at me. I belonged here. And no one could tell me otherwise. "I'm back in YG."

The audience screamed for me. And I felt Big Bang's startled reactions behind me. We finished up the concert nicely and exited backstage. Soon as we were 50 yards from the stage, Jiyong stopped me.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" he yelled. Seungri hid behind Taeyang. "Leaving like that…without telling anyone?!"

"In my defense, I told everyone. Just not you guys…" I answered.

"Does it matter? You promised you would never run away but you did and you're such a coward. You could have went to anyone of us and told us what Jae Min did to you," Jiyong shouted.

"I never told anyone about what Jae Min did," I said.

TOP replied, "She confessed about two weeks after you left and resigned. I guess that guilt was killing her."

Jiyong scoffed and began stomping back to the dressing rooms. I looked at the rest of them and laughed.

"What's so funny?" Taeyang asked.

"I'm glad I'm back," I laughed.

I ran after Jiyong, hopped on his back, and planted a kiss on his cheek. "You know you missed me," I whispered in his ear. He didn't say anything but he smirked and carried me on his back all the way to the dressing room.

And just like that, I was back where I belonged. I quickly moved back to Seoul to begin my real life again. I finished my education at Stanford and visited my parents often. My relationship with the members grew along with my career. Soon enough, I was a big k-pop star. One night on a walk with Jiyong, he asked me an interesting question.

"Who are you?"

I considered the question for a minute and then smiled. My identities constantly changed. I was a schoolgirl, a k-pop princess, a rookie…but my origin never changed. I was forever…

"That typical VIP."


End file.
